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Original poster

Dd threw the kitten.... where to go from here?

246 replies

bobndave · 19/12/2019 19:27

Hi! Opinions please as I'm feeling really upset and guilty about this. I'm a single mum with a dd(6) and we've quite recently got a kitten after having a pair of old cats for most of her life so far. I'd have said that she was gentle and loves animals. She's a well behaved child, no issues.
Tonight though, the kitten did something that annoyed her..... stood on her picture leaving a little paw print on it. When she discovered it a few minutes later, even though the kitten was nowhere near the picture by this time, she scooped the kitten up and threw it across the room. The kitten is fine but has made a puddle near the door, presumably in fright?

Now, I know this is the season for bad behaviour as they're tired and over excited but this has really crossed a line for me. I've taken away her iPad and given a big lecture but where do I go from here? Constant supervision until she's 18? More punishment? Or just accept that she's young and needs more teaching about how to be with animals?
Would appreciate all views and have my hard hat firmly on.... thanks!!

OP posts:
madcatladyforever · 19/12/2019 19:44

The kitten needs to be rehomed urgently. If a child of mine did this they would not get one single Xmas present. I take animal abuse very seriously. The next time the kitten could have broken bones or internal injuries and you risk internal injuries. This is completely unacceptable.

madcatladyforever · 19/12/2019 19:45

6 is plenty old enough to understand this was very wrong.

OceanSunFish · 19/12/2019 19:45

Although this is shocking to read, when you think about it, it's similar behaviour to a 6yo who lashes out in anger at their younger sibling who accidentally ruins their picture - and let's face it, many 6yos have done that kind of thing at some point.

So I don't think it means the cat needs to be re homed (as long as it was a one-off). You've had the punishment and serious conversation. Make it clear you will re home the cat if this happens again. Then leave it there.

XXcstatic · 19/12/2019 19:45

PS I totally agree with everyone saying the kitten must be protected though.

Sparrowlegs248 · 19/12/2019 19:46

I'd be most concerned that this wasn't a reaction, but a deliberate act of seeking the kitten out and throwing it.

I woujdnt extend the punishment but have a very honest talk with her about hiwcthe kitten could have been badly hurt, how much bigger and stronger she is, how scared the kitten was, and how it's a REALLY unkind thing to do. Does she want to be seen as a bully, who is cruel to tiny kittens? Emphasise that lots of people have said they would rehome the kitten. Does she want that to happen? If anything even remotely like that happens again, rehome it.

SmileCheese · 19/12/2019 19:46

But she won't have understood it in the way an adult would - that the kitten could have been killed.

You are seriously underestimating 6 year olds if you don't think they are capable of understanding that throwing a small defenceless animal may mean it comes to severe harm.

I'm amazed you are surprised that so many have suggested rehoming the kitten OP, surely you can see its the only sensible option??

GrapefruitGin · 19/12/2019 19:47

Oh my goodness, poor little mite. Please get kitten checked over in case of any internal damage. I would be very concerned about your dd’s behaviour, has she ever displayed any form of violence before? Does she have siblings?

Drum2018 · 19/12/2019 19:47

The next time the kitten could have broken bones or internal injuries

It could possibly have them now. Op, have you brought the kitten to a vet to be checked over.

LizzieSiddal · 19/12/2019 19:48

OP I don’t think you should have posted this question in the LitterTray.

You should post in another topic about children’s behaviour. Even if you do rehome the kitten, how will that help your dd? You must get to the bottom of why she even had that idea in her head. It hasn’t come from nowhere.

And ignore anyone saying you’re a bad parent!

SmileCheese · 19/12/2019 19:49

It could possibly have them now. Op, have you brought the kitten to a vet to be checked over.

It hadn't actually occurred to me that the Op hadn't taken the kitten to the vets first, surely she didn't start this thread before considering the wellbeing of the kitten and if she did I would also be concerned about her abilities as a pet owner! Shock

Thoughtlessinengland · 19/12/2019 19:49

Have you made sure that poor little kitten doesn’t have internal injuries? I feel sick reading this. Re home immediately. I have a 4 year old so it’s not as though I “do not understand”. The thought of that tiny thing feeling such absolute terror and urinating in fright. Jesus Christ. I feel sick.

