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The royal family

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Original poster

Does anyone want a thread for people who are happy for Harry and Meghan?

999 replies

DaveCoaches · 17/01/2020 13:40

Just seeing if there’s any interest. I think they have their faults but I think this may turn out to be a good thing long term. Anyone want to join in?

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8
SenecaFallsRedux · 17/02/2020 14:06

drina27 I wouldn't go so far as to say "unhealthy" but I do think that there is a lot of expectation in non-royal families to treat all children and grandchildren equally to the extent possible because it is perceived to be a healthy approach.

There must be certain challenges in growing up in a system that by its very nature puts far greater importance on certain children than others. I remember someone saying on MN that Diana always expected Harry to support William as the heir. I'm certainly glad that I didn't grow up in a family where the expectation was that I existed in some way as a "spare" and my role was to support a sibling or cousin or whomever. I understand that is the nature of a hereditary monarchy, but I also understand why some people in that system may think from time to time that it is not the healthiest environment for them and their families.

MangoFeverDream · 17/02/2020 14:46

I don't think it had to have been anything formal. Something as simple as Kate or William holding Archie at the polo would've gone a long way

They really acted like strangers there; only Louis seemed interested in Archie and H&M

yolofish · 17/02/2020 18:13

Hmm. I don't really care that M didnt wear tights (nor would I!) or she opened her own car door (so would I!)

I think where she and Harry went wrong was that they wanted to change everything at once, and no one likes a new broom at work.

Better to come in softly, and change things gently. I haven't seen the latest photos, but apparently they both look really happy - which is fantastic.

peridito · 17/02/2020 18:30

Except there is nothing to suggest that H&M wanted to change everything at once .Sigh .

meercat23 · 17/02/2020 18:47

Well they did change quite a lot in a short time. Splitting the press offices, leaving the joint foundation with William and Kate, and the fact that this was not enough for them to be able to be happy does suggest that taking more time for change didn't seem to be working for them

SenecaFallsRedux · 17/02/2020 18:51

It seems to me that they were playing by the rules for the most part, but every little deviation seemed to generate a torrent of negativity. The reaction to her not wanting to do the stand-on-the-steps of the hospital perfectly coiffed and in high heels a few hours after giving birth is a good example.

Samcro · 17/02/2020 19:12

Thanks seneca you said what i was trying to say, but better.
I do think the RF should have publicly supported H&M more.
I know people say MM isn't the only royal incomer to get slated, but i do think she has had it very hard, her family have not helped.

LaurieMarlow · 17/02/2020 19:20

Splitting the press offices, leaving the joint foundation with William and Kate

Tbh I don’t see how any of that impacted on your average royal fan.

They were entitled to try to make things work for them. It’s just that there was a certain cohort determined to be annoyed at everything they did.

The reaction to her not wanting to do the stand-on-the-steps of the hospital perfectly coiffed and in high heels a few hours after giving birth is a good example.

That was just extraordinary. It was then that I realised that the expectations were just batshit and that people clearly thought they owned the woman.

LaurieMarlow · 17/02/2020 19:22

I know people say MM isn't the only royal incomer to get slated

No she wasn’t. None of it is okay though. They are people at the end of the day. Not playthings of the public.

And I agree she had it harder even than Fergie (and she had it tough).

Cerseirys · 17/02/2020 19:24

When you consider that they were able to indirectly support Prince Andrew (going with him to church etc) it seems a pretty poor show that they couldn't do the same for Meghan.

meercat23 · 17/02/2020 19:42

I think they did try in the earlier days. There was a trip with the Queen and Prince Charles is supposed to have invited her to an exhibition. The church trips were at Sandringham and/or Balmoral though and H&M hadn't been to either for a while.

Encyclo · 17/02/2020 19:43

When you consider that they were able to indirectly support Prince Andrew (going with him to church etc) it seems a pretty poor show that they couldn't do the same for Meghan.

I was very disappointed to see absolutely zero support for them when they clearly would've benefited from it. They were left twisting in the wind.

