Kids who annoy you

[roseandviolets]

Yawning Kid.

Yawning Kid gives a huge, loud roaring noise as he yawns. (This species is usually male.) You have to stop speaking to allow Yawning Kid to finish his yawn. You suggest nicely to Yawning Kid that he yawns quietly, and covers his mouth in future. Yawning Kid looks around in absolute disbelief st his friends. "I was only YAWNING," mutters Yawning Kid. "Oh my GOD. Can't even YAWN in 'ere any more ..."

Fuck off, Yawning Kid.

Sensitive Susie.

"Right everyone! Books out, please!"
"Ohhhh," whispers Susie. "Don't SHOUT."

(Sensitive susie has no SEN. Sensitive susie manages to listen without screwing her face up during the deputy heads rants about the inappropriate graffiti in the boys' toilets. Sensitive susie can screech like a banshee. She's just being a pain.) Sensitive Susie is usually female.

Thespian Theo.

Theo knocks his leg against a desk or a chair, or is elbowed by accident by another kid. Thespian Theo yelps loudly and ostentatiously, shrieking and holding the offending body part in "agony." Thespian Theo will often ask for a wet paper towel or claim he cannot possibly write (even if the affected area is thespian Theo's testicles.) Theo is usually male.

Beautiful Beth

Beth is a lovely looking girl. Or, she was in Y7. Now she is in Y9 and is orange and black. She looks at her own face most of the time, either through a mirror or a phone. She brushes her hair constantly. She wears so much Victoria secret perfume that should missing, an average hound could probably track her down within sixty seconds. When you ask Beth to stop putting on her makeup, you get a vague 'huh? Oh ... In a minute!' Beautiful Beth is female. But occasionally her counterpart, Handsome Hugh, will have an elaborate hairstyle.

Touchy Tina

Tina gets a bottle of Pepsi out. You gently remind her fizzy drinks aren't allowed in school. 'Oh my GAWWWWD!' thunders Tina. "This school is per-feck-TICK!"
A group of girls are talking and you say their names - 'Girls? Anna, Tina, Jessica?'
'Oh my god, just pick on ME all the time doncha? Oh my GOD and it wasn't even me TALKIN. Everyone else is talkin' -' (Tina gesticulated to the now silent classroom) 'but yer just pick on ME!'

(This is light hearted and one day I will write about amazing annabel, wonderful William, hilarious Harry, beautiful (inside as well as out) Beatrice.)

But share yours: I need a larf!

You can be annoyed all you want, just don't expect to be annoyed in public without people criticising you for it. Do you honestly think you can just slag off children without people disagreeing with you? That's Numpty Nancy for you.

You annoy me, that's pretty obvious, maybe it's Simple Sadie

Me personally?

That's a bit harsh.

My examples were definitely not SEN examples. Roadman Rory in the corridor. Gangsta Gavin.

My son with no pen.

The boy who tries to catch you out over the homework and spectacularly fails.

Anyway, I am off to fill in seven exam concession investigation forms - because you know, I want to support the annoying, lovable, irritating, lively, vulnerable young people I teach.

I was really enjoying this, I thought great wow, it’s Mumsnet and nobody has posted the usual complaining and what about sen.

But it’s Mumsnet isn’t it?

That boy with the homework had classic ADHD symptoms but as was published in a national report on 2nd October- teachers have little to no understanding of ADHD and have a fixed mindset about it.
Wonder how much you would enjoy your pupils making fun of you?

I have You're Always Picking On Me Youssef.

Today, I asked about 6 students to stop crowding around me & sit down so I could go through their course work enquiries efficiently, one at a time & - this is relevant - in alphabetical order.

Youssef went into full OMG SO UNFAIR PICKING ON ME WHY AM I LAST ALWAYS OMG for a full minute. Ended up backing slowly away from me, hands over his ears & shouting NONONONONO PICKING ON ME AGAIN.

Youssef is the most able boy in Year 11 & will get a grade 9 without breaking a sweat.

Zak & Zoe think Youssef is a dick.

I’m not a teacher, but I have one adult daughter with learning difficulties, one sonwith adhd and another boy currently living with me who has very severe adhd. Plus gangsta gavin- my stepson.

If their teachers are posting on here to let off steam good for them. Better than taking to drink

Bloody hell, they do it all the time!!!!

He does not have classic ADHD symptoms. he is a potential A grade A level students who is an idle idle boy.

If I believed he had SEN symptoms I would have flagged it believe me. I know him FAR better than you and it is deeply condescending to suggest that I could not spot the signs.

I should add that I am often the first to call people out on unkind language or labelling language in my professional life. Here I am being a little unprofessional for a release. Dearie me.

But then I'm from Scotstoun. What would I know?.

