The Real Housewives of Cheshire

[rockingthelook]

Whar can I say....even more of a pantomime than I was expecting, bigger cars, tacky clothing (lauren in squeaky latex trousers!) , awful make up and more contrived stories than ever, it doesn't disappoint

Doesn’t appear to be a reunion at all maireas

Note to the producers…. Jersey won’t fill the hole.

A Wardy wedding series might

Too true about Jersey
Keeping Up With The Wards was probably the ambition....

KUWTW must surely be preferable to the rhoc/rhoj mince we’ve been subjected to I feel.

And I love me a wedding.

My born again spinster self lives vicariously through others

Weddings are always good to watch, the dresses, the flowers, the music etc
Whatever Dawn has got up to, she's certainly very entertaining. What we don't want is dull.
Dull is what we've been getting.

You forgot the drama, hysterics, meltdowns, breakups and makeups

I’m finding dull isn’t making my creative critique juices maireas

I need full on drama. I do. (Not in real life - just on here!)

Keep me posted if you find anything good!

I will do!

Likewise please!

🌻

[ambles into thread; nonchalantly whistling].

Not that I’m that t’mithered, but wtf happened to last episode?

Were we the only ones watching so ITV schedulers pulled?

Not bothered - honest [slinks off]

You are bothered - yes you are!

So I will leave you with a snippet.

Think I have read something about celeb boxing.

Rach slugga Lugo v Leanne Boffa Brown.

Team Brown. 🥊

🛎 🛎 round one 😀

Shame it isnt Nicole v Lacklystra. Though Lacklystra would need comedy boxing gloves (a la Kenny Everett) to accommodate the talons. And there ain’t a pair of boxer shorts in the world accommodating that hump.

No. I wasn’t constantly hitting ‘refresh’ (Ctrl F7); how very dare you?

Team Leanne completely!!!

Would like her in the Ring with Manhands. Can imagine latter running round the ring squealing whilst Leanne uses every trick in the book learned ‘Dancing in Gentleman Clubs’ to pirouette out, gracefully cartwheel across Ring and land a good ‘un; a la Purdey in “The Avengers”. I think I may got Rules a bit effed up but should be Real Housewives MMA - can you imagine Ampika?!! She’d do it in clad in nowt but a thong and glitter.

Anyone else worry how Lysteria performs intimate ablutions??

I do have an effing life!! Yes, that’s to you at the back!!!

[mutters to self and goes back to watching “Marrying Millions” secure in knowledge haven’t got sucked into “Love Island”, yet]

The ablutions? Carefully - I should imagine…

I haven’t been sucked into LI either. Though I’ve seen one or two over the years. It interferes with too many other things and I struggle with enough hours in the day as is.

Plus that sippycup sooking is as irritating as ‘gottatext’.

Need a MAFS before I burst…

Yup. A MAFS would be good however, will runaway screaming at first mention of ‘he’s my kinda snack’.

The fact that we know this type of slang is shameful enough . . . [sticks self in Harry Potter under stairs cupboard - with great difficulty, given stuffed to the brims with crap - rocks back and forth, moaning softly and repeats “I must get a Cat, I must get a Cat”]

How are you doing mrscat?

Are you managing to think of him with smiles through your tears? 🐈 🥲

I’ll join you in your cupboard and reminisce x

Thanks very much @SheldonesqueTheBstard

We talk about him everyday - sniff . We adopted a massive Bumble Bee that lived in our Japonica but not the same - ‘yes’ as in he didn’t want cuddles but ‘no’ as in couldn’t train him up to be a complete and utter Bastard and tool him up.

🥲

Sheldog is oft mentioned too. It is hard when they’ve buggered off with a piece of your heart. Shame that the buggering off didn’t involve my excess 4 stone…

I have a new charge that I get to walk every day. I love the wee thing deeply. But as for having one of my own? Too soon. (And not entirely fair on a hound with the shifts I currently work)

I love a bee. And a japonica.

I have a resident moth. It doesn’t wag and seems reluctant to move away. And is a pain in the arse fannying around at bedtime.

Still. It is company 🤷‍♀️

Anyhoo - where has this effing programme gone?? Honest, not bothered @SheldonesqueTheBstard -
MrCat and I are too engaged in flinging woo at each other to be bothered into plugging the tele in and working out Freeview.

We’ve designed our teeny garden to be Bee friendly however, the Beast Plant that’s growing out of BastardCat’s grave is well and truly scary . MrCat has locked patio doors and hidden keys because I feel compelled to go out there (I hear the plaintive meow ‘Feed me’; on repeat), particularly on a full moon, armed with a nice sharp, Global knife . . .

I love that BastardCat is going full on growin mode for da bees. 🐝 🐝 🐈

He is trying to sneak his way back into the house by the only way he knows how 🥲😍

Me and the folks (well me really) are bee friendly - lots of happy bee/butterfly/insect plants and flowers and a big patch where it is wild and wonderful.

We have water stations for bees too and have pigs under the shed.

Ours is a happy garden. Sounds like yours is too. More sowith your woo boy 🥰

Bastardcat ate the last episode

Heh heh. He probably did!

Ps. PM’d you

Answered 🪴

I’ve only just caught up on this season. This thread is hilarious, sums it all up pretty well. Two things come to mind for me.

Firstly, I think I sometimes forget my age. I’ve spent half the time thinking “these women are older than me, they should know better”. And then I realise they are all a fair bit younger than me.

Secondly, most of the RH franchises have “recurring guests”. I think Cheshire came up trumps with their guests this season. The Alpacas! They were in three episodes and stole the show for me. Gorgeous faces (no surgery), gorgeous attire (again, natural) and they freaked half the women out - bonus!

Don’t think I will bother with the next series. As someone said upthread, the earlier ones were interesting as it really seemed to be about interactions with friends, whereas now it’s totally manufactured shite.

Anyone still watch this?

Caught it Mon - what's Lystra all about. So much silicone and this nails! Dreadful