Please help. I am desperate.

[Rainbowl]

Been yoyo dieting for over ten years. Fatter than ever. BMI is 40. Size 20-22 and absolutely fucking miserable with it.

I hate myself. My self esteem is non existent. My marriage lacks intimacy because I can’t stand how I look and feel. I’m a terrible example to my kids. None of my clothes fit. The ones that do are cheap and nasty because I can’t afford to buy nice clothes that will probably be too small soon.

All I think about is my weight. Yet I cannot stop fucking eating. Chocolate mainly. All day. Every day. Constantly grazing on it. Binging too.

Oldest keeps asking if I have a baby in my tummy. I’m always the fattest person in the room. Fattest person in my extended family. I’ve even got a double chin now.

I have tried everything:
Slimming World
Weight Watchers
Slim Pod
Cambridge
Slim Fast
IF
Low carb
Calorie counting
Personal Trainer
Therapy
Not dieting
Brain over Binge
and various other things over the years I’ve probably forgotten about.

Had bloods taken to check for physiological reasons. Not on any medication. No answers there.

Nothing works. I can’t keep the weight off. I am an intelligent, successful woman in her mid-30s who loves cooking and healthy foods and yet cannot stop eating shit. I have a history of depression but other than being completely obsessed and miserable about my weight, my mood is fine.

I don’t know what to do any more. I can’t go on like this. I think I’m going to eat myself to death.

I did an e-consult this morning with the GP saying I was desperate for help. I hoped I’d get a same day appointment but it’s next week. What do I do? What do I say? I’m hoping they can give me injections or surgery because at this point, I’ve given up on being able to do it myself.

Has anyone been in a similar position and can advise please?

If it was so easy do you honestly think there would be any over weight people?

If you have nothing constructive to say, keep schtoom

Oh OP I'm so sorry to hear about your GP appointment. They've done similar to me in the past about other things "well... enough about that, I'm concerned about you". So patronising and unhelpful! And a lot of my weight gain is because of antidepressants so really unhelpful!
I'm glad you've made a decision. I think I'm coming to the same one. Keep us updated!

I'm seriously considering these injections so please keep us posted OP and best of luck!

I'll definitely let you know how I get on at the doctors tomorrow. I'm not expecting much help but I can only try!

Good luck with the mounjaro. I truly hope it helps. I'm still very tempted myself but I watched a video of how to use it and now I'm not sure if I'd be able to inject myself🫣 I'd only seen American ones that were single use and seem to have some kind of guard on them...can't really explain what I mean but the UK ones you can see the needle!!! I'm a wimp with stuff like that though and everyone else seems to do it with no problems x

Luckily I’m ok with needles although I’ve never self-injected before. I’ve read quite a lot of the Mounjaro threads now and it seems a lot of people say the needle is so small they can’t even tell it’s gone in!

Well my order has just arrived! Nervous!

I’m going to keep updating this thread as I go as it’s been so useful and might help others. I’ve also posted on the main Mounjaro thread too.

Thank you to everyone who has commented 💐

@Rainbowl I've just read your thread with my eyes welling up. I feel exactly the same about my weight, I could have written your exact post. I've even got my first mournjaro pen ready to take today.

The spiral of depression/weight gain/depression is so difficult to break. It's not laziness or some innate weakness of character that causes this, although we are made to feel it is.

I'm really hoping it works for you.

I've decided to take mine today too. Am just waiting on the postman bringing it - am tracking royal mail like a hawk.

@Rainbowl are you taking yours today?

I could have written every word of that OP! I’m really really going to try and absolutely hammer the exercise for a few months as that’s the only thing that’s worked for me in the past (wedding). Got 3 kids now and so time-poor. If that doesn’t work then I don’t know what! I’m reluctant to do ozempic because what happens when you come off it.

Well hopefully you would try and combine the semaglutide alongside a diet and exercise regime. So when you stop you've built in good habits that can stand the test of time.

F

I see. So hopefully I can do the diet and exercise without the ££ ozempic then 🤞🏻

Well yeah you can and millions of people do and have done. The semaglutides make the diet easier because they eliminate a lot of the hunger component. The downside is they don't teach people why they have lost weight which is why people put some of it back on once they stop taking it, no different to fad diets in that aspect though.

