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Original poster

There She Goes - anyone?

260 replies

hazeyjane · 16/10/2018 22:39

Anyone watching?

OP posts:
Valasca · 24/10/2018 09:53

Polly, fine that you don’t agree but what I read was a thread where for a time, the only active discussion was to pile on and twist someone’s few words and derail the thread. It isn’t a reflection of the entire thread and it doesn’t matter if it’s only 2 or 3 posters, when it’s the majority of the posters at that time.

Partridgeamongstthepigeons · 24/10/2018 10:30

Just watched the second episode... absolutely spot on yet again- right down to not wanting to see normal children. Loved when the mum tried to outwit Rosie- exactly what I have done on many occasions and also loved the fact the mum got excited when she realised Rosie could strategise, I remember clinging onto these things to give me hope.

placemats · 24/10/2018 11:19

It's amazing they have stayed together as a couple.

I now wish I hadn't watched it (delayed it but did so on catch up) as it hit the nail on the head regarding thinking your baby is different. I wish I could have been more outspoken.

But of course I'm glad I watched it. Brings it all back and it's a very good depiction.

placemats · 24/10/2018 11:21

It's a real conundrum regarding wanting a normal child when you already have a normal child. And YES, I would have changed my boy then. Not now though - he's 17.

Original poster
hazeyjane · 24/10/2018 16:58

Well, watched it today on catch up

Feel a bit sad that this thread somehow turned into a wrangle, so will probably switch to your thread on sn chat, Wonder.

Hope everyone on this thread carries on enjoying it.

OP posts:
JustDanceAddict · 24/10/2018 17:32

Just watching the first ep. It’s very emotional.

PainUni · 24/10/2018 22:17

I found this difficult to watch. It must be so so utterly exhausting. And you've really got to have a solid relationship for your relationship to survive that?

I thought the parents were trying really really hard to make life as normal as possible for their son.

WonderBoy · 25/10/2018 00:11

Thanks to the pp and just to clarify that the linked thread is for parents and siblings of DC with severe learning disabilities and/or complex needs, and similar others, for whom There She Goes is personally relevant. HTH. TIA.
Flowers

MisstoMrs · 25/10/2018 08:21

@hazeyjane and @wonderboy I hope you don’t leave this thread completely, although obviously you must do what’s right for you.

Personally I think this thread is a good place for parents of SN and NT children to discuss what is an important programme that brings out some really important issues.

I will certainly check back in after I have seen the second episode.

IntentsAndPorpoises · 25/10/2018 09:04

Just watched episode 2. The toothbrushing! That is very familiar. DD has ASD (what would be called high functioning- but I hate that term) and she hates brushing her teeth. It is often a two person job, althogh I will admit to being more like DTDad and letting it slide sometimes in the big battle that is "getting out of the house" in the morning. Sometimes you have to choose your battles and I can take her to school without her teeth brushed, but I can't take her naked, so I battle on clothes!

It made me think about how much we weigh up short term and long term goals and gains with DD. Like I usually know that 30 mins of minecraft is going to store up problems later when I try to coax her away, but in that moment I just want a minute of peace!

I was someone involved in wrangling, so I'm sorry. I was feeling particularly sensitive that day to the "don't know how you do it" and sibling comments. DS (9) does have a different childhood to some of his peers, but it is what it is. And this week his teacher described as kind and patient, with not a mean bone in his body. He's brilliant with DD, and tolerates a lot- he is sometimes the target of her violent meltdowns, although obviously we do everything possible to avoid that.

So it is hard when you are seeing something so similar to your family life on TV to have someone comment that the sibling is having a crap childhood.

HerculesTheBerkules · 25/10/2018 09:56

I think it's good they show David Tennant's character struggling. It's human. I think if they'd shown two people who worked seamlessly as a team from day 1 with no doubts or annoyance it would have made everyone in a similar situ feel like shit. Also there would be nothing to watch.

Figgygal · 26/10/2018 12:44

I have found it really eye opening just how relentless their lives are and the impact it has on the brother.
Great script and acting too

MySkirtHasPockets · 28/10/2018 17:47

Can't wait for the next episode of this, it's brilliant.

I also wondered whether the dad would have an affair with the colleague but hoping not. DT is doing a great job of playing the dad, it would be been so easy for him to just be an out and out arsehole but he does a fab job of making his character more complex than that.

