Just finished 'Spare'...

[HerReputationMadeItDifficultToProceed]

… and I encourage anyone who’s even vaguely interested in this story to give it a read. Especially if what’s been leaked has made you at all angry, because I think in context everything makes a lot of sense.

I wasn’t a Harry and Meghan hater before reading this, but I wasn’t a fan girl either. Like many Brits, I find a lot of Americans- especially West Coast Americans- quite irritating and Meghan firmly falls into that camp for me. I’m sure she’s nice enough, but she’s very American and very perky and much like Wednesday Addams, I don’t do perky. However, I suspect that her intentions and generally good and that like most of us she’s got good and bad qualities. She’s clearly ambitious and I think that she probably initially dated Harry based on that ambition and on getting a platform, although I think that she genuinely loves him now.

The ghost writer has done a great job at capturing Harry’s personality I think; he comes across as introspective and thoughtful but funny and bright.

I think that Harry has a good soul; I think that he’s kind and has had a hard time of it growing up. I also think he’s a bit clueless and naive and has been in a bubble, but I think he acknowledges that and wants to understand and change. Undoubtedly losing his mother at the age he was had more of an outward impact on him than it had on William. He’s also been a victim of his dad’s wishywashy parenting. It sounds like- and looks like to me from my vantage point as a normal citizen who knows bugger all except what I’ve seen in the media- that Charles has been there for his kids to an extent, but not in a hands on or especially useful way. It also seems clear that Charles has always put Camilla first. From almost the moment Diana died it seems that he wanted, above everything else, to rehabilitate Camilla’s image so that they could marry. I think that he put that above being a father and the way Harry writes about their relationship makes that clear too.

I also think that it’s suited the palace to portray Harry as dimwitted and feckless to show William in a better light and that Harry has every right to be angry about that and not want to play that game anymore (and to call it out now). Especially as it’s obvious that the palace haven’t kept up their side of the bargain and protected Harry from the media in return.

I also think that the media have treated H and M poorly and it’s clearly the case that the palace has used them and news stories about them to divert from other newsworthy problems… certainly Prince Andrew, perhaps William’s affair/s. Is Harry overly jumpy about the media and the paparazzi in particular? Yes, of course. Who wouldn’t be with his background. But they’ve also obviously been hounded and harassed.

I do think that Harry is on a journey that he isn’t at the end of yet, but I think that he realises that too. I think that he was always going to leave the royal family and that Meghan didn’t cause what’s happened, she was just the catalyst for it. I think that he’s been scapegoated and an afterthought within his nuclear family and I don’t blame him for being angry. I think that he means well and is essentially good. And I don’t think that anyone who’s read the whole book would be able to disagree.

More than anything I think it’s clear that the British Royal Family is no longer fit for purpose; the way they live, bring up their children, pay their members for work and demand unrealistic levels of protocol and formality is no longer working in the 21st century. These people need purpose and lives beyond the crown and those on the edges of the heir shouldn’t have to live their lives in service of the their. Realistically H and M could have worked as royals and had private interests, the RF chose not to bend to help them live fulfilling lives because of its own, outdated reasons.

If anyone wants a free ebook let me know

No he didn’t. But his children have. I think being married to someone you weren’t particularly interested in didn’t help.

These people need purpose and lives beyond the crown and those on the edges of the heir shouldn’t have to live their lives in service of the their. Realistically H and M could have worked as royals and had private interests, the RF chose not to bend to help them live fulfilling lives because of its own, outdated reasons.

The Duchess of Kent worked as a primary school teacher in Hull with the Queen's blessing. Just saying.

I read it too and although I'm really cringing at all the interviews and airing of family business, I agree with you about the book. The ghostwriter has gone a great job and you can almost 'hear' his voice coming through.

I was most surprised by what was written contrasted with how the media reported it. For example, I saw an outraged headline somewhere that claimed in the book Harry referred to Caroline Flack as his 'bit of rough'. Yet in the context of the book, he didn't say that at all. He said he was horrified to see that's what the papers called her.

