X Factor - Best of British Week. I think we'll need it.

[RudolphUcker]

Tis I btw, Sue. In Christmas guise.

So it's Dear Old Blighty week. This is a new thing and promises to be second in mawkishness and misplaced patriotism only to the MiliWives screeching Jerusalem at the Pride of Britain awards, wearing GingerSpice outfits, straddling a Gurkha apiece. In bowler hats. that may not have happened but I could see it

The Babyshits are paying tribute to the armed forces, in particular Pretty Shit's brother - who is a Marine fingers crossed for photos

Rylan is doing a mash-up. I am hoping for I Vow To Thee My Country mixed with London Town.

Nothing on the rest. Nanfucker doing 'Grandma, we love you'? Pinhead being angsty and 'urban'? Same old, same old

Oh, and Wand Erection are doing a one-off performance, in a cunning bid to get their entire fan base watching the Baby Shits.

Any predictions?

Jessie, I think the fringe is from a Lego man

He's making it his own folks.

And now Sue comes up with a great one as well!

Hate this song

I can't stand Chow Mein (the singer, I quite like the CHinese dish). THis is bloody nasal and breathy with poor diction. Again.

I heard Jennifer Anniston, started shouting 'wtf has she got to do with music' Was Hudson.

WE HAVE THE GOSPEL CHOIR, PEOPLE.

Oooh TheGreensSpeech is wellgood

Gary will say he sings it better than Robbie. Which, to be fair, is true.

This song always makes me cry!

Why is he dressed like a used tampon? Anyone?

Lego ones aren't even that straight nancy. Chow Mein's is truly a phenomenon.

He is singing this in a serial killer way. And doing the annoying warbling.

Overrated

I could tread on a cat and it would yowl better than Apeface. It would have the added bonus of not winking at me, or being shoehorned into a suit four sizes too small.

Ja-pain. Can't stand his wailing!

Choir! BINGO!

Ah I do love him, he is so lovely, he is my little Fisher Price Man of Loveliness. I may actually vote for him if he gets to the final.

That was a terrible ending.

Am i the only one who thinks that nicole is makin herself like a total trollop with the barely masked references to hard cocks each week? its pathetic and makes my teeth itch

WTF does it mean. Loving angels instead of what? Hating them? Disliking them a bit?

CuriousMama, that's like when I ran on here to give people the scoop that DP's car valet was engaged to Jennifer Aniston. Turned out he'd mixed her up with Jennifer Ellison

fucking HELL !

I love Jahmene.
I want to cuddle him and tell him everything is going to be OK.
In a motherly fashion of course.

Fireworks because its Divali on Tuesday.

Sorry, just delurked to show off....

that was really good, I would pay to hear him