Torn perineum during sex. Can I have a handhold / hug? Very sore

[Feelinglost006]

Exactly that. I had sex at the weekend. Used a condom (Tesco brand and they seemed to go very dry very quickly anyone tempted by the cheaper price compared to durex and mates etc - DONT! they are truly awful and will leave you feeling red raw) added some water based lube and felt much more comfortable. Was a bit sting-y having a wee afterwards. Anyway that night I felt hot, sore throat, feverish. banging headache which has taken days to shift. Immediately booked a covid test (My job brings me into contact with covid cases) so wanted to be careful and make sure. Had the test monday, isolated and tuesday it came back negative.

my privates became more and more swollen and lots of sores which resemble ulcers appeared/ I have had several vaginal births and the pain of being torn and stitched after birth has got nothing on this. Feels like millions of tiny papercuts. Surprisingly no discharge or smell. So i began warm salt baths, I wear cotton underwear anyway as I cant tolerate anything synthetic down there. I got some sudocreme which didnt help at all so got some vagisil (lidocaine for the pain)

Its just got worse and worse. I can barely walk, hardly sit down, its red hot, hard and swollen and gone a green / yellow colour between my vagina and anus and I have ulcers all over. Managed to get a GP appt after 2 days waiting. Was examined as scared it might be herpes. They had difficulty in examining me its so bad and painful but DR said I have a considerable tear in the perineum and a couple of smaller splits / grazes which have sadly become infected. Also have a temperature due to the infection.

Been prescribed 7 days anti biotics , tramadol for pain and paracetomol plus 5% lidocaine instead of the 2% . The tramadol isnt touching the pain at all. tried codeine phosphate and paracetomol before that which also did nothing. I am getting shooting pains deep into my vagina, stinging pains where it feels like someones cutting me with a razor blade and it feels constantly wet and damp (its actually very dry down there but feels damp IYSWIM I am dapping the area when i use the loo and it now looks like a faintly bloody / watery/ dirty dischage on the paper (have to really look at the loo roll to see the change in colour. still no smell thankfully.

Just feeling very sorry for myself and wanted a bit of a virtual hug. I wasnt deliberately hurt, he put several fingers in me which I enjoy but i think with the dry condom and friction from that then fingers has caused it to tear. I didnt even notice at the time . Feel a bit mortfied really.

Awful. Worst illness I've ever had. Glands like rocks and I couldn't even see my phone to call or text anyone for help.

Unhealthy doses of codeine got me thru it (I saw an OOH GP just as I was reaching crisis point and she was bloody lovely).

Couldn't poo for about 10 days, TMI but just blood and pus. Fucking awful OP. Massive sympathy.

I have only just read this OP. I agree with everyone else who said ring 111 or A&E. It sounds like you have an overwhelming systemic infection and might need IV antivirals. You probably also need some blood tests to check if there is some reason underlying this. Your immune system doesn't seem to be fighting it.

Poor you OP - that sounds horrific.

Sending virtual hugs

How are you now @Feelinglost006 ?

You okay op?

I'm so sorry, OP. It sounds horrendous and I hope you get relief very soon. Is someone with you taking care of you? I hope you're not alone.

OP, I'm a Nurse Advisor for a GP OOH Service & Urgent Care also. I really think you need to attend ED at this stage. If you called me I'm sure I'd hear the pain in your voice & some of what you're describing would raise red flags. You sound systemically unwell, and need attention. You've hardly been eating & drinking & you may need IV fluids & your pain & infection symptoms may require IV antibiotics/IV pain relief to sort. Please call 111 or go to ED.

Op please ring 111 or go to A&E

Hi all
Just an update as I have caught up .
So after update this morning of how bad I was. I took an anti histhamine I then slept for around 5 hours solid. Woke up briefly then several more hours solid. They totally knocked me out which I needed I think.

Going to the toilet is an absolute ordeal. We and poo means about half hour in total. The wiping or even dabbing hurts like hell. Just before any wee is about to come out it feels like pins and needles in my vagina and urethra which I guess is the nerves and pain.

Have just bathed the whole area in warm salt water in the bath applied a tiny bit of cream to try and help it and now back in bed. Only had two cups of tea , some peaches and bowl of cereal today as I have been asleep and now not hungry. I must work on that tomorrow before that makes me worse .

I am definitely calling the clinic tomorrow and will seek their advice as maybe I need something different to take and be looked at again.

I am scared about work . I had time off at the end of last year for a pre existing medical condition which is now resolved (not linked to this in anyway ) I was off for ages. I am so scared what is going to happen. They haven’t even called me so I’m guessing they aren’t happy with me. Children are with a relative luckily but they want to come home and I am not well enough in any way. No one who can have them at home for me either.