There were loads of other differences too and even the bit where he talks about Afghanistan. It definitely was not a boast about how many people he killed. If anything it was looking at how he'd become quite alarmingly disassociated.

I could have done with less talk of his 'todger' though! 😂

Overall, I'd say it is worth reading. I'm still not a fan but out of this whole thing, he's come out looking the best in the book.

I’ve always felt sympathetic to H&M and I do even more so now.

my heart aches for that little boy whose dad didn’t hug him after his mother died.

The royals have completely thrown them both under the bus and I don’t blame him at all for wanting to tell his side of the story.

I hope he can heal now and be happy with his lovely wife and beautiful children.

Even now, people hate Harry more than a Prince Andrew - an actual child abuser. Shows how much the royal pr machine actually works! Toxic

The headline was about Caroline Flack's manager, who posted saying that Harry was gross for reminding everyone about the things the press had said about her. "Harry's decision to remind all of the terrible things said about her to help sell his appalling book is grotesque."

To be fair to be him, he lost his Mum at what, 12? Had a rather absent father in Charles and was then forced to grieve in the public eye. Privilege and wealth aside, I’d say that’s a pretty hard and traumatic thing for any child to deal with.

When you say things like "From almost the moment Diana died it seems that he wanted, above everything else, to rehabilitate Camilla’s image so that they could marry" and "I also think that it’s suited the palace to portray Harry as dimwitted and feckless to show William in a better light" I take it that you have got that from the book? In which case I think you need to think about whether you want to rely on one side of the story only. Things like the Nazi uniform episode and the description of how he lost his virginity do rather tend to suggest no-one else needs to portray him as dim and feckless, he does a good job of that by himself.

I don't see how you can say "it’s obvious that the palace haven’t kept up their side of the bargain and protected Harry from the media" when the reality is that he's been protected all his life until he decided he could do better on his own - which unfortunately is another example of him being dim.

What makes you think the Commonwealth want them??????

Harry gets more "hate" than Andrew because he is putting it out there Andrew has "mostly" kept his head down

Just finished reading it, and I'm with @Eyerollcentral

He comes across as completely lacking in empathy or kindness for anyone except himself and Meghan. He appears to think they are both some kind of magical higher beings who feels things differently from other people.

I am pretty shocked at how extensive his drug use is. There is a lot of moaning about not having much in the way of money - but doesn't seem to be any issue with being able to buy plane tickets to Botswana or Canada at the drop of a hat. Or indeed the weed he was smoking every night in Nott Cott.

Also intrigued that he doesn't want to touch his inheritance so he can leave that to Archie and Lily? So it's fine to sit on £20million+ which you want to give your kids, but in the meantime expect the taxpayers of the UK to cough up for his security overseas.

He's very happy to make nasty remarks about others, he's very happy to reveal other people's conversations, text messages etc - but complains about intrusion on his privacy? At one point he talks about meeting a Holocaust survivor in Germany and how shocking her stories are... which he won't share because those are hers to tell not his.... having revealed all kinds of things about other people who almost certainly haven't given permission.

I find the inaccuracies worrying - some are easily proven false, others are really stretching credulity (what first-time mother of Meghan's age having had an epidural is out of hospital within an hour of delivering the baby?) and just made me wonder how much artistic licence was taken with other recollections.

I'd always thought Harry was the fun but dim one who was occasionally a bit of a wild child but would eventually settle down. I felt really sorry for him over his mother, over being outed when he was serving in the army and having to leave and for a lot of the Press abuse. It must be pretty hard not having total freedom to make choices as a result of your birth.

After reading the book I think he's a petulant spoilt man-child who has taken too many drugs, probably found some not very good therapists and is trying to do things he isn't actually mentally equipped to do (either intellectually or psychologically). He has done enormous damage to himself, the RF and the UK.

