Page 2 | Prom - he’s upset he’s going to miss it!

MeganM3 · 21/10/2024 13:37

He can't miss prom.

This is a chance to really celebrate his whole school journey - with his year group. And say goodbye to some of them. It's really a highlight event and the memories stay with you forever.

I would miss a lot of stuff for a holiday, but not this.

Your error, and I'm sure a solution can be found 😊 fly out later?

Ivehearditbothways · 21/10/2024 13:38

Why did you book for that week? It’s such a massive time at school for them during that whole month really.
You’ll have to move the holiday. You really really do have to. It’s just so unfair to make him miss it because you want to save a bit of cash.

TheWomanWithTheStick · 21/10/2024 13:38

You have to let him go to Prom. My DS16 was adamant the whole way through school that he was definitely NOT going to go, but towards the end of school I think he realised it was something he really should do and he went. He would have really regretted missing it. Please find a way to let him go!

Itsacrazyworldisntit · 21/10/2024 13:38

MinistryofThyme · 21/10/2024 12:54

I think one of you should stay behind and then fly out later with him.

This, then you are all happy ☺️

boredwithfoodprob · 21/10/2024 13:39

I also think they need to decompress at home a bit after exams finish. GCSEs are so full on!

TheWomanWithTheStick · 21/10/2024 13:42

boredwithfoodprob · 21/10/2024 13:39

I also think they need to decompress at home a bit after exams finish. GCSEs are so full on!

I agree with this. They need to sleep for a week!

HiccupHorrendousHaddock · 21/10/2024 13:45

You'll need to book extra flights to joing the rest of your family the day after prom, it's such a huge deal to the ones who want to go.

I had a mixed bag, one flatly refused and didn't regret it, one quite liked it, for one it was the most significant day of the summer and outweighed the holiday and a wedding she was a bridesmaid for.

For a lot of teens it's the final get together before they split up to go to different colleges and 6th forms.

Redcrayons · 21/10/2024 13:49

The School mine went to advised parents not to book until after prom in case the GCSE timetable changed.

if he wasn’t that bothered about going, then you can probably talk him round, but he obviously is.

he’s going to be even worse come the holiday.

AuldSpookySewers · 21/10/2024 14:08

We’ve booked our summer holiday and haven’t even considered a Prom but there’s no chance my DS would want to go to anything like that, so I’m not worried about it.

Do kids really care about these things? I know I would have hated it myself.

Ivehearditbothways · 21/10/2024 14:09

AuldSpookySewers · 21/10/2024 14:08

We’ve booked our summer holiday and haven’t even considered a Prom but there’s no chance my DS would want to go to anything like that, so I’m not worried about it.

Do kids really care about these things? I know I would have hated it myself.

Good for you. Most of them do care, quite a lot.

FrenchandSaunders · 21/10/2024 14:14

You must be able to move the holiday OP. Get him to fly out after the prom and join you. Before you move it make sure you double check exam dates, taster days for 6th form/college, results day, festivals etc. There's so much going on at the end of year 11, you really need to check it all properly before booking anything.

FrenchandSaunders · 21/10/2024 14:15

AuldSpookySewers · 21/10/2024 14:08

We’ve booked our summer holiday and haven’t even considered a Prom but there’s no chance my DS would want to go to anything like that, so I’m not worried about it.

Do kids really care about these things? I know I would have hated it myself.

This boy clearly does, and so do most of the teens I know. A few didn't go, but very very few.

Muchtoomuchtodo · 21/10/2024 14:23

@AuldSpookySewers you can see by reading this thread that year 11 prom means a lot to a significant number of kids.

It’s a shame that you’ve not taken it into any consideration when planning your holiday. I hope for your sake that your dc really is one that isn’t bothered about not going to theirs 🤞🏻

WhiskyTangoFoxtrot · 21/10/2024 14:24

You need to check carefully for other dates when important things might be going on (transition days, book return days, leaver’s day/prize giving, and of course exam contingency day, as well as prom) and book a holiday that does not clash with any of them (ok, book returns can usually be worked around, but it’s a bit of a PITA)

I think you need to find somewhere that your DC can stay whilst you are away. Or move the dates to ones with no clashes, or one parent stays behind at home with DC and flies out after the prom/other Stuff (or leaves the holiday early with DC). Or if DC stays with family/friends, perhaps they could deliver him to airport, see them through check in and he flies solo to destination.