Helps that I love Jessica Hynes... Though I always want to call her Daisy (from the Spaces days!).

WonderBoy · 29/10/2018 11:21

Just a reminder that episode 3 of 5 is on tomorrow night (Tuesday 30 Oct) at 10pm.

What Rosie Wants - A trip to the swimming pool ends in disaster when Rosie decides she hates it. Mum Emily wonders if it's just because she wanted to do something else.

Episodes 1&2 available on catch up.

Original poster
hazeyjane · 29/10/2018 15:11

@hazeyjane and @wonderboy I hope you don’t leave this thread completely, although obviously you must do what’s right for you.

Ah thankyou - I was feeling a little oversensitive last week, due to massive sleep deprivation!

Looking forward to tomorrow's episode.

OP posts:
WonderBoy · 30/10/2018 21:42

Just a quick reminder that it's curtain up tonight in about 15 minutes Smile

Partridgeamongstthepigeons · 31/10/2018 08:15

Watched it last night- brilliant again! For our DS it's not women on treadmills but flushing toilets on YouTube- unbelievable what some people flush down their toilets actually 

tiredgirly · 31/10/2018 10:00

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AamdC · 31/10/2018 10:54

Im.guessing you dont have a child wirh severe learning disabillities @tiredgirly ? How would you diacipline a non verbal child with limited understanding ?

LadyLuna16 · 31/10/2018 10:55

Fucking hell tiredgirly. I don't really know where to start.

Disciplining children who have a cognitive disability is a whole different kettle of fish to disciplining NT children.

Gawp at women exercising? It was what Rosie wanted to do. Who gives a shit? Let her watch people running - it makes her happy. Are you really lacking in empathy to the extent that people need to all be the same?

Rosie has no concept of what is OK and not OK according to social rules. Her parents are trying their best in a difficult situation.

Do you know what makes raising a child with a disability hard? People who judge. People who can only see the world from their point of view and judge your parenting accordingly.

Re the sibling. 1) Not sure why you feel sorry for him? He seems to have a good relationship with his parents. 2) If you are seeing something that I am not seeing what would you suggest the parents do differently exactly.

Although honestly I think you are quite enjoying winding people up here.

For once there is something on TV that shows the reality of raising a child with a disability. Not the Children in Need special with the disabled children that everyone love for being plucky, but the hard, daily grind of raising a child with a disability and all you see is parents indulging her and a son who is somehow to be pitied. Look again. Seriously, stop your judging and look at hear what people who live this are telling you. Stop judging and try some kindness and empathy.

ThanksItHasPockets · 31/10/2018 10:57

Do people really watch comedies about families expecting to see exemplary parenting? The whole point is that the humour lies in the varying degrees of ineptitude and in the exaggeration compared to real life. Outnumbered and Motherland used exactly the same trope.

WonderBoy · 31/10/2018 11:11

I'm not going to enter into an argument with the pp tiredgirly, or anyone similar trying to defend her. I am too far along the journey and too (genuinely tired and) busy caring around the clock for an adored severely disabled older DC to waste my time going over the same old tired ground with people like this. I will say only that it is important that her views are challenged from a place of experience or otherwise, (and that is certainly not the same as attacking or ganging up). Other experienced pps were not being oversensitive previously, they were just being sensitive and then too kind by blaming themselves and apologising. Sensitive is good.

Other people who are not 'living the life' are watching the programme and commenting to learn and be supportive of those of us who are. Healthy, respectful queries and debate is good. However this poster seems determined to hold on to her ignorant views and express them here, not listening or learning from the writer and those pps with experience, and to upset people with her insults, goad and belittle with her use of the hmm? emoji and, in this context, disablist language - I won't repeat it.

'To stare, open-mouthed, rudely and stupidly': The only people who were doing this in the programme were the adult strangers at the swimming pool towards Rosie and her family. IRL perhaps some people are doing this at the programme too.

AamdC · 31/10/2018 11:25

What they do at ds special school , is reward behavipur that they want , its to encourage desirable behaviour , not bribe , so if ds sits down and looks at a book for a few minutes worh a teacher he gets to listen to Taylor swift , (not nmusic i would choose but he loves it!) As it motivates him, similarly another child might get to use the Ipad or get blueberries etc as thats what motivates them

Partridgeamongstthepigeons · 31/10/2018 11:30

Tired girly wow you are lucky to live in such ignorance eh?

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