I've actively decided to STOP DIETING!

[Sweetheart]

I had a long chat with some female friends of mine recently that made me really think about why I'm ALWAYS on a diet. I realised that I have pretty much been on a constant diet for the last 20 years (my entire adult life) which made me so sad! I realised that I've never really been happy with my weight and how I look and to be honest probably never will be! I'm actually not even sure that how I want to look is even attainable.

So there it is - I've decided to STOP dieting. I'm currently not at my heaviest but not at my lightest either. The weight I am now I have been hovering around for about 5 months so I'm just going to try and stick at this weight for a while and learn to actually eat normally - not constantly counting everything, weighing everything, sticking to the god forsaken rules!

I've had a few scary realisations this week........1. I am so out of tune with hunger - when I actually want or need to eat.

1. I think about food all the time - probably because I'm so deprived. I asked dh the other day why he never eats anything after our evening meal and he told me he just never thinks about food - this was a revelation to me.....I think about it constantly.
2. I don't think I've set a good example to my kids over the years. It can't be good for them to watch mum eat a salad whilst they tuck into the normal evening meal........or to watch mum weighing and measuring every bit of food......or to watch mum have a juice / shake in place of a proper meal.

I'm hoping the freedom from dieting will teach me how to actually eat normally for the 1st time in my adult life.

The only things I am imposing on myself are:-
Plenty of water each day
Try to only eat when I am actually hungry (this is a tricky one to figure out)

Has anyone ever had any experience of this? Or am I just going to end up even fatter and back on the next fad diet?

Good way to think.

I'd also like to have cracked this intuitive eating thing by the significant birthday! Not sure if that's feasible - 20 years to cock it up, 2 years to fix it?!?!?!?

What's your significant birthday going to be?

40?

Like I said before I've been on a diet for about 20 years so I'm sure you can work it out

Well if like me you were put on a diet at age 5 and always on restrictive eating thereafter then big birthday after 20 years dieting would be...25? So could be any big birthday 😂.

Thought I would pop on to tell you about my last 7 weeks. I started walking a mile a day on the treadmill and obviously continued eating when I'm properly hungry and stopping as soon as satisfied with all my favourite foods and I've gone down in body size. My goal was to get fitter , more supple and lose the stiffness so the fact that I have gone down a size and lost weight is a bonus. I also love that I can now walk fast everywhere again, climb stairs and generally feel full of energy. I am sleeping better too. I've stayed the same weight for years eating this way and that was perfect as I was never going to diet again as I love good food but I'm so proud of myself for sticking to this exercise thing.

Thought this was sooo true.

I have too stuck to not dieting . I've lots of other crap going on in my life so not worrying about my weight . I walk a minimum of 2 good walks every week and would like to do a little everyday .
The other day I put on my sweater and thought mmmm last time I wore this it was tight and also my colleague told me I have lost weight . Feel a little bouyed by this . I was miserable for 30 years on and off and now I feel a bit free re food .

Well done cantstopesting01

Hello! How is everyone doing? It's been a while since I've updated due to family bereavement and everything associated with that. The good news is that I've carried on not dieting throughout and I've reached that point of not dieting where my body is finding its natural set point and I'm actually losing weight. It's pretty surprising seeing as I haven't really changed my eating habits and I still have days where I eat and drink too much. I've also found the energy and the enthusiasm to start exercising, mainly doing Youtube videos at home, so I'm toning up too.

That said, I am finding it hard to wrap my head around the fact I'm not dieting ahead of the summer months and going on holiday and I really don't know how confident I'll feel on the beach if I'm not dieting. Anyone else feeling like that?