Praying I turn a corner soon. Really been so helpful to read the advice and posts here I am truly great full. An old friend of mine is passed off with me as I told her I am really ill and she wants to have whole text conversations about the break up of her marriage. This is something that’s been ongoing for 18 months so not a new thing and I have messaged at length about it lots of time’s. People an be so selfish. I haven’t told her what’s wrong with me. Said it was flu and she started complaining no ones there for me when I need to talk I guess I will have to get on with it by myself like I always do. Really don’t need this crap

Feeling tired now so will leave it at this. Will check back here later

OP, you sound like you've been to hell and back, I winced at your description of the pain that you've been going through. Your friend sounds a bit self absorbed, but do you think that she'd have a different attitude if you told her the truth of what's wrong with you? I understand why you'd rather not share all the details, but the term "flu" is so overused by some people that sometimes people don't take much notice when others use it.

Don't worry about what your employer is thinking right now, that's the least of your problems and I'm sure that your GP could find the right words to use on a sick note, to maintain confidentiality - perhaps "viral infection and extreme fatigue/exhaustion" would cover it.

Take care of yourself, it sounds like your body triggered this extreme response to force you to take a much needed rest.

Did she confirm via swab? Just wondering because I had almost identical symptoms to you but it turned out to be ulcerated hemmeroids and a bad yeast infection. I was convinced it was herpes but it wasn't

With the update I still think it's worth you being seen face to face ASAP rather than just assessed over the phone. It can be hard to put in to words just how awful you are feeling or how bad pain is

I think you need to be seen face to face too.

feeling you need a better friend. Honestly friendship is a two way thing. I had a friend who was an emotional vampire like that and I fell ill with an illness that was quite serious and she wasn't the slightest bit interested. I took note and stopped contact over time. Look after yourself, you poor thing. My heart goes out to you.

I have called the clinic will try again after 10 as don’t think they are open yet .

Ignoring self absorbed friend. If I told her what was wrong she would want the nitty gritty declare it as sounding awful and then be back onto herself and be quite judgemental about the whole thing. Not going there !

@Feelinglost006 I’d ask your GP for a sick note which they might to be able to word in a way that keeps it private. I’d just keep communication open with your Employer after you’ve spoke to your GP.
Awful that you’ve got this added stress on top of everything else.

Your friend sounds incredibly selfish, you really don’t need that on top of everything either.

I had a friend like her op, so draining. All about her! I spoke to her about it, gave her a couple of chances, then got rid.
Don't feel bad. Ignore the life out of her. Takers 😒

Did you get through to the clinic ?

Hi, op. I have been following your thread.

I think that, after you have spoken to the clinic today, if they do not recommend you see a medical professional face to face, then you should attend A+E

You may have something more serious like disseminated herpes simplex or even Stevens-Johnson Syndrome which can escalate rapidly

Please take further advice

How are you @Feelinglost006, did you get through to the clinic? Sending a very gentle hug

Have you had any improvement now op? You have had medication for a few days now so hopefully it should be starting to kick in, temp down etc?

same Nurse I saw Friday answered the phone which was handy. Test results aren’t back yet . She just told me to drink lots and lots of water and rest . Also to take another covid test to rule out having something else on top of (what she is sure is herpes) said she would be in touch . Pretty much it

So where I am at now. Muscle : nerve pain in the back of my thighs and my buttocks feel bruised.

The majority of the stinging and pain and sensation that I have broken glass in my knickers is where the perineum is and around my Anus . That’s where the pain first started where the initial first ulcer was like the epicentre I guess. The perineum is weeping constantly and it now smells foul. But keeping it bathed clean and with the cream applied . The other sores which came up round the lips now feel no more sore than it would with thrush so it’s easing there somewhat .

Turning over sitting up and walking all still sting sting sting and agony. But think that’s because it’s the perineum which was ultra sore / possibly torn or with an abrasion BEFORE all this really kicked off.

So so horrible. Shows how easy virus spreads from reading up about it.
Not everyone shows symptoms. You can have it years before an outbreak and condoms don’t fully protect against it. Just scary really

Also feel upset as I don’t sleep around and there’s that taboo isn’t there. STI she must be dirty , sleep about , it’s nasty . I feel really disgusting and ashamed when I know I shouldn’t, it’s one of those things and I haven’t done anything wrong at all

Oh forgot to say . Even passing wind now feels like a cut splitting open around my anus when i fart! Yuk

So sorry youre going through this- stay strong!

Definitely drink as much water as possible to flush your system and rest.

Also, I'd carry on with gentle salt water rinses.
Feel better soon

Also- vitamin C and zinc are really important for skin healing if you can take them.
Amazon do a probiotic called symprove which has been extensively studied to be one of the few that survives the journey to the gut. Probiotics are extremely important as your immune system is based in your gut so I'd try that too.

Gosh this sounds absolutely awful op. I'm so sorry you are going through this.