I don't want my dog

[Notthisdog]

DP gave me a dog as a surprise birthday present in October. I've tried my best to love him and train him but there's always a nagging thought in the back of my mind that I don't really want him and I'm not sure what to do.

He is a good dog but he is not what I would have chosen for myself, the breed and gender are wrong for me.
The problem is, I would like a dog but just not him.

What do I do? The way I see it I've got 2 options. I can swallow my pride and admit it out loud, find him a new home and find a dog I would like in replacement.

Or I can carry on for another 15 years pretending to love him but really I'm only tolerating him.

Please don't judge me too harshly.

strange do you mean breed specific ones?

I am on a dog training one and a specific breed one. People ask all kinds of questions

OP if you are having specific training problems with your dog that make life more stressful it might be worth starting a new post on those. There are techniques and tips that are remarkably successful and it's easier to like a dog which is straight-forward to live with than one that causes you difficulties all day long.

Op, I have three dogs. A whippet x greyhound, a whippet and a er puggy type!

My whippets are perfection and I love them more than anything.

My daughter wanted a pug and I said no as they have too many health problems. I'd have got another whippet but she wanted a pug. I conceded and we got a pug with a little bit of jack Russell so that he looks like a pug body and colourwise but has longer legs and a longer face so has no breathing or wrinkle problems.

I didn't have the instant love that I got with my whippets. He is nothing like the whippets which are the perfect breed for me. At times he is an annoying little mouth on legs! He is only just over six months and at times I have secretly wished we didn't get him.

However, if he is naughty and gets told off he looks at me with his face that only a mother could love and looks so sad that I cannot help but warm to the little monster!

I've now openened my heart to him instead of subconsciously trying to distance myself from him and as time goes by I am finding him less annoying and am falling slowly in love with him.

As I said, its not the full on adoration I have with my whippets but the little bigger is slowly but surely getting their.

I've only ever treated him with love and affection and puppies can be frustrating but hard work.

I hope you can overcome your resentment and in time your dog be loved and appreciated for who he is.

My family.

Op, join a breed specific group, it will help

I love that picture Tate

Good on you, Notthisdog. It's not easy to be lumbered with a pet that you haven't bonded with, but fair play to you for persevering.

Tate, your ugly little critter sounds adorable!

And it's not easy for those working in dog rescue (referring back to a previous post). My mum is involved (in a Staffie specific one), and some of what she sees makes her lose her faith ever so slightly in human nature.

MightyMug - can i just ask if you agree with people getting a ddog they have no idea about? What would you recommend? Is it better to just get any old ddog and find out what its like once you have committed to it and discover you can't cope?

I too am very saddened by the awful cases that end up in rescues, and would be very jaded by the whole experience i'm sure.

staffies were 'all the rage' ,then dumped in huge numbers and now its the latest fad thats supporting puppy farming, and i do understand why people are really upset by whats happening to ddogs being x-bred for silly names and no idea what animals will result in terms of health primarily, but also temperament, very importantly, and not to forget looks.

I don't think everyone should be happy about all thats going on with thoughtless ddog buying because it is always the ddog that ends up suffering.

Shriek I'm not sure why you are asking me that question. I've read back through my posts and I'm confused why you think that was what I was implying.

What I meant was that people are giving the OP a hard time for not liking her dog because of its breed and saying that if she is a dog lover she should like any dog. Then on the other thread people are berating that OP for choosing a 'difficult' breed i.e. breed does matter.

No, I think breed is crucial and in many ways DH and I haven't got the breeds we may have chosen as we couldn't cope with the amount of walking and grooming they would need need, so we have two dogs that fit really well into our lifestyle.

I feel for you completely OP. There are a few dog breeds that I like, but there are an Awful lot that I would not have in the house. For instance, my friend has a working collie as a pet. It never stops all day, is like a coiled spring , ready to go all the time. Stares at its owner all the time waiting for a signal. That would drive me potty! (shouldn't be a pet, hasten to add). Getting a dog should be a long process, picking the right type for you. Your partner got it horribly wrong. The only thing wrong with OP is that she didn't turn it straight away. Good luck OP xxxx

sorry MightMug my mistake ...

i do disagree with the idea that a 'ddog' is a 'ddog' a generic 'thing' that everyone must connect with. I would never be able to work with all ddogs, i just wouldn't but i do think when 'ddogs' go through rescues they do become just that, a generic thing for many, not all.

I don't understand ddogs that spend their days and lives endlessly yapping and tearing around stressed to death, it doesn't look any fun for the ddog and i don't want any part of it, and just annoy the feck out of everyone around them. some understand these ddogs and know how to work them, like the mention of the coiled spring collie.

ddogs are absolutely about their differences.

I am so upset about the lack of thought that goes in getting any animal, just buying 'something', often because its trending and just all the rage, hence so many staffies, and many other breeds of ddogs that are bought into families that they are totally inappropriate for.

great sadness and disservice to loyal best friends

Why don't people do any more than just say oh look theres a nice one we'll have that then? I know many do, but many don't.

How does the message get out there? There used to be an add campaign, a really strong one about not buying dpups for Xmas and now i wonder how many that read this ddoggie forum and have actually done that and wonder what all the fuss is about

I think this thread has been a good eye-opener for this debate around suiting ddogs to owners that can manage them.