Heartache after saying goodbye-support thread 2

[Helplessandheartbroke]

Second support thread for fellow MNers suffering the loss of a fury friend. I lost my boy in December and I'm truly heartbroken 💔

Namethattunes
I am so sorry that you have lost your dog. I understand, because we lost ours last week, much too young.
It's very hard not to cry. I can't imagine. I irritate people when I cry so I am hiding it as best I can.
I will tell you how I'm getting through the days.
I talk to her in my head.
I often can't read or sleep. I'm afraid of losing a memory (i know that doesn't make much sense). I can write. I write the smallest things about her and it makes me feel I have something stored safe. I guess I am doing my ranting silently on paper, and my remembering.
I can knit, and the counting and patterning helps a bit.
I have friends who have lost dogs and understand and I read and read their messages and it makes me feel a bit less alone.
Can you draw? I wish I could. I would draw her.
I keep telling myself that she is safe now, and out of pain.
I hope your heart ache ends soon.

@Namethattunes I'm so sorry for your loss. Its truely heartbreaking. I've only just stopped blaming myself after almost 4 months. I'm also sorry for your surgery and the fact you can't grieve properly. Do you have rl support? Someone you can talk to? Drawing is a good idea. Also watching YouTube videos about grieving pets helped me but did make me cry. Speak here as often as you need. Our original thread was life saving for me. Literally x

@strawberriesarenot my boy would have been 7 in March. He went too soon. He only had 1 eye and would have lost his other had we not made the decision to end his suffering (a 7 stone dog with no eyes and daft as a brush wouldn't have coped well) I'm here for you x

How's everyone else? @Iheartmysmart @CeciledeVolangesdeNouveau? And friends x

Hi how is everyone x

My new little DDog was ill yesterday I panicked and made an emergency apptat the vet, I got in a terrible state over it. She was fine just a tummy ache but I couldn't go to vets alone, had DH come with me and I cried all the way home. I just felt overwhelmed with having another DDog get ill suddenly and I was terrified I'd enter the vets with my dog and leave without him like I did when I lost my boy. I guess I'm just not as healed as I thought I was. I've had even changed vets so I didn't have to go in the room where I lost him again

@Tara336 I'm glad ddog was ok. Sounds traumatic for you! Natural to worry after losing ddog 1 though. Hooe you can relax tonight

I lost my girl 2 weeks ago and its awful 😖 I keep seeing her face and questioning myself was it time, but in reality it was her time to sleep.

I'm so sorry for your loss. It is truely heartbreaking. Do you want to tell us about you girl? X

@Helplessandheartbroke she was a rescue, I got her when she was 22 months and she was the funniest little odd bod ever. Her previous owners were moving country, she had been in and out of kennels a lot of her young life so was super timid when out and about. She had been treated for mange and had part of her ear taken away bless her, she was still the most beautiful girl, she was also spay incontinent and came with a urine infection, maybe stress but it didn't take long to get her sorted and within a few days her little character and confidence started to come out. They said she didn't like toys well she took to raiding the existing toy box within a couple of days. My older boy soon became her crutch and introduced her to the world of beaches and woods, she was a mucky pup and loved diving in the muddiest of puddles haha. She was very well trained and came with various training certificates and manuals lol. I just wanted her to have fun and be happy.
She was with me through a lot of hard times, my Sister passing away and my divorce. She knew when I was out of sorts and if I cried she would put her face to mine as if to say I will take these tears for you. She did amazingly well up until last year, when she had vestibular episode, it was a bad one and she was really poorly. That wee sausage really pushed herself and got her wee trot back on and was up and about quite quickly. Within a couple of months she had another small episode and after that she didn't want to go a walk anymore, her legs were letting her down and she would keel over and look at me to say "wtf happened there Mum"
The night before she passed I heard a low moan and jumped up and my baby girl had gotten stuck on the floor and couldn't get up. I took her into bed with me at 3am and she stayed there until my friend, my vet, came to let her go over the bridge. She had a little sedative and was snoring which made me happy, and then she was gone.
I'll never have another dog like her, she was my companion and partner for nearly 13 years. I have 2 other brats and I adore them but nothing prepares you for when the time comes. I hate this part of being an animal lover. I've lost 2 cats and 2 dogs and they all stay in my heart.
We had a lovely business nearby that my vet uses that do a little cremation service. We got her back the next day and they had taken 2 paw prints and 2 nose prints and some of her beautiful fur for us. The fur is in a little potion bottle with her name engraved on a wooden heart. It was so beautiful and thoughtful of them.
Sorry for the long post, I feel so much better writing this.
I have so many wonderful memories of her and photographs and drawings.
Miss her so much. Thank you for reading xxx

@NippyCrab wow I could cry reading your loving post! She clearly meant a lot to you. Losing my boy is the hardest thing I've ever gone through. I couldn't face going through it again. Cherish those amazing memories x

@Helplessandheartbroke she meant the absolute world to me. It sounds daft but her nickname was Miss Velvet because she had the softest coat and always smelled amazing, x

Can I join? I had my beautiful old girl PTS almost 4 weeks ago, I was expecting it for a while as she had a bone tumour in her nose that was just growing and growing. We could have maybe waited a week or two longer but for who? She was already on 5 painkillers. So I fed her sausages right to the end and she died snuggled up to her Mum.

