Breeder turned us down

[Sellingseashells]

Spoken to a breeder last night about pups due later this year. Was recommended by a friend.i though it was going well but breeder said no. Said he don’t sell to people with children. DC are 10 and 4. Dog savvy.

i know the breeder doesn’t have to sell to us, but I’m really upset. Is it worth trying again? What do I do?

I don't think the breeder is saying his dogs are snappy, nervous etc.
He is saying he doesn't trust young children around his puppies and doesn't want to risk them being hurt or tormented and end up in rescue.

Staffordshire Bull Terrier. 🤗

I think people call them Staffords. I’ve only ever heard SBT.

Thank you! I’ve only ever heard it shortened to Staffy! I didn’t know they were good with kids — thought they’d be more of a risk than a Labrador, given size and strength of jaw. But a lot may have changed since I was last thinking of getting a dog.

@Ohgodohgod DD is 9 and sensible, I’d had a lab before, best dog ever. However in his puppyhood he grew fast and would jump, pounce and bite.
I’ve opted for a little girl staffy and she’s not too bad with biting, mum and dad are small and were very friendly. Breeder also had a rescue staff who was affectionate. Staffs are the only breed the kennel club say are good with children and a few friends have them- no issue. So fingers crossed-
we will be careful as you never know with any dog.

As a child myself we had a JRT, he was a menace. We kept him and loved him, but he was an adult biter. You had to wear thick leather slippers, couldn’t kiss him, or hug him, you had to be careful entering rooms etc it was hard work. I was age 12 and remember it well.

But can you take your dog out? Staffs tend not to like other dogs, or they play too rough and the other dogs don't like it. I never see staffs on our local rec, which is full of dogs. I just see them walked round the streets.

GSDs are land sharks at all stages. I do know cocker spaniels.
The problem is not the dog (not all breeds, I do think some are 100% unsuitable for children!) But the owner. If time for exercise and training are put in, the dog will be fine. The question is whether an owner can invest in those, not about the CS as a breed with children.

Actual SBT’s as in, well bred ones are pretty little dogs.

The breed standard is 14-16 inches, border terriers are 10-16 inches… so a male staffy is around about the same size as a male border terrier.

They do have large strong jaws for their size… but that size is not large. A lot of dogs people think are staffies are crosses of larger breeds.

Going back to the topic of the thread.

Lots of decent breeders won’t consider people with young children, no matter what breed - because it’s easier to have a blanket age than to judge a child’s behaviour and someone’s parenting.

Yes my sisters STB is 17kg 16inch roughly. Where my working Labrador is 30kg. Expecting 35-40kg adult weight and he’s around 25inch.

Our lab defiantly has more weight to knock our children over then my sisters STB. But I’d say the STB is much calmer than our boy despite being 6 months younger.

Thanks to those of you who have offered helpful comments. And thanks to the posters who said to ask what age he would sell to.

I texted last night and said I understood why he wouldn’t sell and I respected that but I wanted to ensure any puppy came from the best background as I think how a breeder behaves in the first 8 weeks is as crucial as health tests and could he tell me what age he would sell to as I was prepared to wait and I hoped he didn’t think that was me trying to pressure him as it wasn’t and I understood if he didn’t reply.

he rang later, and we had a good chat. I said that I knew the issues spaniels could have including guarding and that was why I was so keen for a good breeder as I think a good breeder is more likely to means robust puppies. Well bred puppies go wrong far less than badly bred ones and that’s down to breeding as much as it is raising a dog right. He explained his rationale again and I do understand as young children can lack impulse control.

Its 8. He said that when this litter are born if we wanted to come and meet the girl he plans to keep once the other puppies are gone and she’s vaccinated then he’s happy to do that on neutral ground and if all goes well, and we are happy to wait then he can put our name down. He only breeds once every three to four years and only one litter per girl.

i am more than happy to wait years for a well bred puppy from a breeder who cares. I am aware spaniels can have issues but so does every breed and I am more comfortable around spaniels and their issues as I have spent 40 years around them.

You are wrong , linage has a lot to do with temperament . In cats and in dogs . Aggression is a potential genetic predisposition.

Well what a good outcome OP

you sound very sensible

@Crazyworldmum that’s not what i said. of courze breeding plays a role, but in the wrong environment every dog can get agressive. And that part is out of a breeder’s control

Thank you for updating @Sellingseashells
This sounds like a very positive outcome. You already know that this is the breed for you, and it is definitely worth waiting to get the right dog.

