Everyone just hates fat people

[mamabeeboo]

Yes I'm fat and yes I'm taking the WLI.

I've had it out with a friend of a friend during a catch up dinner yesterday and I'm fuming.

I've lost some weight and still have a good 5 or so stone more to go before I'm anywhere near the 'normal' BMI category. So no, I'm not wasting away or disappearing, or losing weight too fast.

The mistake I made was being honest about the jabs. But I stand by it, I think it's important to get healthy, regardless of how you do it, just get there.

ANYWAY, this person has suddenly decided to feel concerned for my health, now that the loss has become noticeable. With some silent nods from others about how you should 'just eat less and move more'. No shit is that what was supposed to do?!

A big discussion about:
just have willpower
just have smaller portions
do it the normal way, you don't know what you're putting into your body
it's not healthy
just put down the fork
it's about dicipline
it's not really losing weight though, is it (huhh??)
it's more rewarding to do it the normal way so you can feel achievement

It's gotten me thinking of how so many people just hate fat people. You want us to pay for being fat, to suffer at the gym doing workouts we don't like or can't do with joint pain and back pain etc. You want us to 'just have willpower' like it's that easy. You want us to try all the diets and fail so you can feel superior with your 'discipline' and that you 'look after your body'.

You hate the fact that these WLI have levelled the playing field.

I said all this yesterday and it became very frosty. These aren't my friends, I was there for the birthday girl, but I won't sit there and take it.

I'm posting because I'd love to hear what you might have heard when talking about WLI. (Or if anyone agrees with the above 🤔)

Have a halo. We all bow down to you.

What are you trying to understand? What is perplexing you?

Weight loss isn’t some competition though is it? Steroids are only cheating because people take them and then perform better in competitions. They also don’t actively improve health in the same way as WLIs do. We all know that obesity is bad for health. WLIs allow people to beat obesity so I don’t see what the problem is.

So stop being disciplined, eat what you want, don't exercise, gain a ton of weight and then get prescribed the injections so you can get an easy, painless solution to being slim and healthy. What's the problem?

@DurbevillesGirl2 I've been slim (size 6/8) most of my life, and I absolutely don't recognise this description of what it takes to stay at that size:

"This is what’s so annoying! Fat people think thin people are just naturally thin! No. It is years of discipline, painful exercise, missing out on cake you wanted to eat but knew you shouldn’t! I have constant food noise, hunger pangs etc I’d be surprised if you could find someone who didn’t!"

That sounds like a very unhealthy relationship with food. Just as unhealthy as someone who overeats.

I disagree that none of thin people are naturally thin. I know plenty. I've talked to them, especially since starting jabs and the ones I know have all told me that their life is nothing like mine. No, they are not plagued by the constant constant food noise every minute of every day. They do not constantly think and plan what they will eat that day and how they can stay in their calorie allowance - they eat, then stop and don't think about food until it's time to eat again.
My own DH, very slim, always has been - I can assure you he has never said no to cake in his entire life.

But I'm not like that. And yes I've been slim, I've been bit chubby, I've been overweight, many times in my life. I have been fighting my weight - also successfully - my entire life. It's exhausting. Add thyroid issues and perimenopause, and this was clearly a battle I was no longer winning.

All WLI does is that it makes me feel 'normal'. I still need to track what I eat if I want to stay in calorie deficit and lose the weight. I still need to go to gym, which I have also aways done - sorry for not complying with the lazy fattie sitting on sofa stereotype. But now it's manageable.

If you are very slim and find that you are hungry all the time and can't stop thinking about food, it may well be that you are undereating. When you talk about being plagued by food noise and obsessed with food, it sounds like disordered eating.

Many overweight people also under eat and have eating disorders. Obesity is a very complex metabolic disease and it's not at all clear that it's simply down to eating too much and not moving enough.

There is also a huge emotional component. Adhd is a common driver of binge eating disorder, for example. Ptsd from childhood abuse is also well known to often lead to obesity in adulthood. Rape and sexual abuse likewise is correlated with obesity.

