Everyone just hates fat people

[mamabeeboo]

Yes I'm fat and yes I'm taking the WLI.

I've had it out with a friend of a friend during a catch up dinner yesterday and I'm fuming.

I've lost some weight and still have a good 5 or so stone more to go before I'm anywhere near the 'normal' BMI category. So no, I'm not wasting away or disappearing, or losing weight too fast.

The mistake I made was being honest about the jabs. But I stand by it, I think it's important to get healthy, regardless of how you do it, just get there.

ANYWAY, this person has suddenly decided to feel concerned for my health, now that the loss has become noticeable. With some silent nods from others about how you should 'just eat less and move more'. No shit is that what was supposed to do?!

A big discussion about:
just have willpower
just have smaller portions
do it the normal way, you don't know what you're putting into your body
it's not healthy
just put down the fork
it's about dicipline
it's not really losing weight though, is it (huhh??)
it's more rewarding to do it the normal way so you can feel achievement

It's gotten me thinking of how so many people just hate fat people. You want us to pay for being fat, to suffer at the gym doing workouts we don't like or can't do with joint pain and back pain etc. You want us to 'just have willpower' like it's that easy. You want us to try all the diets and fail so you can feel superior with your 'discipline' and that you 'look after your body'.

You hate the fact that these WLI have levelled the playing field.

I said all this yesterday and it became very frosty. These aren't my friends, I was there for the birthday girl, but I won't sit there and take it.

I'm posting because I'd love to hear what you might have heard when talking about WLI. (Or if anyone agrees with the above 🤔)

I am very very proud of your achievements and I don’t even know you! You should be so proud of yourself! Well done 💕

A lot (not all) thin people don’t want their thinness to be accessible to everyone.

I think what you are missing is the fact that those of us on the jabs ARE making those small changes and will continue to incorporate them. The jabs aren't doing the work, we are.

I have conflicting feelings about the new WLIs. I've never struggled a lot with my weight, and when I needed to lose the 1.5 stones I put on during the pandemic I did it through calorie deficit, exercise etc - yes, it was hard and took willpower, but it wasn't an impossibly large target to reach.

However I spent my career working with low fat/diet foods and later in the pharma industry on the early weight loss drugs like Orlistat and I've seen a lot of the background and research into the weight loss industry, and it's grounded in profit, not in a concern for long term well-being or health. The pharma industry doesn't want people to switch to long term healthier lifestyles to manage their weight, they want to lock them into long term drug dependence, as that's how they make money and keep their shareholders happy.

There's a lot of talk in pharma about 'disease awareness' and giving people 'a pill for every ill' . There's also a fundamental conflict between patients only wanting to take the minimum medication to manage their conditions, vs drug companies wanting to maximise their sales.

However I take HRT, and would fight anyone who claimed I didn't need it, and should manage my symptoms with diet and exercise, so I can see the same argument for WLI.

I would strongly urge people to use them as a short term means to a healthy maintenance level though , but not to plan to stay on them indefinitely. Although the required regulatory research has been done, there really isn't enough longitudinal data to know the long term effects (unless you're a rat...)

I work out 6 days a week. My fitness age as a 53 year old woman is 25 according to garmin. I have the ideal amount of visceral fat. I eat all the right foods most of the time . I have had a rough few years and antidepressants have made me put on weight. The injections have quietened my food demons and made me realise what ‘normal’ people feel like around food. I’m not cheating I’m just finally able to eat normally, it’s such a fucking relief.

I think you’re right and I think it’s fair to say what you said. And to be honest, even though I completely agree with your statement, I do sometimes find myself being judgemental about people with weight issues, and what you’ve said makes me feel uncomfortable about that. I have a family member whose weight has dramatically reduced over the past year after taking a WJI privately and she is already happier, healthier and more able to do things she couldn’t before. Sometimes I would judge her when I saw her making dietary and exercise choices that weren’t helping her, but I’m educated enough about weight issues to know they are complex and deep rooted, and that my judgements were irrational and mean - prejudiced even - and I had to work hard to challenge them. From what I’ve read about weight loss drugs (New Scientist recently published a very informative article on WJI) the benefits far outweigh the downsides, and I have high hopes that these new drugs will be game changers for society, saving the NHS money in the long run and underpinning a healthier society, which can only benefit everyone. Perhaps people feel that they want to punish people with weight issues for having an ‘easy option’ and not having to put in the effort they feel they should. But to see the transformation in my relative, both physically and emotionally, I can only say I’m glad to see her so happy, and I’d rather see her like this than begrudge her for finding an ‘easy option’. Good luck with your endeavours OP, and continue to stand up to the ignorant and ill-informed wherever you need to.

Personally I do watch what I eat all the time and work out 5-6 times a week, while on the jabs. Mounjaro doesn't do the work for us, but it helps us keep to a calorie deficit by working on food noise etc. So I am confused about the idea of cheating.

