Having sex when teenagers are in the house

[tiredandgrumpy]

Embarrassing problem. Having a dilemma. Turns out our floorboards are very squeaky and since our bedroom is immediately above dd's bedroom, she's getting disturbed.

We're honestly not noisy. Last night I didn't think there was any noise, but dd is in tears because she claims we disturbed her again.

What is the answer? We can try to get better soundproofing in the floor, but is half her upset the knowledge that her parents are up to something she just doesn't want to know about? Dh has a high sex drive so reducing frequency is not really a long term option.

Just tell her it's what you're in a healthy relationship ? Maybe wear ear protection?

Quite frankly listening to anyone having sex is gross, even more so when you are a teenager and it’s your parents.

Can’t you wait until she is out? Or have a quickie in the shower?

Ypu should immediately stop having sex until she has left home, or is 30, whichever comes last (snarf).

Or give her £10 for the pictures, like they used to In the olden days.

You absolutely have to stop having sex when there's a possibility of her hearing. The fact she's in tears about it means she's finding it really disturbing.

Coming from a household where this was common it's put me off sex for life. Can't you just have sex when she's out?

It's really not fair on her to subject her to the noise of you having sex. The fact she's clearly already raised this and has had to raise it again is mortifying. I think that although it's totally normal to have sex you do owe it to your children to be discrete about it. How bothered about this is your dh?

How old is your dd?

Just tell her it's what you're in a healthy relationship

😷 don’t do that!

You’re going to have to find a way to ensure she doesn’t hear you. Could she potentially move rooms?

Swap rooms so you are on the ground floor.

Usually I'd go with, be quieter, try a different location etc.

But if she's in tears because of it, you really need to think about this.

Poor kid

It's not great hearing your parents at it when you're a teenager in the next room (or room below in your case).

Is the bed squeaky or just the floorboards? I used to have a wooden bed frame which was noisy so would just get on the floor to do anything vigorous.

I think I’d be in tears if I had to listen to my parents having sex on a regular basis.

I’m sorry but nobody wants to hear that, especially not teenagers.

Could you switch rooms so that you have the ground floor and then the sound won't travel? Obviously you'd have to invent some other reason than the truth for the switch.

How old is she? Do you have to do it when she is specifically in her bedroom rather than watching TV downstairs? You say DH has a high sex drive but do you?

Move the bed? Is the floor carpeted?

Take the carpet up and fix the floorboards

Sort any squeakiness of the bed

Job done

I used to hear my parents having sex when I was a teenager and it made me develop anxiety and have trouble sleeping in case I heard it or it woke me up. I still get anxious now when I go home for a few days in case I hear it. Is your husbands high sex drive more important than your daughters emotional wellbeing?

Dh has a high sex drive so reducing frequency is not really a long term option.

This is really disturbing

Do it on the sofa?

We wait until the kids are at school these days, or out 😉

I have two teens 16 & 17 we tend to have sex in the morning when there is zero chance they'd be awake! Either that or when they're not in. I'd rather not have sex than know they can hear us!!

God we have avoided this for years! He used to go to a club every Friday so sex became known as 'the Friday night thing ' Then uni so all good but now back home for lockdown aged 25 so everything put on hold again!

I agree that maybe take the carpet up and fix the squeaky bed. Beyond that you should carry on as normal. Your dd will in the long term feel blessed that her parents have a loving relationship. I walked in on my parents ‘going it’ when I was 13. I was mortified... I went back to bed and hid under the duvet 😂 ... then after that I knew what the noises were about. It is part of a healthy adult relationship and I was not harmed knowing that it was going on. They Never mentioned it to me though... now that would have been gross!

Thank you all. We tried the floor last night and I honestly thought there was no noise, but clearly she was bothered. She's in tears today because she didn't sleep well.

Switching rooms isn't an option.

I will put her above dh. He's going to have to do without a lot more, because she's always in, but early mornings may be a possibility once we've sorted out the floorboards.

Unless you are deaf, in which case I apologise, then I am unsure how you possibly thought there was no noise but your DD could hear you having sex

The logical solution is to shag when she is out like the majority of us already do.

Sorry I cross posted as I got distracted by DD coming home from work!

She is always in? How old is she? Why does she never go anywhere?

Unless you're shagging for hours on end I think she should get over it.