It's just not at all simple. Most obese people have done every diet and "lifestyle change" possible and may have lost and regained huge amounts of weight in their life. If WLI help to provide a long term improvement of metabolic health then how can anyone begrudge that?

Lucky luck you.
I can guarantee you, most people who are slim to average size feels like this poster. Crap sugary carby food is every where. At every turn. Unless you and your kids stay in a bubble never letting any of it into your house and getting someone else to do your shopping then you will have to say no. That might be at the supermarket, at a party, a social gathering, a school social, lunch with family / parents, cake sales at school, someone’s birthday at work. Everywhere.
If you can either easily say no, or what you eat doesn’t affect you then fantastic for you. It isn’t like that for the majority of people.
Virtualy everyone has food noise. To stay a normal size I have to be very very careful what I eat in my late 40’s. As do most women! Multiple times a day I am in discomfort from saying no to particular foods that the rest of my family eat (they are younger and luckily for them they don’t have to be careful at all to stay thin)
If I could I would eat sugary crap every day but I can’t. It’s as simple as that. It really is. You say no.
Would you go in to a shop and steal stuff you wanted just because it was there? Would you sleep with a friends husband because you were extremely attracted to him?
People just have no discipline. It’s always the easy way out.
I know, let all sit on the sofa eating what we want all the while injecting ourselves to make us thinner rather than actually doing any of the hard work.
To me it’s just another strand of humans copping out. I know that’s going o annoy people because they ‘believe they’ve done everything and not lost weight’ well sorry to burst your bubble but quite frankly, unless you have a compelling medical reason, no you haven’t ’done everything’
You haven’t taken accountability, you haven’t been disciplined enough, consistently, for long enough.
I sometimes feel that the vision in the film Wal-E gets closer and closer by the year.
Take the jabs - none of my business as you say but that doesn’t get away from the fact that actually the risks taking them are not needed. And you won’t stop people feeling you have ‘cheated’ in afraid

The word 'fact' is taking some abuse there.

If it's the easier way out and life is such a struggle, why not eat all the stuff you want to eat and then use the jabs?

"Would you go in to a shop and steal stuff you wanted just because it was there? Would you sleep with a friends husband because you were extremely attracted to him?
People just have no discipline. It’s always the easy way out.
I know, let all sit on the sofa eating what we want all the while injecting ourselves to make us thinner rather than actually doing any of the hard work."

@PalePinkPeony This is very interesting, the choice of comparison that you have used here. Most people would agree that having an affair with a friend's husband is morally wrong, for reasons that are obvious. Stealing from a shop is morally wrong, and damaging to that business, for reasons that are obvious.

Choosing to over eat is not a choice that affects another person morally in this way. It's not illegal, it's not a cause for legally ending a marriage. Yet you equate it!

You also have absolutely no idea about how WLI work if you think people taking them just sit on the sofa eating what they want whilst still getting thinner. That's just utterly untrue. People need to be in a calorie deficit to lose weight, whether on WLI or not. WLI make that possible for people who have previously not managed it consistently. I have eaten in a calorie deficit for 10 months plus now. Why do you think that I'm sitting on the sofa eating whatever I want?

Maybe it's been asked and answered but what test/game/competition am I cheating at?

When people say it's cheating what do you mean?

Reading some of the more obviously ridiculous, panicky contributions from posters on this thread, it's clear that obese people are not the only ones who often have disordered attitudes to food. The fear and resentment that the social value of thinness is being eroded every day shines out from some of these posts. They know. They can see the way the wind is blowing.

Now I do actually have some sympathy for people who have been made to feel like their worth is in their struggle to stay thin, and would be willing to treat them with kindness... right until they start trying to make that the problem of people who are treating their obesity via WLI. They can't help thinking like this, but they can help vocalising it.

Such people do need to understand that if they insist on going down this road, they're going to be met both online and IRL with some responses they don't like. It might be wise to reflect on whether forcing this issue is ultimately going to be beneficial to them.

