Was King Charles wrong to take a rose from Charles Spencer's bouquet?

[OneLilacHedgehog]

Charles Spencer says as Diana's coffin was lowered into the ground, several people there dropped flowers on the coffin. King Charles took a rose from Charles Spencers bouquet and dropped it on Diana's coffin.

This struck me as it shows a very casual disregard for other people's feelings. This was Charles Spencers flowers, but without a thought, king Charles took mine of the flowers. And remember relationships were extremely strained between the two men.

Sometimes I think the smallest incidents like this can reveal someone's true character. It's like someone being rude to a waiter. The king just acts like no one else matters except what he wants.

And bills…

I get weary of the brood mare cliche and I think it's often hurled at the RF but I think the Spencers, or at least Johnny Spencer, thought very much along those lines.

Reminds me of a rift in my own family, apparently someone had said something unkind to her younger sister at their mother's wake, it concerned the quality of the catering I think. This carried on for 50+ years and the offender was always known as Bloody Name, I thought it was a bit like Bloody Mary from history until I discovered the cause.

They sound far worse.

Certainly Johnny Spencer held that opinion, his poor wife had to carry on breeding until she produced an heir, male of course.

Because he knows that Squatties will buy it and that the old adage will come true.
"A fool and his money are soon parted"

We need to remember just who Chucky is; a man who brings his mistress to his sister's funeral. Leaves the rest of the women at home.

Next to that, KC taking a flower from Chucky's bouquet and Chucky having hissy-fit over it shows just how petty CS has always been.

He was so, so jealous of his sister that he treated her like dirt for close to 15 years. His misogyny was on full display and luckily, Diana didn't tolerate it. She knew what kind of person CS was and it was no one to admire.

But he misses her every day. He told Laura in the exclusive interview.

Most definitely, in the treatment of his first wife.

The more I hear about the Spencers the more I understand why Diana was so insecure.

Also, Charles Spencer's first wife.

I used to work with someone like OP.

Most people would just be getting on with stuff and yet this person would manage to find something extremely offensive in the most innocuous of actions or comments. And she would then go on about, trying to get us all to agree with her that it was highly offensive, when no-one but this colleague gave a damn, and hadn't even noticed the 'disrespect'.

She was just very insecure and bristly and if she didn't get het up about something every day, she felt disappointed.

It was exhausting.

It's such a strange way of looking at things, always searching for the worst meaning.
A flower cast into a grave 29 years ago, causing so much anger, stress and opprobrium.
I genuinely don't get it.

@jeffgoldblumi dont think the OP has started as many threads threads as you have. Just saying 🤷‍♀️

I think it’s righteous Indignation- and very performative, both on the part of Spencer and OP.

it reminds me of the people who get cross around Rememrance Sunday with people who for one reason or another, aren’t wearing a poppy. I have great respect for the occasion but every year I buy one and within a day or so it’s either lost or broken.

The BBC have their people wearing poppies for a fortnight before the date, which I think is inappropriate but I guess it’s because they’ve had complaints from people like OP.

...and that's an annual event!
This is an extreme reaction to a one off 29 years ago!

Simultaneously, all at the same time in the space of a day or two!!! 😁 , nah op has me beat….i prefer one at time!

I'm new to the RF board.
Your obsession with shit the RF do is bizarre

There were very few ways Prince Charles could get it right in the circumstances. For fear of being branded a hypocrite, he had to hold back on drawing any attention to his own complicated grief. In that moment, though, he was moved to make an ostensibly courtly gesture. Had he been on good terms with Earl Spencer, it would have been fine. Nobody would have given it a second thought.

However, I don't think it was about the rose in itself for the Earl. It was what it represented, the symbolism of the rose, which the Earl felt Prince Charles was not entitled to.

From what I have read, Prince William is the one most entitled to the symbolism of the rose with respect to Diana. Not the then Prince Charles. Not Charles Spencer. Diana said William was the only man who had never let her down. You could argue he was far too young to be placed in the position of surrogate protector but it cannot be denied he was the most chivalrous of them all, passing notes under the bathroom door to a tearful Diana saying, heartbreakingly, 'I hate to see you sad'.

The bathroom notes was one incident by the way. It's common for children who love their mother to try and comfort her if she cries. I am sure many of us here have had a similar experience.

I have never felt entitled to touch someone elses bouquet at a funeral. It's only flowers, but can be so important at the time.

How do you know how many times William passed notes under the bathroom door to his mum? Surely only the two of them would know that.

I mentioned the bathroom incidents as an example but, from what Diana said, this was representative of his behaviour towards her more generally. I don't think it was fair that he was a parentified child, but I don't wish to detract from the maturity he displayed.

I agree it was very triggering for Charles Spencer. Maybe Prince Charles should have realised? I'm not sure. I tend to want to forgive them all given the circumstances!

No Diana did not say that William often comforted her.

Diana mentioned one incident. If it was a regular occurrence she would have said.

Plenty of mums on here gave mentioned getting upset once and their children trying to comfort them or make it better. Most mums have cried 8n front of their children or within their hearing once in their life.

While I agree that William does not stand alone as a paragon of virtue in this respect, and that there are other non-royal children engaging in similar behaviour, I think it's fair to mention nonetheless that he behaved thoughtfully towards his mother habitually, by all accounts, in contrast to some of the older males in her life. I'm not a royalist but don't mind saying this!

Where / when did she mention this single incident? I can find various tellings of this story, eg Paul Burrell saying it would happen “whenever Diana was upset”, but none from Diana herself.

In her TV interview. Paul Burrell is not a reliable narrator.