Sleb Masterchef is BACK

[Halsall]

@ellenanora5 @squoosh @GrouchyKiwi @fourquenelles @schadenfreude OH GOSH DAMN @EVERYBODY whose name I can’t quite dredge up right now from the depths of my addled brain, gather ye hither for all the traditional food-based fun and frolics. Tonite. BBC1. 8pm. Be there

Even the way she says “nap” is horrific

That s what it's like to work for a living, Slebs - aren't you glad you get paid for fuck all?

Apple Betty is a staple Slimming World pudding. Bread, apples and egg custard combo like a sweet omelette thingie.

Giant must need to eat every hour or so

“A bit of an underdog”

Keef looks twitchy - do you think he needs a Strong Drink?

Oh god, the guest judges......I don't remember the bloke.

Ahhh Sophie.

"Cooking for Gregg and I". I thought we'd fixed that last year, Torode.

ellen I might have to iPlayer it.

Pretty boy says "I'm feeling like a bit of an underdog". Hahahahaha. I laughed so hard I just dribbled the milk from my coco pops down my nightie.

Fuck me he’s doing the stupid peeling again. Hold it in your hand you massive dick head

If Kathy Burke could kill 4 "chefs", she would.

“Cheese and biscuits girl”

You’ve not been a girl for about 50 years, love

Wheres Donny, we need Donny

I remember him Halsall but only because I had to ask on here who he was.

Sophie was great

Mrs Overall is 60, btw.

The guinea fowl lorry has arrived.

"Cooking for Gregg and I". I thought we'd fixed that last year, Torode

There are goldfish with better attention spans Grouchy

The guinea fowl are taking a bettering this year . . .

Rhubarb is foul, but Martin is lovely isn't he.

I've decided to pretend Carol isn't there, she annoys me so much.

Don't push too far your beans are slimy in my hand

I laughed so hard I just dribbled the milk from my coco pops down my nightie.

Now I want cocopops

He's not making that bloody pudding again, is he?

Idaho

FUCK OFF GREGGGGG.

(Is this the first of the season?)

Love Sophie, but she always looks on the verge of tears.

Keith's menu is not impressive.

There are goldfish with better attention spans
True fact, Schaden, true fact.

Keith is doing the same desert, idiot

Don't Grouchy, it will only annoy you, you have a hard evening don't make it worse, it's not worth it