It was a pretty easy read, but not sure I'd want to wade through a sequel.

im indifferent to M+H. I take no interest in the RF gossip. I won’t read the book. However, I’ve seen Harry’s recent interviews and he comes across as someone who’s poshly dim-witted (the poshness hides it slightly) and incredibly out of touch with most people.

I don't care really what the comtent of the book is. The fact it's been written, gives personal details of his family without their consent, and puts down members of his family for the world to see, is enough for me to form an opinion.

is that a universal opinion on biographies? Or just a standard you hold Harry to?

I saw an outraged headline somewhere that claimed in the book Harry referred to Caroline Flack as his 'bit of rough'. Yet in the context of the book, he didn't say that at all. He said he was horrified to see that's what the papers called her.

**

Charles wasn't an absent father he was there he ran the parents race the same day Diana did 🙄 he praised his dad until recently then it was suddenly he was never around never took me for a bike ride I went to boarding school

My dad cracked my spine as a young child and refused to let me go to the Dr's THAT is child abuse and neglect fucking boarding school is not neglectful

They did. Empire 2. Somewhere and somehow between recording the Netflix series and publication of the book the narrative changed.

I’ve also read Valentine Low’s Courtiers which is pretty useful for giving the other side of the story. Far from throwing Harry into the jaws of the press, the palace comms machine seems to have done a pretty good job of covering his tracks for the best part of 20 years. Which is why we’re hearing about the drug use for the first time.

The latest interview with Briony Gordon is shocking. “Nice children you’ve got, Willy. Be a shame if anything happened to them”. Blackmail is ugly and that’s how low he’s stooping now.

The part of the book referring to how Charles stroked Harry's cheek every night until he fell asleep and how he arrived in his bedroom every night to do this, even when Harry didn't expect it, is really very touching.

Not sure if Harry intended it, but Charles comes out of the book rather well. It was very mean to talk about the teddy bear though. Harry would have a fit if it was the other way around.

The real vitriol seems to be saved for William - and the Press.

"He comes across as completely lacking in empathy or kindness for anyone except himself and Meghan. He appears to think they are both some kind of magical higher beings who feels things differently from other people'

This.
Their smugness shines through like a self satisfied Cheshire Cat.

Yes, it’s wrong to say he was absent or neglectful. He has tried not to repeat the upbringing he had. He has talked openly to his children about the difficulties he had with bullying and trying to find his place in the world. Harry repaid him by including mocking details about his teddy bear.

@Eyerollcentral Nicely put.

How I'd love to be a fly on the wall in the RF's residences as they read this self-serving, one-sided account of his life and theirs.

I can imagine they're utterly fuming at how terribly he's painted them all, knowing they'd have no way of giving their side of the story.
I can imagine there's much more to the stories he tells about Megan and Kate, but he can't possible say a bad word about Megan so Kate is thrown under the bus.

I'm another who was shocked at the casual drug use. He seems to have access to drugs wherever he goes, even when he is in hiding. He's then astounded when paparazzi find him. Maybe his dealer grasses him up!

I did come away feeling a lot of pity for Charles. He seems to try hard in parts to foster a good relationship, but there's clearly a huge disconnect with his son. I can imagine Harry has caused him immense heartache, most especially in the last few years.

I'm just wondering if the OP would have written this post if you had to post under your real name. Would anyone openly admit to reading the book?

I never said he was abuseful or neglectful, I’m sure Charles loves his children very much!

However, between his royal duties and boarding school, he’s not exactly a parent who’s there every day. Again, I’m not saying this is neglectful (plenty of parents choose to send their children to boarding school and there’s nothing wrong with this!) I’m simply saying I can see how this would have been hard on a 12 year old boy who’s just lost his Mum.

I would openly admit to reading it - I will also say that I read a free e-copy a friend sent me. I wasn't up for donating to the coffers.

God I have told everyone so know I’ve read it in real life. I’m a wide reader, not sure why any one wouldn’t admit it