Meghan & Harry Were Lying From The Start, Weren't They?

[TheShellBeach]

As per the thread title.

Right from the word go, Meghan and Harry were not telling the truth. About anything.

Now the Netflix series has come out it just proves it, over and over again.

Attention isn't what either of them should have been wanting. I don't know if they were. Whatever anyone says or thinks about the RF, or about how well they do it, their job is to serve the people.

I'd be surprised if this hasn't occurred to them, and who knows - it might even have influenced Harry's choice to publicise his in-and-out visit to his dad

I felt sorry for her but I get that he was sharp with her because he knew it was essential she stopped talking.

This is not cool. On several levels. There are Americans here (Hi!). We can post as we wish, as often as we like, wherever we like, for or against whatever.

@AliceOlive in no way whatsoever do I have an opinion about what Americans should post on MN. It’s not for me (or anyone) to police people at all and I am really sorry that’s how you took what I said. I was trying to hint at something else but obviously expressed it ineptly.

Thanks @Byfleet!

I'm less sympathetic than some on here regarding Meghan's inability to follow protocol - or, in some cases, plain common sense and good manners. She was not a 19 year-old, like Diana! She was a mature woman and an experienced actress, presumably used to taking direction, learning scripts and to putting on an appropriate persona. I'm sure there was lots of advice available to her, but she didn't take it, clearly.

Even I would realise that:

When going on the Buck House balcony, follow, watching for your place in the line, smile, look forward (or up at the nice aeroplanes) and wave if appropriate. Do not talk, except to say something you don't mind the world knowing because of lip readers. Do not require telling twice!!!

At state occasions, calm down, don't chatter, and it's not about you so just follow directions and let go of Harry's hand (it looked awful at the Queen's funeral).

I'm not getting into the deeper issues here - just that her complaint that she wasn't told anything about royal protocol and how to conduct herself is a bit rich coming from a 'professional'.

I also thought MM looked closer to hurt tears than temper on the balcony as though he'd cut her to the quick in front of his family. I felt sorry for her. As to H's recent visit to London, I don't believe we've heard where he stayed that night and whether he met up with any friends or family? A lot of assuming going on about H being all alone in an airport motel before his flight home.

It wouldn't have been airport hotel would it? It was supposedly a luxury hotel, but you're right, no one really knows. He certainly wasn't here long enough to see anyone other than on the one night he stayed.

Exactly. She lacked basic manners or any awareness of how she came across. Anyone with half a brain would have known not to turn her back to the crowds and start talking to Harry at a public event on a balcony. I think she was actually quite insecure despite all the talking over people and making everything about herself.

Rosetta

Quite - and from watching her in all kinds of contexts, my impression is that she just doesn't know how to conduct herself, what to do with herself really, when she's not the centre of attention. It really jumps out to me that she cannot cope with the spotlight being on others.

And that was the root of the problem, I think, and it does speak of immaturity.

Anyone with half a brain would have known not to turn her back to the crowds and start talking to Harry at a public event on a balcony

I believe the actual issue was that the band was playing God Save the Queen at the time, so Harry was reminding her that the protocol was to stand still and pay attention.

And that was the root of the problem, I think, and it does speak of immaturity

Not to mention a good dollop of self centeredness.

Even worse!

I am dealing with someone like this currently. Actually thinking about it that way gives me a bit more sympathy. In this case it goes back to childhood and upbringing. I do lose patience with settled adults who haven’t looked around to see how others are behaving and take in cues, though.

She's a textbook narcissist so a lot of the RF experience triggered her narcissistic rage. Narcs lack a "secure sense of self" so they can be very insecure deep down. They're constantly seek high status and external validation to make themselves feel good about themselves. Meghan obviously hit the jackpot by marrying a prince which gave her the title but within the RF, everyone has a title! So during royal events, she had nothing to make herself feel more superior to everyone else, and was most likely deeply triggered by the feeling of having done something wrong or being "less than" the others. She channeled all this into a victim mindset (another narc tactic) and played the race card for the public. To be honest, I believe racism/unconscious bias may have played some role in how she was treated but it was definitely not a heinous as she and Harry portrayed it. Any POC will report experiencing some level of micro-aggression when in a predominantly white work or family environment. It's simply not possible, at this point in history, to go through life expecting to be treated like a 100% white person if you are not.

