Breeder turned us down

[Sellingseashells]

Spoken to a breeder last night about pups due later this year. Was recommended by a friend.i though it was going well but breeder said no. Said he don’t sell to people with children. DC are 10 and 4. Dog savvy.

i know the breeder doesn’t have to sell to us, but I’m really upset. Is it worth trying again? What do I do?

We affectionately nicknamed our working cocker ‘the raptor’ when she was a puppy. Alternatively, the ‘hell hound’. The sharpest needle teeth imaginable as a pup and always exploring her world through her mouth/teeth.

It was like having a toddler again and the puppy months were exhausting compared to the puppy months of our other dogs. She bit/nipped a lot, not aggressively but playfully. Still hurt! I imagine the breeder would not want this scenario to end badly for his pups.

She’s older now, so affectionate and intelligent and we love her to absolute bits but she does require a minimum of an hour exercise (off lead) a day. When we went on holiday seaside, she quite happily ran for 4 to 5 hours a day!

I think it’s the right decision by the breeder. Puppies in general are very bitey and with some breeds it can go on a bit longer than with others. I wouldn’t ring again. A 4yr old is a very young child, we had a puppy around the same time my youngest was 4 and it was very hard work and I can see why many dogs who go to young families are returned. It’s difficult to put the time in training the pup while balancing the needs of a 4yr old

No, don't argue. He is the expert and it's up to him. If you think you know better then you are not suitable to have any dog.

OP, what sort of cocker are you after? Working or show? Most working cockers are full on and need an owner who is either reasonably experienced with dogs or who is prepared to take the dog to a gundog trainer on a regular basis and take a lot of advice until it's reasonably trained. There is a regular parade of of desperate OPs with out of control working line cockers and cocker crosses on this board, and nobody wants you to join it.

OTOH, I don't think that having a four year old should mean that you cant get a puppy. DH and I grew up with dogs and got our first puppy when our youngest DC was not yet a year old. The only significant issues we had were a shortage of time to train her (which wouldnt have been an issue if DH's work hours hadnt been so insane) and a few chewed toys.

I'd not go back to that breeder. Have a serious think about breed and whether you can fulfil the dog's needs, and then as a PP suggests, look for a litter raised around children - not essential, but helpful.

It’s difficult to put the time in training the pup while balancing the needs of a 4yr old

Nearly forgot about the training. Our puppy kept jumping up at people and I got a trainer in to work with us at first, and then went on multiple training courses. Working cockers are highly intelligent and need the right kind of stimulation. As the trainer said to us, you don’t want an unemployed working cocker as they’ll find their own employment!

No way would i have a cocker with a child that age. Every one I've ever known was a biting menace. Two were generally dangerous with how they could turn and bite with genuinely no warning.

What a sensible breeder. He is obviously experienced and wants the best life possible for his dogs. He is to be commended.,

We have a cocker x king charles. As an adult, she is well behaved around other dogs and people.

As a pup she was a nightmare. Our son was 8 at the time, and wouldn't be in the same part of the house as her. She was a shark and would resource guard. And terrible on the lead because she wanted to smell everything and would randomly jump into bushes.

Doesnt now. But she still needs two long walks a day. Sometimes she has a third walk with a dog walker.

Pure breed cockers can be absolute nuts. I can see why the breeder has concerns.

My cocker bit my then 10 year old on the face. I had no idea they were biters. She still is (she's now 14). Don't get a cocker is my advice.

I'm sorry, but I don't think that's a reasonable conclusion to draw at all - it's unnecessarily hard on the OP and is the sort of comment that puts people off posting for advice.

He might over-cautious by nature. He might have had one very exceptional bad experience. He might have been badly misled by a previous buyer. He might have felt that he didn't click with the OP and that put him off.

I wouldn't go and ask him again, though: his mind is made up. And he might indeed be being sensible and have a totally solid reason why OP shouldn't have one of his puppies (maybe his bitch was an absolute nightmare puppy) but wondering if he's correct doesn't make OP 'not suitable to have any dog'.

I don't think pleading your case is reasonable, however I think it'd be ok to ask if it's children or children under a certain age - then you can decide whether to wait a few years until your youngest is old enough and approach them again.

We had a cocker when I was a child who was as good as gold but the family were at home and got lots of attention.

Cockers can be very people oriented but also very needy and don't like being alone. That's only my experience though.

Cocker spaniels are a working breed, they need lots of stimulation and walks, they can be very hard to train. I agree with the breeder, small children and very active cocker spaniels are not a good fit.

We have a working cocker and a toddler the Cocker was here before the toddler and man it is full on (granted he had some issues as he was a rescue but much better now) but no way could we have handled a puppy and the toddler!!

Once he goes we will not be getting another one

I agree with the majority of posters. You haven't had a dog I understand, and are wanting a high energy breed. I have 2 border collies, I've had them since I was 13. We've had a few other breeds as well. When my last d cat died we decided to get a third dog, went for a toy breed,a Phalene. We live in east Sussex I had to drive to Taunton in Somerset to be vetted by the breeder, before she would consider us as potential owners. A friend of mine said that was ridiculous, I said it was a sign of a good breeder. She stupidly bought a pedicure dog at pedigree price from a Sussex pet shop which was always in the news,bad reports and had to be PTS young.

Great to read of a responsible breeder.

I volunteer in Spaniel rescue and we get many in for rehoming that have been essentially ruined by young children.

I have 2 cocker spaniels, they aren’t IMO first family dogs, I think the breeder is very responsible.
As pups they can be very hard work, they are well known to go through the cockerdile phase especially in high energy environments. I think cockers are an amazing breed, my 2 are 100% in all situations but it has taken a lot of time/effort/consistency in their early days . I know of 2 personally bought as pets for young families, the dogs are manic as their needs aren’t met. They need a
lot more than any other breed I have had (labs, GSD’s and terriers)

I agree with most of the posters. This is a sensible breeder. My mum breeds springers and is very cautious about selling to anyone with young children too. The children need to be old enough to be able to leave the puppy totally alone when needed and to be calm when the puppy is going nuts ir they just wind each other up and end up hurting each other. Both puppy and child can get really injured.

We got a show cocker when DS was almost 10. I’m really glad we waited that long because the puppy stage was really hard and boy was that pup a snappy little bugger. DS was old enough to understand what to do when the pup nipped and also old enough to join in the training sessions we went to.

We ended up with a really nice, well rounded dog but it took a lot of time and effort. I couldn’t have done it with a four year old child as well.

I lost my lovely dog about 18 months ago at the age of 13 and I still find random things around the place that he chewed while he was a puppy. Can’t bring myself to get rid of them.

She's not wondering if she's correct, she's wanting to argue her 'case', which implies she thinks she knows better than an expert who knows this breed well.

A little known fact about cocker Spaniels, especially working ones, is, that they actually very sensitive dogs. They can get stressed easily that's why so many are re homed by families with young children. Biting often is a stress response, not aggression.

This breeder obviously knows the breed and his lines.
There are far better family dogs out there than any type of Spaniel.

If they are working cockers that is fair enough.

This breeder is a damn good judge of character of nothing else

I can understand your disappointment however this is pretty sensible. Why not go to a rescue centre and see if they have any dogs that they feel are suitable for your family and other circumstances. I wish you the best of luck

They are being responsible, you don’t know anything about them and any previous experience they’ve had selling to someone with kids. Or they just don’t want to take the risk. Lots of dogs end up in rescue centres and they won’t want it for theirs. Perhaps look at an easier breed but don’t be upset at someone being a good breeder.