When is it OK for a teenager to be home alone for a week?

[RosePouchong]

Hi

I'm not sure how I feel about this.

DD and her best friend are both 15. DD is turning 16 in a couple of weeks, her friend is turning 16 in a couple of months (not sure when - she's in the year below DD at school but I think she has an autumn birthday).

DD has told me that her friend is being left home alone for a week as her parents had a trip planned abroad, but the girl has mocks so needs to stay home. DD has asked me if she can stay with her friend that week.

Unfortunately, inviting her friend to stay with us is not an option right now as there is work being done on our house at the moment and everything is a bit chaotic, so the friend wouldn't be interested in staying here in the first place.

I know I have a tendency to be over protective, so wondered if I could have some thoughts on this? I wouldn't personally go abroad and leave DD alone for a week and am surprised this girl's parents are doing this, though I gather it is not against the law. I suppose I'd feel happier about this girl being left alone if my DD is staying with her.

I live 20 minutes walk away from the girl's house (I don't drive) if anything were to kick off.

Really don't know what to think/do about this.

Not a chance!

Party 🎉

My parents left me for 2 weeks when I was 15/16, I was pretty sensible, I didn’t have a party but did have my boyfriend over.

I stayed with a friend for a week at 16/17 while her parents were away and it was all fine. We were both very sensible and responsible! I think for me the decision would depend more on personality than age.

She’s 15! How will she manage if something actually happens. Hopefully it won’t

Whilst my 16 seems mature enough day to day I judge their capabilities of sorting out a situation where something didn't go to plan.

For example for a long time (years) they wanted to go into London to ride around the tube network. They're more than capable of that but had there been a reason to shut some stations due to say a possible terrorist attack, could they then work out how to get out of London by other means to a location I could collect them from. Now they are beginning to get that maturity. So as I said it all depends if at almost 16 you think the child can cope with a situation outside the box

You don't know whether her parents have arranged for family or friends to pop in to spend some time with her and/or check up on her.

16

Completely normal in my family to be alone at that age. If the kids are responsible and not party kids then they just go about their lives.

At 15 I would report to social services

Lol.

My friend used to be routinely left for a weekend at 15 due to her parents' sporting commitments. We always had parties but we also always made sure we cleaned up nicely afterwards.

For a week, a sensible 15 year old should be ok especially close to her 16th birthday.

I was left alone for a fortnight at 17 with a 15 year old, a 6 year old and a 5 month old.
Granted the 5 month old was mine.
We all survived.
She'll be 16 soon enough. Leaving her for a week will be fine I'm sure her parents have weighed up the situation and decided she's sensible enough to be left.

I don't know whether the parents have arranged for anyone to check on her - but from experience of other things, I know if I ask the girl's mum I'll get a load of defensiveness from her, however diplomatic I try to be in asking.

I'm 20 minutes walk away and can walk up (or if any Ubers are available if things kick off, then I'd get there quicker) if there's a problem.

I really don't know how DD would deal with an out of the box situation. I think she might panic though would hopefully ring me.

Nope. I'd be hesitant to leave a 17/18 yr old alone for that long. But it would depend on the kid and my neighborhood.

15, no I wouldn’t. 16 going on 17 I would. But really it depends on the kid. At 15/ 16 I would have been planning a week long party with a revolving cast of unsavoury characters but some kids would be real MN teenagers and probably spend the week we no cooking wholesome food and doing homework. So I would say honestly assess your kid ( and the other girl) before you decide.

I wouldn't. My DD is 15 (16 later this summer) and very sensible but I wouldn't want to leave her overnight.

If my DD didn't stay the week, I'd still be worried about her friend

My DD is 15 and I consider that too young. However I went abroad myself at 17 so I guess nearer 17 is probably the age I’d consider it.

I lived alone at 16 😬

Oo I'm really laid back and leave my 15 and 16.5 yr old to go out raving and come home at 7am, but I wouldn't be happy to leave them for a week yet. I think in another year I'd leave them for a weekend away but not abroad and not for more than two nights. But, I lived on my own at 16 and had a baby at 17 so I am being a bit of a hypocrite!

I left my then 16 yo son for a week. Bought him food for a week, left him emergency money. He was fine. He wasn't the type to have parties, so all he did was play video games and eat. And feed the cat.

Depends on the child. My youngest is 15, and I can't imagine leaving him home for a week! He's only just 15 though, a lot can change in a year.

If ask her ‘tell me what can go wrong and what you would do’
if the answer is nothing they might not be ready yet. If it’s a good, honest list then I think it’s fine.

Some of these responses! I worry about this generation if they can't even cope for a week alone at home at that age.

Why are parents not preparing their children for life, independence 🤦🏼‍♀️

lazypuppy I completely agree!
I was living alone at 16!