Busty Babe With GSOH Seeks SW Partner for Weigh-Ins, Bad Jokes & Barely Veiled Self-Loathing

[BlooferLady]

All right, when you've un-cringed from the above -

I'm about to (re-)embark on Slimming World and since I have neither the time nor the funds to go to classes could really do with a coupla pals for those delicious weekly morning weigh-ins. Is anyone interested? I guess it would be ideal if we were all SWing, but it ain't essential. It's the praise or blame I need, alongside willing recipients of lengthy descriptions of the size of my arse .

Few stats (and needless to say we needn't go in for actual weights here)

I lost 3.5 stone a couple of years ago on SW, and have gained about 20lb of that. I KNOW! Silly bint.

As a first step I want to lose 10lb because this will take me into the 'light enough for IVF' category (I have 6 months left before referral for fertility treatment and if not pregnant by then would like to arrive in the pink of health).

After that I would like to lose another 10lb and say 'hello stranger!' to my sad neglected wardrobe of vintage frocks.

Finally, if you are interesting in hanging out, would you mind awfully looking in the mirror and checking that you actually are properly overweight?! Because nothing would depress me more than celebrating getting into a size 16 dress, when everyone else on the thread was lamenting finding their size 10 skinnies a little snug

Right. I'll now sit back and await rejection. Alpine my luvva, if you're reading this do join!

here's my first weigh in!

14st 1lb

I weighed 3 lb LESS than that when I went to slimming world in Feb. Am horrified. But I have diligently written it down in my Little Green Book Of Hope.

Next week I will be able to give you a loss....

Shagged his own dog? Shagged his own dog? Are you sure?

Lots of people shag their dogs - An ex friend of mine did. Came as a bit of a surprise, and never met up with him again. Poor dog kept getting dislocated hips (this thread has sunk so low)

Bet it was a surprise for the dog too!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/big_slim_whatever_weight_loss_club/1173263-tonight-I-confonted-my-demon-I-have-come-back-from-first-slimming-world

There are two lovely newish threads about SW going at the moment - not sure if it is MNish, but should we join together? I figure we can all do with as much help/support as possible.

His own dog, not EVEN kidding. And worse, but I am not posting that because it gives me the sads.

Right, this is a first stab at listification. Hope I got it all round but I assure that is by no means likely . People with 0 for this week are on their first week innit. I have added 2Noisy and MrsF - if either o'yez wanna weigh in tonight and set an interim (or indeed final) target, knock yerselves out and we'll re-do the list . I will put each week's winner at the top of the list but won't order the rest because it'll just get sad for the person at the bottom each week, ie me. If you'd rather max up the spirit of bitter competition then I can do rankings no worries. I am calling it Week Zero a)because when I say that in my head I sound like that deep-voiced feller doing the voiceover for film trailers and b) it puts us all on a leveller footing, like, what with some of us not weighing until next week.

THE BIG FAT LIST: WEEK 0

Stinky Target: -84 Total loss: -4 This week: -4
Bloof Target: -20 Total loss: -1 This week: -4
Colditz Target: -28 Total loss: -0 This week: -0
Pony Target: -20(kg) Total loss: - 1.4kg This week: -1.4kg (3.1lb)
Boo Target: - 14 Total loss: -0 This week: -0
C4ro Target: -12kg Total loss: -0 This week: -0
2Noisy tbc
MrsF tbc

My brain aches. And if there are fewer than 64 mistakes I'll eat my neat little veiled hat.

Ps stinky I'm all for max support - willing to pop head round door aussi, deffo.

So.

What have we all eaten today?

I do so much better when obsessing about food....

I've had 2 eggs, beans, mushrooms and bubble and squeak for brekky
Chicken breast, frylight roast potatoes, carrots, green beans and gravy for late lunch
3 cups of tea with skim milk and 1 sugar
Dinner - to be decided. I'm not hungry yet.

