Harry & Meghan - what does the future hold?

[Bluejumperdog]

I’m not really sure whether I can articulate this very well, but I’ll give it my best shot.

I think I support a route for Harry and Meghan to find a route back into the fold of the royal family, and find that odd and conflicting given everything that has happened.

I found the Oprah interview, the freedom flight, the Spare revelations awful. It felt really unpleasant the way Meghan came into the royal family, was active for so little time and then criticised it all so publicly and in a way that seemed a bit of a cultural miss (I’m not referring to the racism allegations here). I think that her American mindset perhaps did not fully understand the tacit consent nature of the royal family and the constitutional delicacies with which the titles are held. This is why it makes commercialisation and speaking at round tables about ‘power’, jarring.

However, despite ALL of this this, I see two human beings. One man who has grown up, without any consent, in a strange institution, in the glare of the spotless, completely traumatised by the death of his mother in horrendous circumstances when he was a young boy. A veteran too. Although not comparable to this, Meghan clearly has also had a dysfunctional childhood too. These latest revelations around her father mean that from the outside, none of us really know what’s going on.

I would like them all to just be happy. I feel like collectively it would be awesome as a nation if we could give the family the framework to sort it all out by just saying ‘look, H&M, you did some crazy shit, it was hugely damaging and cruel. But we understand that you guys have gone through crap too. Let’s look forward- try and sort it out’.

I’d honestly like to be done with the drama and for everyone to just get on. Does anyone else feel like this? I know it doesn’t really work like this in practice, I’m just trying to get across how I’m feeling.

Please also try and be a bit kind in your responses. I think this is coming from a place where everything just feels really negative/heavy in life at the moment and the need for some positivity,

I don’t think there’s any way the RF could have them back, even if on a personal level they wanted to, which they definitely don’t. They are so unpopular, so demonstrably unsuited to serving the country, Meghan using photos with sick children and survivors of a terrorist atrocity to sell clothes, now using this story about child abuse to advertise her candles and bookmarks, Harry the drug user and racist embarrassing himself with his geopolitical pronouncements, slapping the arses and tweaking the nipples of strangers, squeezing as much money out of his mother’s death as possible. They have deliberately undermined the RF and its senior members for years, sharing all sorts of private information about others while whinging about their own privacy. They are both proven liars, having both lied in court. Harry accused a judge of corruption. They claimed the Archbishop of Canterbury had performed an illegal marriage.

The RF already have their work cut out managing Andrew. Charles and William want a smaller set up. There’s absolutely nothing for the RF to gain by allowing these two back, even if they liked them.

There is no rehabilitating these two. Ever.

They've shown themselves to be egotistical money hungry lazy wasters, who will use sick children and wounded veterans to their own gain.

Im at the point ever since the Andrew stuff thay we need to grt rid of the monarchy now. Too many cover ups, no accountability etc. I would be happier having to vote for someone evrybr or 5yrs whatever the right time is and then being more accountable and transparent to us. We don't need their partner or children or any other family members to be involved either. Just one person who do the job of hosting state dinners and so on. This illusion of the monarchy being good completely shattered now imo.

I don't think there is any way back for them now. They're too far gone.

The RF cannot afford to give them another chance as the consequences could be horrendous when they fall off the rails again. I don't think there's a desire to re establish relations either. Suspect they're following the old adage of 'when someone shows you who they are believe them'.

I think only working royals should hold titles. The best thing would be to remove their titles and let them live as private citizens as they stated they wanted to be.

I also think H&M will end up getting divorced in the next few years and it will be extremely messy. I feel very sorry for the kids because they are the innocent ones in all this and will have to deal with the fall out. I hope they don't end up like Hollywood celebrity offspring, bouncing from drugs to rehab never knowing where they fit. That would be very sad.

The only way Harry and Meghan can be welcomed back in the family they would need to live a quiet life. No press, no silly pretend walk abouts.
None of these they will do.

I don't support a route for them back into the heart of the Royal family. They have proved themselves untrustworthy and manipulative. The Royals will never be able to trust that a private conversation won't be mined for headlines and I think William in particular is right to be aggrieved at the way Harry trashed their sibling relationship – he called him his arch nemesis! Why would you ever want to be close again with someone who views you so negatively and puts themselves in constant competition with you?

I think the way their comms team is handling this Thomas letter story might be their ultimate downfall. There are so many holes in M's version and if the Met's internal inquiry reveals no letter ever existed, she'll never come back from it.

All very fair comments! I know the practical realities are that this is probably all far too complex to unpick and resolve. I just think it’s very sad for all involved (though not without fault).

