claire verity part 2

[Lorayn]

Too many bloody posts on the other one, I cant post!!!

Pregnantgrr
Me too
Think I've put all the child devp theories in to one bit of my brain and mixed them up.

Think I'm losing it have now lost purse.

Sigh

Whilst we have our special academic hats on the programme makes me think of the theories of Marsha Linehan on the development of borderline personality disorder. She reckons that if a child experiences an emotionally invalidating environment (and I can't think of anything much more invalidating than being left to scream in your pram outside for hours) it won't learn to regulate its emotions and can wind up with a personality disorder.

Spot on mamadoc!

I telephoned Channel 4 and asked them to take the programme off the air.

She is basically advised people to abuse their children through neglect.

As for that mother with a glass of wine??? It was more like a third of a glass.

Now, we mostly all drink wine but advising a mother of a new born to drink a third of a glass of wine whilst ignoring their cries is frankly irresponsible.

Picture this... 'young mum used to binge drinking thinks this is okay..has a glass of wine..then another...then one to drown out the baby's cries..then falls asleep and doesn't hear her baby choking through the montior'.

Babies could die because of her advice...

Mamadoc I was wondering about attachment disorders and what causes them. Don't know too much about them but did work with a wee child who had behavioural problems thought to be caused by lack of mother bond.

Link to petition the PM to protect children from dangerous parenting shows
petitions.pm.gov.uk/parentingshows/

babyramone- i'm sure i used to quite clever.

'be' quite clever.

dear god. It's Hollyoaks and The Sun for me from now on.

tiktok (this is way back from Wednesday) I stand corrected. Claire Fox did say "bottles" not "doctors". Still didn't think her attitude was very helpful though-- my suspicion is that the problem of nipple confusion is exaggerated in some pro-bf quarters.

Interesting to have a second watch of the show though-- did anyone catch on CV's whiteboard the instruction "No visitors in the first week"? Guess that doesn't include a Channel 4 film crew.

I watched with my dmil (who has raised 10 children) and her attitude from the outset was that the idea that there was one "correct" method for raising all children, even within the same family, was ludicrous. So I'm with those who are decrying the veneer of "experiment" on this programme as a total sham.

mybabysinthegarden - I agree, her attitude was not helpful, and her skills were poor, too.

Excellent point about the visitors!!

My two youngest are 14 and 10 and I have a freind whose children were both born within a fortnight of mine. She did the Truby King method with her two as "my mum did it and it works so I'm doing it". She is by nature a very regimented person, like to have things just so and everyhting at a set time

It was horrible - she used to visit me every friday morning and from 10 till 11 we would listen to her son cry while he waited for hsi bottle.

Recently we went on holiday with them and our 10 and 14 year olds. Mine were off charging round the campsite, making freinds, and other than meals, ours always being haphazard affairs, we hardly saw them.

Her two were with her and her dh constantly, they never seemed to make freinds (they go to the same school as mine and are both real loners), even when the four adults were having a drink and playing cards at night, her two had to be with us, where as mine were playing pool/ping pong/football or generally jsut hanging out with mates.

Perhaps they would have been like this if they hadn't had a regimented time as a baby, and my friend is one of the kindest women you could ever wish to meet, but it does all seem a very strange coincidnce.

I am still thinking about this awful programme now and am worried that those mums are also going to suffer some kind of PND if they're not given the opportunity to bond. I think social services should be paying a visit personally. My parents fostered when I was younger and I know of incidents of children taken into care for being neglected in a less brutal manner than this.

I watched this last night, i HAD to find out what you were all talking about and MY GOD what an awful awful woman. (how can she be such an expert when she has no children - am i missing something?)

I am SO very glad that i didnt see this programme before i had DS - i'd have been SO confused!

the only way I can bear to think about this programme is to hope that they faked it, and that moments after they shot the footage of mum weeping while listening to her baby crying, she got up, elbowed Claire Whatsit out of the way and went to pick up her baby while her DH booted Claire Eejit out of the front door.

Clare Verity, I'm sure you meant bottle but I agree totally with you!

Sorry if this point has been posted already, but I feel truely sorry for the parents who had CV as their mentor. I cannot for the life of me think what posessed them to opt for her, esp as they already have one child: it's not as if they're going into this 'blind' as such. I couldn't watch it for more than 15 mins, it made me so churned up inside. Whatever their reasons for doing this, they have missed out on precious bonding and touching with their baby that they will never get back. I wonder how long it will take them to realise that?

Dd1 was a very 'easy' baby and took to everything with no problems: eating, sleeping, etc. and we parented by instinct, but she made it very easy for us. Dd2 has been a different story and has had trouble sleeping from day 1. We have been delirious from lack of sleep some nights! But we also would never have contemplated a regime like CV's for the sake of a better night's sleep, because the one thing we learned from having dd1 was that those first few months are absolutely exquisite- sharing the love you have with your baby is one of the best feelings anyone can ever have and we feel priviledged to have had that experience twice now. It won't happen again (dh has had the snip!) but I will always treasure that way having a newborn make me feel. CV has never have that - how can those parents therefore have trusted her to that extent?? It's utter utter madness.

this is her website and you must not laugh at the airburshing that's gone on in that photo....

this page has a glowing reference from one of the mothers in the programme.

It is possible to fit a baby into a routine, but the evidence is that harsh methods have a price to pay later (see Sue Gerhardt's book 'Why Love Matters: How affection shapes a baby's brain).

That photo is so badly airbrused the two halves of her face look like they belong to different people. The nose is bigger on one side than the other, eyes are different, etc.

She looks in her 20s in that photo and she must be in her 60s?

typo in the 3rd paragraph

that is the farking least of it

grrrrrrrrrr

I would guess she is in her late 40s, stripey.

lulumama, the whole site is poorly written, and thank goodness parents are not paying her to teach their babies spelling and grammar

"this page has a glowing reference from one of the mothers in the programme."

The babies in the photograph on that page look terrified. This woman with her vicious methods needs to be stopped.

Her website says nothing of any qualifications she may have, no police checks, nothing of her background..v v scary

The hairdryer effect on her blonde flowing locks must have cost a few bob

Good point, mumof2sons....there's no indication she has been thorugh any training programme at all.

I thought you had to be CRB checked if you were working for someone as a carer for a child, but maybe I have got this wrong.

i know the spelling is a cheap shot, but at £1000 per client or whatever she charges, surely she could afford a proof reader

"Claire is a big advocate of breast feeding ..." it says on her website.

HOW can she dare to say that???????
???????????????????????????????????????????

Hi I don't know if anyone has posted this link petitions.pm.gov.uk/parentingshows/?signed=b620738.ea93b2
it is a downing street petition against the Bring up Baby "experiment", sign, sign, sign xx