That's fantastic! Weight loss Yippee!
I'm still at it. On the days that I over eat I have to tell myself that I haven't destroyed it all (to stop myself bingeing cos in the past I would think I'd ruined it all) and that it's only one day. I haven't lost weight but I'm super proud of myself for making it to 5 1/2 months without dieting. I'm also concerned about the summer as I've always refused to wear a one piece swim suit and I'm probably 10-14 lbs more than I'd like to be to wear a bikini. Am so much happier without the bathroom scales. Can't remember where I've hidden them.
Keep up the good work

Five months of no dieting is amazing, Hailthelime! You should be proud of yourself. I think summer is always going to be something that will niggle us former diets because you can't move for 'lose 10lbs in 10 days' diet features and talk about getting a bikini body. So this year I've decided I shall be getting a bikini body - by getting a bikini and putting it on . I've not worn on in over a decade but sod it, life's too short and while I'm still overweight I'm not in bad shape.

Love that! I too am overweight but not in bad shape. Go for it! Super skinny is unattractive so I'd rather be over than under! I ignore every weight loss article or ad now. Faddy diets don't work! X

Well done but some people are naturally very skinny and they look great just as they are too.

Agree Milliy, let's not bash slim people! They often have their own struggles with their size.

I'm just hoping between now and when we go away at the end of July I can keep the positive mindset up and don't end up spending the entire holiday hiding my bikini under a baggy t-shirt!

BookwormMe2 Did you read my latest posts 😊 I've lost weight too. I started walking a mile a day and have lost half a stone and toned up and am now supple again and no stiffness anymore. I eat normally, enjoy my food but stop as soon as satisfied. I'm happy with this.

I've just gone back and read your posts, Milliy, well done! You are my poster girl for giving up diets successfully. I'm still not quite there, but it's a positive work-in-progress.

BookwormMe2 Thank you. When I posted no one was responding and the thread was dead for ages. Glad to have some company again 😂

Milliy We can keep it going between us! I imagine we may have more joiners as we head towards the summer months. The thought of going on a diet to slim down for summer makes me shudder, but lots of people will try and when they slip up (not because of anything they did, but because DIETS DON'T WORK!) we can welcome them with open arms and a giving-up-dieting-is-the-best-thing-you'll-ever-do t-shirt!

Hiya, could I join? I lost 4.5 stone after piling on weight during pregnancy last year. Was really pleased with the loss but then realised I was totally obsessed with food and was starting to really binge (esp on the walk home from SW weigh in, furtively glancing around to check no one from the class saw me! ). I then got into brain over binge as a concept and realised that my fear of putting back on the weight was making me feel completely trapped, anxious and obsessive. And that the diets I've been on all my life have often resulted in this restrictive then bingeing behaviour. I'm currently experimenting with eating what I want when I want. Still journalling food but not Calorie countin. Not sure how successful I've been so far. I've eaten absolutely loads some days! But generally managing to avoid really bad binges. And somehow haven't made any significant weight gain...yet. I think getting used to not restricting myself is going to be a long journey though!

Hello pippitypoppitypoo! (Love that name!) You've come to the right place. Losing 4.5 stone is AMAZING, you should be really proud, but, as you say, after deprivation comes cravings and that's what derails most dieters. I've found learning to relax around food is the best thing I did for my mental health and subsequently my body. I'm finding the weight is slowly coming off now I'm no longer obsessing about it. It does take a long time to get used to not panic into starting a new diet though - a few times I've downloaded a calorie counting app in a panic (esp with summer looming), but after sleeping on it will delete it again!

Hello!

I lost 2.5 stone a few years ago by eating mindfully. I arsed it up by getting out the habit and then trying low carb.

I’m currently breastfeeding my 14 week old which is definitely helping the weight loss!

I refuse to ‘diet’ ever again. I see so many older women, and it’s always women eating shitty ryvita and cottage cheese at lunchtime in the office. Excuse my language but fuck that shit.

Eating mindfully absolutely works so hope you don’t mind if I join you?

Sorry should say I’m about 10st 5 or so and 5ft 1 so ideally I’d like to lose around 1.5stone to get me into the 8s.

Welcome Sexnotgender! This thread isn't about losing weight, it's about overcoming the dieting mentality, so you're on the right track!