I actually understand where you’re coming from, and I don’t think wanting reconciliation is necessarily at odds with being critical of Harry and Meghan. I don’t think they’re inherently bad people, and I can absolutely understand wanting everyone to move forward and find some happiness. But I think the biggest obstacle to that happening is the way they seem to approach things publicly.

I think a lot of the damage could have been avoided if they’d had better advice and stopped feeling the need to clap back at everything they didn’t like. The Oprah interview, Spare and the constant public commentary created so much unnecessary division. And even now, they seem unable to resist correcting the narrative, making digs at the Royal Family or the press, or positioning themselves in opposition to William and Catherine. There always seems to be a need to prove something rather than just get on with their lives.

Take the Thomas Markle situation. His alleged crimes have nothing to do with Meghan, and she isn’t responsible for his actions. The first part of her statement was perfect PR, but then she felt the need to explain that she’d known about the allegations for years and take another dig at the media to justify her estrangement from her father. Now she’s become part of the story, and people are questioning her knowledge and actions. It’s another example of how the need to control the narrative can end up creating an entirely new problem.

I also think they lean too heavily into their victim narrative. Harry and William both lost their mum in horrendous circumstances, and I have enormous sympathy for what both boys went through. But William seems to have channelled that into a more positive experience by carrying on Diana’s legacy through his work with Centrepoint and his efforts to tackle homelessness through Homewards. Harry has done some valuable work too, particularly with Invictus, but his public narrative often seems to return to his trauma, his grievances and what he feels the institution did to him. There’s a difference between acknowledging your experiences and allowing them to define your entire public identity.

I feel similarly about Meghan and Catherine. Meghan is entitled to speak about her experiences, and we’ll never know the full story of what happened behind closed doors. But so much of her public narrative seems to centre on how badly she was treated and drawing attention to her own suffering (“nobody has asked me if I’m okay” or “I’m the most trolled person in the entire world”). Catherine, meanwhile, has faced years of scrutiny and a cancer diagnosis, yet has used her experience to raise awareness of cancer, connect with patients through hospital visits and support cancer charities through things like the Three Peaks Challenge. Alongside this, she continues to champion her early years campaign, focusing on how our experiences in childhood shape the rest of our lives. Rather than allowing her own difficulties to define her public role, she seems to use her platform to shine a light on wider issues and help others. Neither woman owes the public a particular way of dealing with hardship, but I do think the way they choose to present themselves publicly inevitably influences how people perceive them.

Harry and Meghan could have built a really strong identity around their charitable work and the causes they care about. Instead, so much of the attention continues to revolve around their personal brand, their grievances and their relationship with the family they left. There also seems to be an unnecessary need to compete with William and Catherine, as though one couple’s success has to come at the expense of the other. I wish they’d just let each other get on with things.

That said, I don’t think reconciliation is impossible, and I agree that constantly rehashing everything helps nobody. But I think it would require more than everyone simply deciding to move on. There would need to be accountability, genuine private conversations, boundaries and a willingness to stop litigating family disagreements in public, and ultimately I just don’t think Meghan and Harry are capable of that. They first need to recognise their own role in the situation and stop creating unnecessary problems for themselves.

Sometimes the best PR is knowing when to say nothing, when to stop clapping back and when to let the work speak for itself.

I don’t think it’s possible. My instinct is that the King wants it and is trying to manoeuvre them back in behind the scenes but I’m not convinced it’s what either MM or H really want. They want the perks but not the responsibilities.

I don’t think they’ll stay long in the UK, it isn’t home for either of them any more.

Sorry about the lengthy post

TLDR: I don’t think Harry and Meghan are bad people, and I’d love to see reconciliation, but their constant clap backs, need to control the narrative and victim mentality create unnecessary drama. They need to stop competing with the Royal Family, take accountability and focus on their charitable work rather than their grievances. Sometimes the best PR is knowing when to say nothing and letting your actions speak for themselves.

I agree with the posts above. They can't be let back in to the private fold as the trust is gone. Too many private incidents have been aired. So if they can't be relied on or trusted what's the point?

I also think too many people in the UK now have a bad impression of their personalities. Their good work for charities or causes could give the impression of being done for reasons of PR. This is because theyve blurred the lines between their personal lives and issues and their work. Unlike the RF. And unlike how Harry was seen before he got together with Meghan and decided to tell everyone his thoughts, which has not been good for his image. He was greatly loved before..perhaps we just loved the image not the real Harry who appears a lot less attractive. It's a great shame. He's lost a lot and will probably not achieve what he could have in life now.

I don't think they'll ever be back in the RF.

The King knows his years are numbered with aging years and poorer health and will be ensuring a smooth transition for the next King. PrinceOW would never reconcile after everything H put in his book plus accusing PrincessOW of being racist in his earlier book draft that was convienently leaked.