Can you amend my target to -75 please, to reflect the 9lb off the 84 I lost prior to this week? Or have -13 as my total lost (sorry for being picky, honest)

HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR who's spotted my rather brilliant typo?! That should read my loss as 1lb not 4lb [FUCKSTIX]

Sure think Stink - see my above post: I need to redo the fecker anyway. Tell you what let's wait until everyone else has swung by and I'll do all the changes

2 weetabix and free yog
Rice Salad with tinned fish
Lamb with Mediterranean Veg
Too much filter coffee due to no sleep
Not enough fruit

You are doing great Bloof I did not want to mention your loss... but did notice

Hello, hello, kids just gone up so hopefully I'm now able to concentrate a little bit better..........Right, I want to lose 20lbs, which will still make me heavier than when I joined SW the 2nd time round (I think......I too am a serial joiner!) but I figure that it will be a platform for me to take a breath and decide what I want to do then. I have just weighed myself, as this is my starting point, will my first weigh in next week be the first one, if you know what I mean? Am confusing myself..........! Anyway, can I have an interim target of 10lbs, as that'll mean I'm halfway. Bugger, one of the noisy boys shouting, back in a bit

Sorry - YES to obsessing about food.

Breakfast - bircher muesli (HEB)
Lunch - chicken and salad
Dinner - bolognese, cheese (HEA), 'tagliatelli' made of courgette (surprisingly nice!)
I am about to make zabaglione as a weigh-day treat.

Gym: 30 mins interval training (340 cals burned), 10 mins weights.

Tomorrow will be difficult, as I have a Big Work Event so will a)not be able to eat during the day and b) will then drink to much in the evening either to celebrate it going well, or drown my sorrows.

2noisy I'll be poised to cock up do your entry to the list

Just got off scales......had to double check. I'm 12 stone 5 and a half pounds . Thats heavier than when I gave birth to the 2nd noisy boy. Thats a stone heavier than in December. FFS. (Slaps self HARD)

Bloofer lovely list. Would be even lovelier if you could add me onto it when you redo it. I am feeling unloved and unwanted.

Have eaten the following today since Meeting of Doom

toast, scrambled eggs and mushrooms, lots of.
Banana, pear, yogurt
Rice, 2 sausages and the most enormous salad
yogurt and raspberries

DD didn't eat her sausages so I was very brave and gave them to the dogs. Tricky bit of co-ordination required there, as I haven't been able to look the dogs in the eye since the revelations on this thread.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGGHHHHHH!

Ahem. Sorry Only. Look at it like this: Things Can Only Get Better hmmmmnh?!

Am very sorry for despoiling the innocence of your relationship with your doggie

So many jokes about giving the dogs the sausage sprang to mind. So many jokes, so little time.

Oooh, the List is here . I knows that fred Stinky, weighheighheigh/fishandlilacs is my mate in RL. Am all for the joining 2gether but was giving her a bit of virtual space you see.

I have just made a spreadsheet and worked out all my syns. I've eaten fruit and fibre and skimmed milk, bacon and salad sandwich and pasta with red pesto and loads of veg, snacked on grapes, tiny bag of crisps with houmus and one small chocolate. No gym but did do the aforementioned riding and my legs are still aching pleasantly.

I did extra easy today but messed up slightly by eating too much bread. I am so proud that I haven't gone anywhere near butter today though. Stomach is rumbling now- it's snacks I always fall down on, any ideas for easy free ones?

Well done for conquering that there butter addiction boo :)

Easy free snack - I make 'chips'! On a green day spuds obviously, and on a red day carrot or bits of squash, tossed in frylight and cumin and roasted. Then I make a dip of fat free yogurt and garlic. Is nice!

I also like bowls of steamed green veg with pepper and lemon juice over. Home made hummus on a green day is a good bet...

I'm sure there's more! I have an eye on Supersize vs Superskinny - anyone watching?

(PS I'll redo the list just before I go to bed so it's all clean and nice and correct to see us through the week....)

Oh yes, I'm liking the carrot 'chips' idea, thanks muchly, will make some tomorrow, and grab some celery for now.

Oh and eggs! A mushroom omelette or even just a hard boiled egg is quite sort of comforting. On SW I always spend a farking fortune on fruit, because an immense bowl of fruit salad always cheers me up. And I end up sick of MullerLights, but I suppose we all have to focus on the prize (why hello, toes! )