WinnieTheW0rm · 18/02/2020 08:03

Rit's not so long ago that Meghan was the first fiancée to Sandringham for Christmas (everyone else was only after marriage) plus she had public engagements with the Queen much earlier in Royal career than anyone else - a sign taken to mean approval and reported as such by the press. Their absence from Sandringham was reported as their choice (and following example of others such as Cambridges) - are you saying that's actually a lie, they were barred from attending and all the previous support somehow doesn't count?

LaurieMarlow · 18/02/2020 08:10

are you saying that's actually a lie, they were barred from attending and all the previous support somehow doesn't count?

I don’t think anyone’s saying anything remotely like that.

FuckeryOmbudsman · 18/02/2020 08:23

"I don't think it had to have been anything formal. Something as simple as Kate or William holding Archie at the polo would've gone a long way"

K&W were probably a little busy with their three.

There are plenty of happy shots of cousins playing near together and their parents interacting. Why would pix be selected to bash K&W for not dong enough?

As there is no/low contact since 2016 with the family in the States (when she last posted about how great herbDad was), it would be a great shame if there was similar no/low contact with their paternal family. The Duke says the couple share the same values, and I just don't believe his family mean nothing to him

WinnieTheW0rm · 18/02/2020 08:27

"I don’t think anyone’s saying anything remotely like that"

Thank you - that clarifies that the level of support the PA enjoyed was available to them (and possibly in greater form, as they wouid surelymhave been with the family on Christmas Day as well as on Sundays). They chose not to be there - it was not support that was withheld

LaurieMarlow · 18/02/2020 08:29

Thank you - that clarifies that the level of support the PA enjoyed was available to them (and possibly in greater form, as they wouid surelymhave been with the family on Christmas Day as well as on Sundays). They chose not to be there - it was not support that was withheld

No not at all.

Gosh you’re not into the nuance are you? Hmm

The point that’s being made is the very visible, public support given by the Queen in actually being seen with Andrew directly after the controversy.

Nothing similar was in evidence for H&M.

LaurieMarlow · 18/02/2020 08:30

Nothing whatsoever to do with invites to Sandringham.

peridito · 18/02/2020 08:43

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meercat23 · 18/02/2020 08:56

I take the points about how a little visible support could have helped but, as H&M were in Canada from Thanksgiving until January the kind of visible support given to Prince Andrew would not have been very easy. AQs others have said, earlier the Queen did offer visible support in different ways.

Just as on other threads some people are at pains to point out all of the ways in which H&M have been at fault, here there seems to be a tendency to take the reverse approach. In reality it probably isn't so clear cut.

LaurieMarlow · 18/02/2020 09:00

i take the points about how a little visible support could have helped but, as H&M were in Canada from Thanksgiving until January the kind of visible support given to Prince Andrew would not have been very easy

They’ve been getting guff from the press since shortly after they got married.

meercat23 · 18/02/2020 09:02

Yes but that is a different point to that raised above about how a little visible support like that given to Andrew could have helped.

peridito · 18/02/2020 09:04

Yes I'm sure the reality is more complex than we know and that it's easy to view the little there is in the public domain through a filter of our choice .

Which allows me to post this again Smile

Does anyone want a thread for people who are happy for Harry and Meghan?
LaurieMarlow · 18/02/2020 09:10

Yes but that is a different point to that raised above about how a little visible support like that given to Andrew could have helped.

There are lots of ways in which more open support could have helped.

I’ve outlined what I think those are upthread.

It’s not about what happens privately (I’ve no reason to doubt the queen at least was hospitable) but about sending a message to the press who’s side the firm are actually on. Which the Queen did subtly by being pictured with Andrew.

There are many times they could have done that with H&M. Pretty much since their marriage. Not necessarily being photographed but clarifying points of ‘protocol’, warning bc against printing lies, etc.

They didn’t though. It suited them not to I think.

The queens last statement about them was quite warm. But it was too late then , damage done.

Encyclo · 18/02/2020 10:36

are you saying that's actually a lie, they were barred from attending and all the previous support somehow doesn't count?

Where did I say that?

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