Should I marry a murderer? Netflix

[IAmKerplunk]

Has anyone watched this? I have just finished it. Honestly I feel mixed about Caroline. Don’t want to say too much in case others haven’t finished it.

I remember the story being reported but didn’t know how much else went on in the lead up to the trial.

Thanks for the thread @IAmKerplunk 🙂

Binge watched this last night. We were shouting at the TV! Wild.

I agree @CuntOfTheLitter. I’m struggling to understand why she agreed to make this doc. Or why her family and friends agreed to be in it. Why draw attention to the whole sad and shocking saga? Seems the worst decision of a litany of terrible decisions. Starting with driving to an horrifically remote location to meet a strange man with guns off Tinder 😶.

Her motivation appears to be to expose the failings of the police (debatable it does that). But she comes out of it so poorly. Particularly by allowing her almost constant documenting of her life (via teenage-style Snaps) to be broadcast. In fact, the doc comes across as an extension of that need to share.

@Triskellion75 Goodness knows how Tony Parsons’ family feel about it.

I wonder how much she was paid for this - she had ALL the compelling content - the case has been covered in many media formats already so the only unique part was her SM content and her angle.

I think she might have wanted to clarify her situation as it must be hard to establish personal and professional credibility when she was associated with the case - to stop any rumours and ‘clear’ her name.

I loved the wild scenery and the crazy love story combined with her staid job.

I was also wondering if the videos were acted as she looked so different and I was also struck by how it was only 6 weeks (6 weekends?) they had been together when they decided to get married and she somehow had a dress immediately.

I didn’t understand how he didn’t suspect her of turning them in.

She was reckless and wild - but also fearless, driven and heroic. Lots of times I thought she was an exciting and exceptional person at other times I found her jarring - suspicious, dramatic and narcissistic.

But she was burdened with a situation she didn’t asked for and in the end did the right thing without support and put herself at huge mental and physical risk.

@EdithBond without her actions, the poor man's body would never have been found. I imagine the family are grateful to her.

With regards to the all the filming. Some people just do that. I have a friend in her 40s who films her life everyday. She has virtually no followers but you’d think she was a celebrity. She enjoys doing it and it acts like a diary. She’s lovely btw so no shade!

People also forget this was during Covid. I have way more footage during that time as we made films of us doing all sorts of stuff as a way of connecting with family and friends - I’ve got home schooling, cooking, trying on clothes I’d bought online. Boring projects I did around the house.

she was reckless, she also did the right thing and put herself in danger and kept recording in his presence. Can you imagine how hard it is to turn in those recording's knowing there’s only one place it could come from? Once he told her she was extremely vulnerable and from the BBC documentary it sounds like there was a whole community who knew how to keep things quiet. It was known locally they had done it.

i hope she does make money from it and also given he only got 12 years I’d think being as public and well known as possible would be a more effective insurance policy than relying on the police.

From the bbc documentary it was in no way certain they’d get a murder conviction even with her. Some of the evidence suggests that the poor victim would not have survived even with emergency assistance as it would take an hour to reach them and the pathologist report suggests he was not alive for that long and I don’t think Caroline had any recordings about these details. I hate that distinction.

The thing that made me most angry about the court case were the apologies made by the brothers (in the bbc documentary). And their tears. Repulsive. Theire only comments throughout all the interviews were ‘no comment’. They were only sorry they were caught.

Sorry, I meant the Netflix doc, rather than her decision to report the crime.

She’s definitely was vulnerable but that was also to her poor judgment and drink and drugs.
I can see why the prosecution never labelled her a vulnerable witness considering her upbringing, family, education and career. She didn’t fit the narrative.

We watched the first episode and half of the second. We found Caroline too annoying to persevere with it.

Oh I see. Yes, I always think that when these sort of documentaries appear but there has been a good podcast and TV programme from the victim's perspective already. I think Caroline has a valid story to tell.

@Justusethebloodyphone I believe it’s standard legal advice to provide a written statement via a solicitor then answer ‘no comment’ to all questioning.

But Caroline says she was taken aback by their lack of empathy and remorse.

She clearly wasn't behaving rationally and her footage of herself that day seems to show she was in psychosis.
I imagine if she HAD turned up to court in that state then the whole case would have been at risk of being thrown out due to her being a totally unreliable witness. She wouldn't have been able to give clear or coherent testimony that day and possibly the twins' convictions were actually easier to secure based on her previously written and recorded evidence than if she'd appeared in that condition.

Does anyone know why the 2 twins' sentences were so different when they were both involved from the beginning?

This appears to be the crux of the doc. That anyone in a relationship with a criminal, whose witness testimony is vital evidence for the prosecution, should be regarded, supported and protected as a vulnerable person. Because it undoubtedly really messes their head up, whoever they are.

I’m guessing because one was drink-driving and caused the fatal collision. Whereas the other was an accessory.

If she doesn’t turn up there’s basically no case. The lesser charge gets him locked up at least.

I found him infuriating too, especially when he insisted on referring to her as ‘Dr Muirhead’ as though he was trying to suggest that because she was well-educated and intelligent, that she should’ve handled it better & didn’t need any support 🙄

Agree. Her demeanour on that day would have totally lost the case and that was before the defence lawyer had declared that he was going to rip her credibility to shreds (wouldn’t have been difficult) as an unreliable witness due to her substance misuse and possibly MH issues. I was very worried she would harm herself at the waterfall.

From Sandy’s perspective though, I get feeling the need to offload to his partner about what happened, but telling her exactly where the body was buried?! What an IDIOT. Who trusts someone they’ve known for a few months, ‘in love’ or not, with those details?! Bet Robert is absolutely raging

One was the driver, so he caused the accident

Because only one of them was driving so could be found guilty of culpable homicide. The other was guilty 'only' of hiding the body I think.

I agree, and I think this also shines a light on how rather than sending her for mental health they locked her in a cell. If anything that needs to be addressed. Where they worried that giving her help would make her a less reliable witness despite the recordings? If so it shows the focus wasn't in the right place - she had nothing to do with the crime and found evidence the police never would, including how remorseless they both were and their "them or me" mentality.

So do we believe that the plea bargain which was initially rejected was revisited because Caroline didn’t turn up?

Did she know which waterfall that the bike was under or was she just in a psychotic state?

I just watched this, and had not heard of it before.

Caroline’s friend said at the beginning that her previous relationship was challenging. Which makes me think controlling/abusive. So she was clearly feeling low and rushed into a relationship. She appears to have been easily drawn into drinking and doing drugs early on, and her friend said she’d be the least likely person to do drugs before.
But the police wouldn’t have realised and she was still turning up at work at that point so on the surface they thought she was ok.

No doubt the police made huge mistakes, but I do wonder if she would have properly engaged with support and advice if it was offered? I think she was too in the grip of things. I also think that if she hadn’t been told what actually happened by the other twin and asked to help move the body she would have taken a LOT longer to tell the police.

At the end she said she’s in a new relationship, which just seems crazy to me but hopefully this one goes well.

I wondered this too. I very much got the feeling she had regretted it at points with some of her remarks, coupled with the fact she kept going back to see him. I felt maybe her parents convinced her to call the police, and wonder if without them she would have reported it at all.

I think she was roughly 30 when it happened? 35 in documentary? Her behaviour was very immature and reminded me of a teenager. Undoubtedly some vulnerabilities there.

Totally agree with this!

Didn’t they offer her advice? Which was to stay with her parents and to let them know if there were any security concerns. But she clearly didn’t take their advice.

I’m not clear what the police can do if someone chooses to continue in a relationship with someone arrested, and being investigated, for a crime, even if they’re a key prosecution witness.