However if she managed to develop a thicker skin and just tough it out for a few years then she and Harry could have had a reasonably good life in the UK. They would essentially have the same lifestyle as W&K without all the pressures, especially in light of Charles taken ill. But Meghan was clearly after the flashy, new money, celebrity lifestyle that only the USA can offer. She wanted to be someplace not surrounded by anyone else with a title, but having one herself which would heighten her own sense of superiority all the time. That's a dream scenario for a narc and explains why she never gave up the title and uses it on book covers, correspondence and everywhere else possible.

But despite initial fanfare, it's clear M&H have virtually nothing to offer aside from the exoticness of their titles. They might be treated as VIPs in the US for a while because aristocracy is rare and special, but it's slowly becoming clear that they do not add value or can generate income for anyone. This dramatically lowers their status in the meritocratic and capitalist American culture. Meghan was not invited to be on the Vogue cover of 40 most influential women, they have not been spotted in the Golden Globes or Grammys or any significant events. In American networking, a lot has to do with how much monetary or PR value you can generate for others. Ironically, M&H would have had more clout by staying in Britain (or maybe Europe) where the idea of "inherent value" due to your family title is more acceptable.

There are some children raised with the idea that everyone is to be treated the same no matter the occasion. They are never taught to modulate their voice or behavior. Because they were taught they are perfect and wonderful and there’s no such thing as decorum.

So you end up with a person who doesn’t believe they need to defer to their manager, for instance. Or a person who swears gratuitously wherever they may be no matter the company. Who sucks the air out of the room and talks over others and never realizes they are making people uncomfortable. (This is happening in my life now, not talking about MM).

Or maybe you get someone who publicly issues a statement clapping back at the Queen, their husband’s grandmother. Someone who greets company barefoot and tries to hug strangers. Who doesn’t think people might be uncomfortable sharing lipgloss.

I hate the word narcissist lately. The behaviors usually stem from family trauma and neglect.

My person tried to share a drink with me the other day. I generally don’t drink after others and handle do it with my own husband! I was just taught not to do that, by my father, repeatedly as a child, so every time I do it’s uncomfortable and I probably make a face.

Very wise @AliceOlive , I would never share a drink since I discovered that everyone leaves a small amount of their saliva behind and I accumulates at the bottom of the drink! 🤮

User and Alice - I agree with your posts.

I don't like throwing around 'psycho-therapy' terms, either, Alice, but I think it's undeniable that Meghan has narcissistic traits. Who knows how that originated? Possibly missing her mum growing up at various points? We'll never know.

But she absolutely ticks the classic boxes.

Someone mentioned on MN the other day that Prince Philip referred to her as 'The Duchess of Windsor' and another poster thought that was terrible. Well, OK, it wasn't by nice, but I can see what he meant! A clever, older, American divorcee hooking up with a very dim member of the RF, who appears to dote on her and to be blind to any problems. Also, Meghan's insecurity about Catherine is echoed in Mrs Simpson's bitchy comment that the Queen Mother looked like a 'Fat Cook', and in fact Mrs S's name for the QM was 'Cookie'. There certainly are parallels. As we know, the Windsors spent a pretty miserable time together as time went on, trapped in the myth of their romantic devotion.

But at least the Windsors never went on an international platform to badmouth their royal relations. And in those days - it just wasn't done - it would have been social suicide.

Oh and - on the subject of titles, I think you're spot-on, User. And mild monarchist as I am, I've always though it the height of bad manners and bad taste to go to the USA, a proud republic for 250 years, and flash your 'royal' titles around. It's just not appropriate there!! I'm guessing that the demographic in America which likes the British RF is not the same as those who like H & M, so it's a big misjudgment on their part.

It reminds me of one of the Jeeves and Wooster stories/episodes, where they are in New York and one of Bertie's feckless friends needs money, and they end up selling handshakes from the father of another feckless friend, who is a Duke.

There is a delegation in town from Pittsburgh(?) who each pay $10 to shake the hand of a genuine duke - the duke, of course, not realising he was a money making enterprise 😁

So the whole 'Americans pride themselves on not having titles while adoring people with titles' thing has a long history!

I totally agree with this and time and time again you see this at the various events. Her face changes so much to "on camera" and "off".

I agree with a lot of what you are saying @CoffeeCantata however I am not convinced that Meghan is as clever as some people ( including her!) think . So much of what she says is just meaningless word salad.

Ive also noticed some photos where her face is absolutely thunderous when she thinks the camera isn't on her. She looks angry and unpleasant. I think there is also an on camera and off camera personality.