Porn

[msrisotto]

Tentative!

Um, the way I see it is that a lot of porn (I have heard) is appallingly violent and degrading for women. This stuff, ideally wouldn't exist and should be banned (how, I don't know, but ideally).

However, the porn that I have seen or enjoyed is not. I wouldn't enjoy porn that is degrading.

So, why is all porn bad? (in some people's opinions?) If it isn't degrading and is equal in its approach, for the entertainment of others, then I don't see any harm.

Is the argument that you don't get the 'good' porn without the bad?

Don't flame me please, I really want this to be a considered conversation.

I agree, Dittany. The men in porn look at the less appealing end of normal usually, so as not to intimidate the male target audience. The women all look like Barbie.

I didn't want to get explicit! Um, I saw porn consisting of reasonably attractive men and women having sex that was consensual. I don't know who Ron Jeremy is.

I'm not just looking at this from the perspective of men wanting to see it but of women as well. I have said that that I don't necessarily believe porn to be degrading to women so your little dig at my reasoning is not actually based on what I have said.

I don't know it is consensual. Is it beyond the realms of possibility?

I don't understand your middle paragraph. If women watch porn then it is also a female practice

Ok, it wasn't a dig, point is that you were disagreeing with something that wasn't my opinion and that I hadn't said!

I have made my own porn, do webcam and put it on sites etc. I love it personally and would be happy to have sex with loads of men on film personally. I also watch a lot of porn and dont see anything wrong with it personally. I agree with you msrisotto.

'Does ethical porn/ erotica exist?'

Cause it does go on amateur/webcam sites all of that is consensual and you can check with the person making it as they can do it live and make videos just for you etc. I ddo it and get men to make masturbation videos and couples where they have sex. Sometimes it is also threesome/couple swap etc.

For erotica I go on literotica where all people upload their own stories and there is something for everyones tastes really.

Pretty much anything serious I've read about the industry is damning: it's mainly run by men for men. They on the whole have no regard for women and the women involved have virtually no power. The money most women earn is pitiful and remember, MsR, the porn film and print industries are closely connected and I assume you don't favour printed porn (magazines etc...).

I'm afraid that assuming what you saw was ok while knowing that a lot of it, probably made/watched by the same people, is deeply degrading to women is not on.

There are always women who claim to love porn, love being prostitutes or lap dancers etc... That doesn't mean it's ok.

Jenny60 - what if you like making it and you like watching it. I like men having sex and watching them wank etc. I dont think it is wrong if you both/all enjoy it and you are both doing it. How can it be wrong if you all enjoy it and like it?

This is just when people think women dont get anything out of it either but watching porn and erotica both turn me on. I dont understand when people say the whole sex industry is wrong because some is non consensual/violent etc. Its like saying better not get in a relationship with a man as some relationships involve rape and violence. Its stupid. Sex is a normal human thing and many women and men enjoy watching it. I dont know any women that dont watch porn and use it as a masturbation aid/with a partner etc. If you choose certain stuff it isnt harming anyone.

The problem is, sunny, that unless it's stuff you've made yourself, you can never be completely sure that it really is consensual. The people on the other end of a webcam might be doing it for money because they are desperate or because they are being pressured into it by a controlling partner. You ust don't know.

However, homemade stuff isn't as much of an issue as the stuff on the internet and in magazines when you can not be sure of the origin.

I do think that some women have been brainwashed into thinking it makes them cool and laid back to get involved in this sort of thing when, actually, deep down, they might not truly be enjoying it (I am not talking about you here, necessarily, Sunny)

I know I'm going to sound a bit arsey as I did on another thread, but sex to me is something sacred, not in a religious sense but in the sense that it isn't something to degrade or use cheaply. So all porn makes me uncomfortable. To me sex is between me and my partner and needs to be honoured.

I can't understand the idea of loving someone and making a commitment to them (honouring them with my body and expecting teh same in return, to use a very old-fashioed phrase) and then getting off on someone else.

That's without the element of coercion. I also agree about women in porn films needing to take drugs (the need to get out of it accounts also for why so many young women binge drink - they know what will be epxected of them at teh end of a night out and this is the only way they can face it.).

And although not a porn star but more a glamour star, I think you only have to look into poor Katie Price' eyes or see her interviewed to know what working in that industry has done to her.

Sunny: making it yourself and having control over it probably makes what you do less objectionable than the violent/underage etc... stuff. But, you can't have control over how people view the stuff you do and you are still deeply involved in an industry that is very damaging to women overall.