If I was in the position the OP finds herself in I'd probably put the money towards a meal prep service (though some of these can be just as pricey as the drugs) and a gym membership.

im on Wegovy and its the only thing thats worked for me, no more snacks nothing. No more sugar. Its crazy

It costs me £170 a month, pharmacy2u has discount code that makes it £155

Oh, bless you. It seems there are a few of us in the same boat at the moment. 💐

The spiral. The shame. It gets to a point where it’s all-consuming doesn’t it? Like you can’t escape. All you want in the world is to eat healthily and be a healthy weight and yet you feel completely unable to. It is so easy to blame yourself (most of society says we should blame ourselves, after all). Then the shame spiral begins again.

I’ve started reading ‘Why we eat (too much)’ after someone recommended it upthread (it was quite cheap on Kindle). I’m only two chapters in but I’m already learning so much and trying to forgive myself a bit more (although I can’t forgive myself for being obese during both of my pregnancies, the effect of which is discussed quite a lot in the book and made me very teary).

I was going to do an exercise-led approach but I’m just too heavy. I feel so uncomfortable in this body and anything too strenuous feels impossible. I’m going to wait until I’ve (hopefully) lost a couple of stone then get back into my favourite exercises - swimming, running and strength training. In the meantime, long walks!

So I’ve taken the plunge and took my first injection this evening. It was completely painless! I wouldn’t believe I’d even injected myself if it wasn’t for the mark it left. I waited for DH so he could be with me for moral support.

I’m excited but there is also a sense of “I can’t believe it has come to this” 😢

Slightly off-topic, but how do all of you with children keep needles and sharps bins etc. safely inaccessible? They can be so adept at getting around safeguards.

Excited for you! I might have been tempted to wait a couple of days 🍫🐇

Well done @Rainbowl
I felt like that too but loving it now I'm 33lbs down.
I also wanted to lose a bit before getting back into the exercise. I went for my first run in years recently, it's so good to get back to it. I feel like I'm me again.

@BingoMarieHeeler semaglutide medications (Ozempic and Wegovy) don’t just work on hunger. In fact the hunger suppression wears off a bit over time. However the medication is also helping the pancreas produce the right amount of insulin. (Hence Ozempic actually being a drug licensed for diabetes control not weight loss.) The insulin control helps with the production of blood sugar. When blood sugar and insulin production are not regulated it leads to sugar and carb cravings and weight gain. The manufacturer of the drug actually says that some people may need to take the medication for life in the same way you would take blood pressure meds if you have high blood pressure.

Like any ‘diet’ the medication will work while you are taking it. And like any diet if you go back to eating the way you ate before then you will put the weight back on.

The medication helps you ‘diet’ as you won’t be able to eat too much and your insulin/blood sugar response is more regulated. But you do need to eat more protein and fibre and drink lots of water also.

If you can diet and exercise yourself well done. But if like many of us who have been obese for a long time it’s not so easy to just do that for many many reasons.

@Rainbowl - well done and good luck! My worst side effect was constipation. Drink lots of water and eat lots of fibre. And then drink more water!

The more you look forward ‘I have X stone to lose it’s going to take me x months it’s going to be really hard’ the harder it is to motivate yourself to keep going, and the more likely you will give up.

A top tip for me is to measure your weight in lbs rather than stones and lbs.

The reason being that the 'big' number is always going down. If you are 14 stone 13lb you need to lose 14lb to get to the next stone down. But in lbs that is 209lb and you only need to lose 10lb to get under 200, or a loss of that same 13lb will take you to 195lbs which looks like a big difference.

Psychologically, it helps to see the same results but in a more impactful way.

@Rainbowl that book is really great at explaining how our bodies work against us for weight loss and how we can change that. He describes the science in a way that's easy to understand and to remember. I've been doing it 6 months (prior to that I was IF) and have lost weight without even having to try or really think about it.

I think it will work well to help adjust your diet whilst using the mounjaro and when you stop, you should be all set to continue with the easy weight loss.

I have four stone to lose. The way I am motivating myself is to work out at which weight I go from obese to overweight and aim for that first. Then overweight to top range of normal, then the weight I want to be. I’m trying to make permanent changes and not see it as a ‘diet’ otherwise it’s just too overwhelming.

Ozempic for me too. It's £185 per month from Juniper. Food noise has disappeared totally and the thought of treats does absolutely nothing for me. So therefore, I eat healthily as I know I need to eat but do t really want to. The weight has fallen off and four months later I'm almost at target weight (10st).
They provide an education programme for you too so the aim is that you are geared up for when you come off it.