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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

If you could choose... would you rather have been born male?

210 replies

wellwisher · 19/09/2011 14:13

I don't post in this section much, but this is inspired by the "Do you remember a specific moment where you realised that being female put you at a disadvantage?" thread.

I have become more feminist/aware of the disadvantages of being female as I've got older. The last few years, I've realised that if I could choose, I'd rather be male. I'm at an age where I'm starting to lose my looks and panic about my biological clock, and I resent that my male friends don't have these worries yet. Almost all my female friends have settled down and started to have children, often making major compromises to do so. Almost all my male friends are still single and enjoying their freedom. It feels so unfair! It's more than that though: women have so much additional CRAP to deal with - prejudice, misogyny, objectification, being punished by society for getting older/not being conventionally pretty, feeling physically vulnerable... honestly, if I could go back to the moment of my conception, wave a magic wand and be created male instead of female, I would do it in a snap. Yet, none of my female friends feel the same way - even though most of them are relatively feminist in their views.

Maybe I just feel like this because I don't have children. Maybe it's just me, am generally a bit gloomy at the moment... but I thought it could be an interesting discussion. What would you choose? Try to set aside any feelings associated with having had babies, as this clearly adds a huge emotional aspect to the issue. I hope that any future children of mine will be boys. I really feel I wouldn't wish being born female on anyone - and I'm aware of how easy women in the UK have it compared to most of the rest of the world.

OP posts:
ChickensHaveNoEyebrows · 19/09/2011 19:59

Jeremy, I see your 'Oh...please!' and raise you a 'FFS Hmm'

AnyFucker · 19/09/2011 20:00

other what ?

other sexist pillocks ?

I only see one on this thread

moonferret · 19/09/2011 20:01

yawn...

AnyFucker · 19/09/2011 20:02

now that I agree with

JeremyVile · 19/09/2011 20:02

I've always been against the calls for hide poster function but every time I come onto a F/WR thread lately, I totally see why it would be useful.

It's bloody sad actually.

SybilBeddows · 19/09/2011 20:02
AnyFucker · 19/09/2011 20:03

moonferret, perhaps the next thread where you see there is a sexless relationship, you could hop on and impart your wisdom

I am sure it wil be very helpful

StewieGriffinsMom · 19/09/2011 20:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StewieGriffinsMom · 19/09/2011 20:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnyFucker · 19/09/2011 20:05

sgm, it would be wrong but ooooh so right Wink

garlicnutty · 19/09/2011 20:07

Can somebody please tell me I am living on the planet Earth and assure me I'm not a man? Confused Grin

I am assertive, quite loud, and am considered a strong character.
I've been cheerfully promiscuous and no-one's called me a slut.
The same applies to my friends.

Where am I going wrong??

Oh, I haven't been able to "have sex" whenever I wanted, either Hmm

moonferret · 19/09/2011 20:10

I really can't be bothered "imparting my wisdom", a good number of people here are like you, always right (in their mind). So best leave them to it while having a good laugh at the same time...

Catitainahatita · 19/09/2011 20:11

Are you saying the only reason to be in a relationship is to have sex then Moonferret? You see, the threads on women not having sex are usually in the context of them being in a relationship with someone. It's not baffling at all; it's about caring about the other person beyond the fact that they can give you sexual pleasure.

And rofl regards your jealousy of women being able to have sex when they want. Do you hold men in such low regard that you think that the only criteria they apply when choosing who to have sex with is "she is available and not a minger"? And how do "mingers" find mates in that case? Because even people not considered wonderfully beautiful and others who you might (and I stress you) think of as ugly are in happy committed relationships.

AnyFucker · 19/09/2011 20:12

you talkin' to me, mf ?

I am not the one spouting shite < shrugs >

moonferret · 19/09/2011 20:13

SybilBeddows clearly has specific issues..! Who said that being female (or male) would automatically mean you were given the worst situation that gender could offer?! We're talking generalities here, not unusual specifics! Blimey...

SybilBeddows · 19/09/2011 20:14

I think our love is big enough to encompass AnyFucker too, Stewie.
You both have my blessing Smile

AnyFucker · 19/09/2011 20:14

mf, I can see the comedy here

you saying someone has issues when you are trying to take over a thread that asks "would you rather have been born male"

were you not born male then ?

or just not male enough Wink

AnyFucker · 19/09/2011 20:15

Sybil, that is very gracious of you Smile

SybilBeddows · 19/09/2011 20:15

Fucking hell Moonferret, you think that is the worst situation being a woman can offer? You know sod all.

the kind of thing I describe is horribly common. You haven't got a fucking clue.

moonferret · 19/09/2011 20:16

Catitain I can't be bothered unravelling that nonsense. I didn't say or imply any of that. Amazing how certain people here twist what has been said...

moonferret · 19/09/2011 20:16

AF you're being ignored...take the hint.

JeremyVile · 19/09/2011 20:17

It is curious, this belief/gripe some men have that women have the opportunity to have sex whenever and wherever the mood takes them.

I think it stems from a frustration that women, in general, have standards and - god forbid- their own likes and dislikes, they're attracted to certain men not every man .

All this 'you can have as much sex as you want' is nonsense. What they mean is.... 'why on earth aren't you having sex with me???'

AnyFucker · 19/09/2011 20:18

it's ok, mf, since I wasn't actually addressing you Smile

moonferret · 19/09/2011 20:20

JeremyVile another in cloud cuckoo land.

frumpyq · 19/09/2011 20:21

I can see moonferrets point because it's coming from a male perspective i don't think he was even lightly suggesting that it was how women think.

That aside, the thread was titled If you could choose... would you rather have been born male?

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