I started my day at 6am with a bar and a coffee, I was silly as I didn't need to be in work until 11 so could have had a lie in and spread out my packs. I have also just taken on a more demanding position at work, which means I get phone calls at home when things go wrong, weekends, evenings, early mornings etc. Today was one such morning so an early morning phone call and I was then hungry for my bar
I walked in to work, 3.5 miles, craving a cigarette at every step ( I have had to give up as I am spending too much money on them) maybe doing it at the same time as dieting wasn't a good plan though. Got into work, was jumped on with problems...got to my desk had my tetra pack, and a cup of tea....some water
Started getting an aural migraine, felt weird and weak so had my last pack...and it wasn't even 1pm, My colleague and I normally have lunch together, well we go to Next and shop, today she went with another colleague, realised why! She appeared with sandwiches and crispy crème doughnuts and didn't want to tempt me, then proceeded to eat them in front of me (she did get me a coke zero though).....left work at 5.30, walked the 3.5 mile trek home, craving ciggies and feeling hot and sweaty (wore the wrong thing today)...I almost bent down and picked up an old fag end I spotted on the way home...I stopped myself, horrified at how low I almost stooped … then realised my son still had my door key, I texted him to let me in, but he was out!
At this point, knowing I may be locked out a while, I started to need the loo (as you do), then my DD appeared, let me inside.
My eldest son asked me to go on a walk to the shop with him, when we got there he said he would get me cigarettes with his change (he could tell I was feeling awful and wanted to keep me on my diet)….but he only had £6.00 change so suggested I have the coffee crème cigars instead!!! I politely declined and walked back home with him and his bag of sweets and my bag of nothing.
Feeling hungry and bored and craving so badly, talk some sense into me please (I had my packs too early today)