Fluffycloudland77 · 19/12/2019 19:50

You need to re-home, kittens are vulnerable. The kitten must be terrified now that’s happening.

Where did you get it from?.

Bunnybigears · 19/12/2019 19:50

I'm sorry a 6 year old that specifically went to find the cat to throw it would not have a cat anymore. I would rehome the kitten and not consider another pet for a number of years.

Original poster
bobndave · 19/12/2019 19:50

Is she generally angry about something?

No generally not angry at all, quite pleasant, smiley and easy going. I'll be watching out now.

It's an absolute disgrace there isn't serious consequences for your daughter. Six is old enough to know how to interact with animals and frankly it tells me a lot about you a parent.

Out of interest @toodlethenoodle what would you consider the right consequence in this moment? Obviously if I do decide to rehome it can't be tonight. I have removed the iPad, talked seriously and sent her to bed whilst I think about it. I'm not ruling out other consequences just not rushing into a knee jerk reaction without thinking things through. I think that's reasonable and if you tell me what you would think are the right consequences then I will add that to my thinking.

OP posts:
Thoughtlessinengland · 19/12/2019 19:52

Tackling your child’s behaviour is a whole different matter but frankly at this very moment it is irrelevant. What is relevant is what the vet has said after checking out the kitten thoroughly for internal bleeding, internal injuries and broken bones. What? You haven’t don’t that already as a matter of absolute priority? A kitten was flung from afar and peed itself in fright and you haven’t gone straight to the vets? Please get rid of this kitten and do not have further pets.

GrapefruitGin · 19/12/2019 19:52

I agree that 6 is old enough to know that was a horrific act of violence. Perhaps you should seek professional advice.

Thoughtlessinengland · 19/12/2019 19:52

what would you consider the right consequence in this moment?

IRRELEVANT.

Take kitten to vets.

FatBlobbyBob · 19/12/2019 19:52

Our cat stands on DCs artwork & puzzles all the time.

My DC just say cats name "Ohhh Tinks, thats my picture!"
Followed by a Crown Hmm then lots of laughter and DC giving the cat a good head rub as they know the cat is just being nosey looking at whats going on.

My DC have never ever got cross with the cat.

Is your DD jealous of the kitten?

I would also be rehoming.

Original poster
bobndave · 19/12/2019 19:52

I have a friend a few doors down who is a vet, she gave the kitten a check over and he is fine, thanks for asking everybody.

OP posts:
MrsBertBibby · 19/12/2019 19:53

Get the kitten to the vet.
Keep your daughter away from the kitten, until you can rehome the poor thing.

Babyg1995 · 19/12/2019 19:53

Another saying rehome sorry but that's not normal behaviour at 6 or really any age .

maddiemookins16mum · 19/12/2019 19:53

If you do rehome, don’t a week before Christmas. Did it come from a Rescue as they may take her back.

CouscousEvaporator · 19/12/2019 19:53

Echoing the other posts - you need to take the kitten to the vets to check for internal injuries.

I am absolutely gobsmacked a 6 year old would do this. Poor kitten 🙁

OrangeHue · 19/12/2019 19:53

Oceansunfish. There’s a different between siblings fighting and a 6 year old throwing a helpless tiny kitten across the room.

I too take animal abuse very very seriously. Op, I can tell from your post you are upset but honestly the comment you made ‘ constant supervision until she’s 18?’ Is very flippant.

Not sure if either of you are ready or going to treat this poor kitten rightly.

XXcstatic · 19/12/2019 19:54

You are seriously underestimating 6 year olds if you don't think they are capable of understanding that throwing a small defenceless animal may mean it comes to severe harm

I didn't say that they were incapable of understanding that - quite the opposite, as I was encouraging the OP to make exactly this point to her DD. However, a 6 year old is highly impulsive and has an immature understanding of consequences. That's why we don't hold young children responsible for actions that would be criminal in someone older. It's also why young children should never be left unattended with animals.

I am sure that everyone on here who has more than 1 child has seen them do things to each other than could have been highly dangerous, but that were not meant to injure or cause harm.

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