WhiskyTangoFoxtrot · 21/10/2024 14:26

Son is so upset he’s going to miss it. Inconsolable

No good will ever follow from forcing an older teen on to a holiday they are inconsolably upset about

Blondiie · 21/10/2024 14:28

Do kids really care about these things? I know I would have hated it myself

Fairly obviously lots of people care a great deal. Some schools even use it as a carrot for good behaviour. I too am morally superior and would have hated it. Ditto dc1 who didn’t go and I wouldn’t have taken it into consideration if booking a holiday. dc2 was cancelled (covid) and was a bit sad - I think would have been sadder if it had gone ahead for everyone else but missed out as an individual. Dc3 LOVED it. Dc4 is next year in contingency week and is already talking excitedly about it and would 100% be devastated to miss it. If nobody liked it or wanted to go it wouldn’t be put on as an event. The vast majority of people famously like celebrations and parties and going out with their mates and having fun.

Hoppinggreen · 21/10/2024 14:29

AuldSpookySewers · 21/10/2024 14:08

We’ve booked our summer holiday and haven’t even considered a Prom but there’s no chance my DS would want to go to anything like that, so I’m not worried about it.

Do kids really care about these things? I know I would have hated it myself.

yes, a lot of them do. Including OP's son it seems

boredwithfoodprob · 21/10/2024 14:29

Some people are suggesting him staying behind while the family go away - I would have found this almost as sad! - you want to be there to take photos of him and his friends in their suits, possibly drive them there plus a friend of my son's parents had a pre prom for parents and kids. It was a really memorable occasion for everyone I would have hated to miss it as much as he would!

123sunshine · 21/10/2024 14:34

My sons prom date got moved back a week, covid restrictions changing etc, my son missed out on a family holiday with his dad, his choice as prom was important to him, He would have flown out later, but at the time you had to isolate for 5 days i think in the courtry they were vsiting. So it wasn't practical for him to join 4-5 days later. if he wants to attend, you need to move your hldiay or let him miss the holiday.

AuldSpookySewers · 21/10/2024 14:35

Muchtoomuchtodo · 21/10/2024 14:23

@AuldSpookySewers you can see by reading this thread that year 11 prom means a lot to a significant number of kids.

It’s a shame that you’ve not taken it into any consideration when planning your holiday. I hope for your sake that your dc really is one that isn’t bothered about not going to theirs 🤞🏻

Yes, I can guarantee my DS won’t want to go to a school prom.

He dislikes the other kids in his year and hangs out with older teens at lunchtimes. He also chose not to attend any school trips since he was about 11yrs old. I was similar as a child and had zero interest in being friends with the other kids my age, although school Proms were not a thing when I was at school and I left school at 15.

I’m just surprised that so many posters see them as a big deal to be honest as I have no experience of them myself.

Hoppinggreen · 21/10/2024 14:35

boredwithfoodprob · 21/10/2024 14:29

Some people are suggesting him staying behind while the family go away - I would have found this almost as sad! - you want to be there to take photos of him and his friends in their suits, possibly drive them there plus a friend of my son's parents had a pre prom for parents and kids. It was a really memorable occasion for everyone I would have hated to miss it as much as he would!

A friend of mine had split up with her H and had a new partner who she chose to go away with rather than wave her DD off to prom, I felt both of them missed out.
DS and his mates are already discussing cars/suits etc (but not dates, they have all decided to go together)

Blondeshavemorefun · 21/10/2024 14:40

Guessing you have paid for flights and therefore can't move them without losing mo en

You can talk to airline and see if can move them for a cost to following week

We didn't have proms in my day but know schools do now and yes it's a big thing so he can't miss

Who is going on holiday. When is prom in it

Can he go and fly back earlier or fly after prom

Original poster

RochfordRuby · 21/10/2024 14:40

Can’t move the holiday - there are 12 people going for a 50th wedding anniversary celebration. Whatever we do, someone ends up upset!

OP posts:

boredwithfoodprob · 21/10/2024 14:41

Where does Prom fall in terms of the holiday?

Fairyflaps · 21/10/2024 14:42

We did this too as we were so excited about being able to book a holiday outside of school holidays for the first time in years and therefore half the price. The prom didn't occur to us as it wasn't a thing when we were at school, and DS only realised later. Luckily it was in the UK so DS came home from the holiday early, and went to the prom with his friends.
BTW it wasn't in the GCSE contingency period for us.