I think we’ve hit everything on the bingo card now? Are we missing any?

they mean we fatties do not 'deserve' to be slim and this is cheating naturally slim people out of their more superior position in the pecking order.

@PalePinkPeony I understand what you're saying about discipline, but the PP was describing having constant hunger pains and obsessing about food, even suffering. That's neither normal nor healthy.

You do realise you just shot down any credibility your post might have had by parading your ignorance in thinking people on WLI inject so they can continue ‘stuffing themselves’, right?

Not everyone has the same WLI experience, but personally on 10mg of Mounjaro I have to work at actually eating enough to stay healthy, never mind stuffing my face with sugary crap. Not wanting/being able to eat as much, or eat the same foods, as before, is kind of the point ffs. 🙄

At least get your facts right before you insult people.

There was a time when people were repulsed by thin bodies as it signalled being poor - to be fat was admired as it meant you could afford food. So it's nonsense that it is inherent to dislike a certain body shape - these things are about status and class.

I’m so glad I have only told 2 people about my wli s. I am also glad I am losing weight and won’t have to endure the fat shaming evidenced on this thread.

I’m not the unhealthy one here. You just don’t want to admit it’s your lack of discipline that made you fat and like to imagine you have some special gene or reason for being fat. Not every hunger pang has to be indulged and every craving given into.

stop @ me because I will never share the same views and mindset as fat people evidently.

Maybe (like me so im seeking education) they don't understand...what does wli offer that diet and exercise don't?

Everyone else has to have will power and exercise to stay in shape. For me, that’s why the jabs annoy me. They are a cheat to continue your lazy lifestyle that is off limits to everyone else.

And this is it, isn't it.

If you haven't struggled with your weight, and I don't mean struggling to get those last few pounds off, then you have no idea.

I honestly don't care if people think I'm "cheating" by taking WLI. Is it hurting them? Does it have anything other than a positive impact, as I'm less likely to have to use NHS resources as I age as an obese person?

You don't like me fat, but when I make real inroads to not be fat, suddenly it's NOT LIKE THAT!!!!

Here is an intereresting article for people saying we're all the same and if you struggle with your weight, you're just weak and lazy.
https://www.statnews.com/2021/09/13/how-a-fatally-tragically-flawed-paradigm-has-derailed-the-science-of-obesity/
The auhtor argues that "Obesity is not an energy balance disorder, but a hormonal or constitutional disorder, a dysregulation of fat storage and metabolism"

If you’re going to voice opinions you know will be offensive to some, I think it’s a bit much asking people not to tag you when challenging said opinions. Are you also one of those people who says offensive things while walking out of a room because you can’t cope with being challenged?

Hear, hear. 👏

Cultural anomalies or societally imposed ideologies can sometimes override evolutionary instincts to some extent, but never eliminate them. The natural evolutionary instincts of all mammals is to choose a mate who looks healthy. That is ingrained by millions of years of evolution. It’s also why people find symmetrical faces more “beautiful”. There are a lot of subconscious processes where the brain uses physical characteristics as a proxy for health and therefore greater chances of survival in terms of mating. Of course that applies only to the selection of a partner, though, not to how people who are not being considered as a potential mate are perceived in general when someone meets them in any other context than seeking a partner.

I’m sure most people in the modern world don’t spend the majority of their time assessing people as potential mating partners so mostly people will be fairly oblivious to the physical appearance of the people they interact with in daily life, unless it is very far outside the norm (or they are a teenager, whose developing brains are trying to cope with puberty and are also wired to make constant comparisons with peers because they are in the developmental stage where they are transitioning away from family to their peer group being their main focus of social structure and identity, therefore a huge focus on “fitting in” and being accepted by peers comes to the fore).

It’s quite sad that so many adults seem to be spending so much time worrying what others think of their appearance when in reality, unless you’re dating or they’re a close friend or family member they’re very unlikely to notice much, unless you go out in fancy dress! It would be far better to just focus on the health aspects rather than conflate a medical issue with some sort of social value or self-worth.