The hollow that’s been left in the house even though we have cats, she followed me everywhere, was my Velcro dog she had to be touching me. I just miss her so so much. I have a DD who has severe MH problems and she’s not coping well either.

We had to have our 12 yo lab put to sleep this morning. I’m going to miss her so much. She was my pal through some very tough times.

I keep thinking she’s going to wander in and rest her head on my knee for a cuddle.

So sorry for your loss @OfTheNight . I too had my 12 year old (golden retriever) put to sleep this morning. I've cried so much today and I'm exhausted. I keep looking round at her stuff and can't bear to move any of it 😥😥

I’m so sorry for you too @2Old2Tango . I know what you mean. I can’t stop crying. I just keep thinking about her.

@NippyCrab I hear you! And you don't sound daft at all. I sniffed ddogs blanket every day for about a month after he passed and it didn't smell great as he was due his Xmas groom the day he was pts but it brought me comfort.

@sweetkitty @OfTheNight @2Old2Tango I'm so sorry for your losses. Hopefully this thread can help you through this heartbreaking time. It certainly helped me. Please share whatever you're happy too and talk about your friends x

Thank you @Helplessandheartbroke

We got our girl as an 8 week old puppy but had been visiting her for a few weeks before. As a young dog she suffered pancreatitis and had a few short stays in the vet, getting well after severe d&v episodes. We managed her illness through a strict diet though.
A couple of years ago she began losing weight, though wasn’t on a diet. We had some bloods done at new year and they were inconclusive, but showed some irregularities with her liver. Vet wanted to do some scans but at 12 we didn’t want her sedated, and she was eating well and was still active.
This week the d&v started again. Straight off to the vet and got some meds. Friday she seemed a little better and ate her dinner but last night it began falling out of her again and, like Thursday, it was very yellow what was coming out. This morning she was exhausted and her back legs had given way. Vet seemed sure it was liver failure of some type, even without scans. She was so thin and weak we decided it was time to let her go before she got any worse. I thought I’d be strong but I sobbed like a child as she passed. So glad I was with her at the end and holding her though. I miss her so much 😢

@2Old2Tango @OfTheNight so sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved dogs too it’s so difficult isn’t it? We had months to prepare ourselves, we found out she had bone cancer last September and she was PTS 1st June so she survived all our expectations but it was still so hard. I was with her at the end too as she was my girl and I wanted to be there for her I think it’s the last kindness you can do for them no matter how difficult it is for you. I have her ashes back now and a lovely memorial with her collar and photo. Every time I pull into the driveway I am still looking for her 💔

@2Old2Tango bless you! And bless her she's definitely in a better place now over the rainbow Bridge.

@sweetkitty I still expected my boy there every time I opened the door for months. I was with him cuddling him and when his head went down I ran out and collapsed. I thought he had gone but he was just asleep at that point. I felt awful but thankfully dh was still there x

We had our beautiful JRT PTS yesterday and I'm so heartbroken. She'd had several strokes and seizures in the last month so it was the kindest thing to do but she was SO normal yesterday before that you could have almost believed she was fine.

She was my little best friend and baby for 12 years (we got her as a rescue when she was 3.5) and I just want to relive all those days again. I keep expecting to see her and I've thought I heard her so many times just this morning. She was so loved by not only our little family but everyone who met her. I'm so scared that people stop talking about her, like she never existed, because they don't want to upset us. I just want to remember her and all her quirks and sweetness forever.

May I join this thread too. We had our beautiful German Shepherd dog pts last night. He was 8.5yrs old and we'd had him sinceche was 12 weeks old. He had cancer in his jaw which had returned within six months after surgery. He went on a final walk yesterday and really struggled. I know it was the right decision but walking into the house tonight felt so strange without him. I commented on your previous thread @TheWorstWeek . Hope your precious dog had a peaceful send off .

Hi both,

I'm so sorry for your losses. It truely is heartbreaking and everyone on here understands how you're feeling. I hope all our furry friends are happily playing together over the other side. No longer in pain and discomfort 💔

Thanks very much @Helplessandheartbroke . It feels very empty at home. I came home today and have recieved a card and some forgot-me-not seeds from the vets which has made me quite sad. DH has also been off today and has hoovered. I must be bonkers to miss the dog hair on the carpet.

@freckletwin not bonkers at all. I used to moan about the hair everywhere and ddog following me to the loo! But I miss it all now x

@theworstweek it has been a week now and I still look for my ddog when I'm home. Just told a neighbour who was walking past with their dogs and they were shocked- their dogs are so much older so it feels a little unfair.

@freckletwin the same happened to me. One neighbour said 'but why did you have him pts he was so young' which made me feel like shit. He was almost 7 and not so young for his age and we didn't feel it was right to have a 7 stone dog with no eyes... or be in agony and blind the rest of his life. Its not fair at all x