Pink you may be referring to my friends DD!
Yr 8 girl who once she starts laughing just cannot stop

I have ADHD (completely undiagnosed at school) and I don't find it offensive. I can laugh at myself. I know I am annoying. I know that people need to let off steam about that. I probably irritated my teachers at school too - in fact I do have painful memories of this happening but to me it doesn't feel the same as this kind of lighthearted joking along in a thread. The teachers who had issues with me were not humorously exasperated on a Friday afternoon, they thought I was lazy, and kept trying to work with me with little results because none of us really knew what the root problem was. Now I'm a teacher myself, I can see a clear difference between students who exhibit annoying behaviour (like all children do, like our own children, like even adults do, anyone you spend a lot of time with) and students who are really struggling, who only the most heartless teacher could find it in them to joke about.

I've also spotted classic ADHD symptoms here BTW but I didn't find it problematic in the same way, I gave a wry smile. Teachers can't be expected to be an expert on every single disorder, sadly enough. It would be wonderful if they were superhuman and could, though.

I'm enjoying myself in the staff room AND have a child with ASD and undiagnosed yet possibly requiring surgery muscular problems.

Nothing wrong with affectionally describing people's personalities - some parts of which may get on your tits at times. Ds certainly gets on mine! No different to the "what does your DH do that gets on your wick" threads. Doesn't mean all the posters are yelling 'he's a dick and I need to Ltb!'

As you all were .....

Most people these days are coming to learn that it is not OK to be sexist in the ‘locker room’

By the same token it is not OK to be disablist in ‘the staffroom’.

It’s all about power and control.

Bertie, just because you are ok with teachers not giving you what you deserved does not mean you should be an apologist for those that continue to fail children with ADHD. You might not mind being failed but everyone else does, ffs havevacwird with yourself!

Wonder how much you would enjoy your pupils making fun of you?

Sorry but this made me

So Milngavieghirl are you saying that every person out there who has less than perfect personalities must have ADHD? Surely but their very definition kids can be quite annoying sometimes?

Also - by assuming that every child who presents with less than desirable behaviour has undiagnosed ADHD then you are also assuming every child with a neuro developmental disability has undesirable behaviour.

My ds teachers know what behaviours are because of his asd - doesn't mean they don't annoy them and me - or that they don't do their best to help him develop skills.
I can also tell you that despite all this they actually adore him and all say what a delight he is. Despite him telling most of them to fuck off at least once

What utterly disgusting comments from the two posters with no understanding of ADHD at all! I hope you have no contact with children given your quick to judge and label comments. Despicable!

What utterly disgusting comments from the two posters with no understanding of ADHD at all! I hope you have no contact with children given your quick to judge and label comments. Despicable!

Who? Are you talking about my post. Just to clarify, when I said that by their definition 'kids' can be annoying I meant just that - kids in general, not children with ADHD.

Unless you are just looking for offence when it's not there? Hmmmmmm?

I teach adults and my pet peeve is Greek Chorus Gary.

Of the species male who insists on giving a running commentary/ongoing feedback/own opinion on what I'm saying.

Constantly interrupting with, "Oh, yes, you're right about that", "I'd agree with you on that one", and repeating back what I just said in exactly the same words.

Greek Chorus Gary tries to co-facilitate discussions and group exercises. He also likes to remind us that we're approaching a tea break (in case the huge tea trolley being wheeled in hadn't been enough of a prompt). He usually elicits lots of rolled eyes and exchanged looks from the rest of the tribe.

I spend the day feeling either like a goldfish or speaking so intently and earnestly because I'm trying not to be interrupted that I get on my own nerves.

I always thought that diagnoses had to be done by experts with careful examination of the child in question so it's quite astonishing, tbh, to find that people can do it based on a couple of lines of jokey caricaturing.

I was Yawning Kid. I'm physically incapable of yawning quietly. I try to suppress yawns in public as much as possible (but it is especially hard when you are the only person in the classroom with an IQ above 100, crabby teacher included obviously).

The rest sound like real twats but you have forgotten Lazy Lucy/Lucian.

Lazy Lucy and her male counter part Lazy Lucian are trouble. They are disruptive, disrespectful and never seem to be doing any work (until you ask to see it and it all seems to be miraculously done). They have a subtle sneering tone (so subtle that you are not sure whether they are actually doing it on purpose or just victims of bad vocal genetics). They are also the top student in every single class.

I think fuck off, Yawning kid is one of my favourite mumsnet comments ever.
It’s rare to find a staffroom thread that doesn’t talk about wanting to give up or dreading another Monday coming to the point that a minor car accident would seem like a nice rest. These are (mostly) affectionate jokes from the chalkface, told by people who spend their days trying to make life better for those children.

SOrry ttbb, unfortunate cross post!

MN is full to bursting of people slagging teachers off, I might add...

Definitely telltale Evil

Love the orange and black female whose skirt is way too short usually

Remember the penguin boys who waddled as their trousers were too low with boxers showing