Honestly @Bluejumperdog i think talking to people about M+H in real life is the way to go. Most people I know have mixed emotions about most of the Royals excluding Andrew who seems to have killed off any support he might have had by his actions. The internet is full of bots as H+M attract bot posts than most so you use won’t really get decent meaningful replies to this post.

I can't see a re-entry for them on any terms but they'll be very well looked after as all royals are however disgraced or disgraceful.

No come back into royal family
A divorce

I know no one who supports them (should they come up in conversation). It was how they treated Harry's grandparents that really did it for them. Can't really come back from that.

@Bluejumperdog “I’d honestly like to be done with the drama and for everyone to just get on. Does anyone else feel like this? I know it doesn’t really work like this in practice, I’m just trying to get across how I’m feeling”

NGL, I find this really odd. I’m sure they are consumed by the drama, but why are you consumed by it? You sound really emotional. Being emotional about the lives of strangers doesn’t seem quite right.

I am definitely someone who wants a happy ending. I feel really sorry for everybody involved and I hope they can work it out.

But you sound massively invested. I know there are crazy people around who just enjoy hating (and I think it’s awful that Harry and Megan have suffered so much with that). It doesn’t sound like you’re one of them unless you’re just trying to start another thread in a different way.

So why do you find this so important? You talk about being done with the drama, why do you know so much about it that it becomes a drama? If it’s the TV, switch it off. I don’t get why someone would waste energy on this.

Life is full on and tiring and so on… I can’t imagine adding all this into what’s going on in your head

I suspect an approach to reconcile, in which the Sussexes agreed to keep it private and not ever discuss it in the media might be received more favourably than the tv interviews stating how it’s someone else’s fault it hasn’t happened….

Private family clearing of the air - maybe.

Public welcome back to your old job with open arms whilst still making cash off your royal profile? Nope.

I was at my craft group on Thursday, so before the story about M's father broke. Most of the group are over the age of 50 and are generally supportive of the Royal Family.

The subject of H&M was discussed for a short while and no-one was supportive of them. They were perplexed by the mock royal engagements in Nottingham the week before and the constant need for them to be in the news.

There has been a feeling, discussed quite a few times, that if H&M had gone and lived quietly in Canada they wouldn't have got themselves into all the financial and publicity issues and could have been included in family occasions

But, having said so much in the Oprah interview and in Spare, those words cannot be undone. And one elderly lady said that seeing M do the mock curtsy took away the last bit of support she had for M

My own feeling is that all trust between the working Royal Family and H&M has gone and will never be regained. I think it's highly likely they have significant financial issues and the dilemma for KC is whether to keep giving them sufficient financial assistance with an agreement not to publish another book or to cut them off financially altogether (which, I am sure, PW will do when he becomes King)

I do think the latest revelation may help to explain how Meghan became the person she is.

But she and Harry both seem to be such damaged individuals I don't think there is a place for them in public life.

Another dig at the media? the same media who have written awful articles about her from being estranged from her father. 🙄 yeah to bloody right so she should.

It's not going to happen. H & M have highlighted all the issues with the royal family and it's incredibly fucked up back room machinations. I'm not fans of any of them, but it's a shame that they are all part of an incredibly toxic system, especially for this born into it.

I think when you resign from a job, you can’t continue to enjoy its benefits or expect to get it back. Life is a one-way journey and they need to move forward, learn lessons from their mistakes and regrets, then make better decisions.

They are now, of their own choosing, private individuals who are closely related to the royal family and have aristocratic titles, but they are not part of the royal fold.

With that in mind, I would advise them to live an entirely private life for a good five years or more. This means choosing a private career. I’m sure Charles would find any education or training required and any shortfall in reasonable day-to-day living costs to help them succeed in a new private career.

Before doing that, however, I think they’d do well to publicly acknowledge how badly they messed up, how they lashed out because they couldn’t have their cake and eat it, how they told lies about Harry’s family and the British public and how they convinced themselves these lies were true. They should say they now understand that the Sandringham agreement was reasonable, that their paranoia was unfounded and that they deeply regret the hurt they caused to so many people, including Harry’s grandparents and his brother and Catherine.

In essence, they need to make an unreserved apology, then vanish and do something worthwhile for a good chunk of time. Maybe until their kids have grown up.

i have to ask op. why start tis thread? it will just go the way any thread about them goes.
it will not be positive.....see pp.

It's sad to watch two damaged people bring out the worst in each other, and in public for all to see. As the monarch is head of state, it's not simply a matter of whether they should be brought back into a family: it's also a matter of whether they pose a threat to the state. The security services will know whether they do. Even as a member of the public, it's clear that their unpredictability, lack of boundaries and hunger to be in the spotlight are qualities that mean they do pose a risk.