@Sellingseashells I am glad all the negative comments haven't put you off cocker spaniels. Well bred ones are fantastic little dogs. I'm sure he/she will be well worth the wait.
It is possibly a wise decision to wait a little longer. We got our first two days before my youngest's 8th birthday. It was easily manageable then. Having my young GC around my current puppy is a lot harder. She's too excitable for them and they are too pokey for her.

Should be ok, my friend has them with other dogs, also cats and rabbits She’s only ten weeks, but is very submissive and happy to see other dogs. I’ll need to put in lots of work with socialisation. The breeder advised me to have a girl for this reason. To be honest it wouldn’t bother me if she can’t mix, we’ve a large garden and I’d pay for enclosed fields, or muzzle if need be.

The breeder was being responsible I think. We had a cocker spaniel who was a sweetheart till one morning with no warning he jumped up, bit my seven-year old dc's face tearing the cheek open, and snatched food from the table. I was told by the trainer I turned to, that I had to keep him away from all children or re-home him. We did re-home him very sadly. I have had two dogs since, family-friendly breeds, with no issues at all for years.

Why not get in touch with Dogs Trust or a similar rehoming organisation and adopt a dog that needs a home. They will match you with a dog that will suit your family, and you won’t be encouraging breeding.

Ah yes. Dogs Trust. Where they rehome dogs with severe resource guarding issues (serious enough they make a point of mentioning it!!!) with children. Brilliant charity - definitely no accidents waiting to happen there. (Dogs in question are Freya & Boris in their Shoreham branch - it won’t let me link)

Sorry, but with how lax these rescue centres are when it comes to serious issues (like resource guarding) it’s a wonder anyone with children would ever run the risk of adopting from them.

Or you have this shining example… https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/woman-mauled-rescue-dog-loses-29760364.amp - yes, you can definitely trust rescue centres.

Don't have Bull Dogs.
As 2 Bull Dogs no lead or attacked my Cat outside our Building.
My young daughter Had tried to intervene. But the owner had commanded his 2 Bull Dogs for attacking our Cat. But had lost Toe nails as 2 Bull dogs pulled cat back by his back paws but left a bald belly. As fur had been scraped along pavement
Vet's Bill had been high.

He sounds like a very responsible breeder @Sellingseashells , definitely worth waiting for one of his puppies.
I got my rescue when my DD was just 2 , she wasn't dog savvy, but small children generally aren't savvy in anything, far more important that the parents are dog and child savvy, I set clear boundaries for the child to protect them both.

My daughter & husband got a working Cocker. Children were 10 & 7, almost 11 & 8, very mature and responsible . DSIL had dogs all his life, mainly boxers, a very good, caring owner.My grandfather bred Scots Terriers , i spent a lot of time with different breeds and walked many. However no one was quite prepared for Jinky's unbridled energy, needed loads of walks off the leash. Fortunately I was available to do this with him. He was a wonderful dog, apart from chewing a good few things as a puppy really little trouble. Not a biter, loved people , could be a bit shy for 5 minutes only. They already had a cat but as Blossom thought she was a tiger was totally unfazed by him and often slept beside him in his huge bed. I had heard of Cocker rage but in all honesty never saw this once in Jinky. Great with the vet and the groomer. Maybe the working breed is different. He died just past his 15th birthday, i will miss him forever. This is indeed a sensible breeder with this policy for his dogs.

See my post of today. 100% agree with the energy levels. Our was the same, not a biter though even as a puppy. He loved people and children although we were always careful with both. The female vet and groomer said he had the best nature . Maybe we were just lucky.

Adopt, don't shop but the breeder is correct, your youngest is too young for your type of hone. Cockers do better with older childre, He's being responsible. Get an older dog, maybe 1 or 2 with a good temperament from rescue. Most of the dogs in rescue haven't done anything wrong, they just aren't wanted. A good rescue will match your family and lifestyle to a dog i used to do this for a rescue in west Wales and can say with some certainty, you will find a dog to match your circumstances/lifestyle through rescue centres.

Very unusual, but they clearly have the dogs best interests at heart- dogs can have a tough time in households with children, especially as young as 4. There are good reasons behind the fact it is pretty much impossible insure against damage caused by children under 5.

Cockers are gorgeous, but a full on breed. They sound like good breeders who are being responsible for the future welfare of their pups. You are wise to go through a good breeder, but please don't be tempted to now cast your net further afield eg Online advertisers who may be willing to sell to anyone, but whose pups are bred poorly eg Greeders! I totally understand you are upset though.