"cheating" is a horrible term. Is getting a gastric by-pass "cheating"?

It might be cheating death / diabetes and heart failure but it's not cheating anything else. What tosh.

"Everyone just hates fat people."
What utter bollocks. Grow up.

Ugh, I'm sorry you're going through this OP. All a good friend should care about is that you're becoming healthier, not how you're doing it (and I don't really buy the 'you don't know what's in that stuff' line tbh, the NHS seems perfectly relaxed about WLI when all's said and done).

I'm on MJ and pretty certain some of my friends would react this way if they knew. One friend asked me directly how I was losing the weight, she's not a judgemental person so I told her, plus another friend I knew wouldn't judge or pretend to be 'worried'. As far as other people go, I'll tell the truth if they asked me directly, otherwise I'm just not bringing it up. Some people are being complete arses about WLI at the moment. I think the perception is we're not 'working hard enough' for the weight loss, which is such a dog-in-the-manger attitude.

FWIW I think you're spot on re levelling the playing field. Hope the rest of the weight loss goes well!

Interesting. On this thread, I have read responses which talk about maintenance doses and also maintaining the changes made whilst on the injections. Not sure where these endless defensive irate people are lurking.

This is more to do with losing weight rather than particularly using the WLI.
But I think there is a general bias in society in how fat people are treated vs slim.
Whether it be sub conscious or not.
I don't particularly blame the folk that think it but you can't deny that it's there.
By slimming down it removes this discrimination so you are on more of a level playing field.

There’s a spiteful type of woman that wants fat people to stay in their lane. You see it on here and in RL.

They can’t be superior or better looking if you get thin, can they?

You’ll hear them say it’s cheating, or we don’t know the long term effects (of GLPs that have been around for decades) 🤨, or, gleefully, you’ll pile the weight back on.

Stick with it OP, and congratulations on the weight-loss so far.

Personally l don't care how anyone loses weight. I have lost nearly 4 stone due to a complete life change of now exercising and being on WW.

To some following WW could be classed as "cheating" as that is given me the support to loose weight.... just like the WLI are supporting those who are taking them.

I have seen a few acquaintances loose many stone plus maintain and I'm so pleased for them as they are safeguarding their own future health. I have also seen a couple who haven't maintained and have piled some weight back on unfortunately.

Those that have kept the weight off have made lifestyle changes...the same as mine i.e exercise and food choices.... so we have all reached our "goal" ...but just in ways that suit us individually.

But let's say that some people indeed have less willpower. They tried, they failed to lose weight with eating less.

Does this mean they should be punished? They are not deserving a normal weight body? I would really like someone to explain me this thinking.

You are right OP. I mean, obviously it isn't everyone - some people are nicer and more enlightened - but as a society a lot of hatred is projected onto people who are overweight. Just remember it's their problem, not yours - they have absorbed the damaging message that to be overweight is something to fear and they are projecting those fears onto you. People are basically brainwashed.

Leave them to it and do what is best for you I say. After all, what you choose to do with your body is no one else's fucking business.

@NeedToAskPlease and I bet not too many people have asked with fake concern what happens when you finish with WW and won't you just pile the weight back on?

Same here. I can think of one ex-friend who would not have been at all happy with my no longer being the fat friend. (Well, I'm still fat, but a lot less so, and I think that would have been quite bad enough in her eyes. 😄)

Yes - people who are insecure want someone else to be 'below' them in some way and so are threatened when they see this changing. These people are to be ignored.

Many people seem dependent on there being fat people around so they can feel superior in some way - they are really going to struggle in this new world 😁

I've lost 31kg on WLI so far.
I'm fairly greagacious and pleasent when I interact with people.
I've found lately people are much more responsive, chatty etc - nicer you might say. Yes, nicer.

I guess many people are very shallow

I think the ‘cheating’ discourse is heavily gendered and sadly often comes from other women. See also c-sections / formula feeding / HRT. All ‘cheating’ according to a certain kind of person. I’ve never heard anyone be accused of cheating for using statins to lower their cholesterol, for example.

It is though. What the injections do is help people eat less.

I’ve lost weight with Mounjaro and people speak to me more, they look me in the eye more. I feel more seen and accepted by complete strangers. It’s really odd the subconscious bias people seem to have that they are probably not even aware of.

You’re absolutely right. The world hates fat people and feels entitled to tell them their opinion, as if they know what they’re talking about. Telling people to eat less as if they’ve discovered some secret cure. Morons.

FWIW using weight loss jabs is fine, I’d trust a doctor over some random idiot. Personally I can’t wait to try them (currently breastfeeding so can’t).

So bloody what? You seem to be implying harder work at weight loss = greater overall worth as a human being, if so that's plain obnoxious. They are healthier, that should be all that matters. You're coming off very self-satisfied and superior in this post, and not like a particularly pleasant human being tbh, regardless how superior you think your 'hard work' makes you.