Does anyone ever feel like they are in an abusive relationship with their dcs!!

[Slippersmum]

Ok, prepare for a torrent of self pity!! Another weekend of not being able to do anything right, no matter what I do! Don't know which is worst the horrible comments or the silent treatment. Am I the only one who feels like they are in some kind of abusive relationship!!?? If I wasn't related to them I would do all I could to avoid them, let alone live with them!!

AmIBeingTreasonable - Well, I've done it too! I have installed the Screentime app on both their phones and their pads, as they hide them from me. I can now block the use of both and limit whatever I want from my pad or phone, and I have set strict limits, a bedtime and lights out, and I can shut anything down and the touch of a few buttons . They have both thrown a complete meltdown! I have also taken away Box hard drives until they show me a change in attitude and also get on with set chores.. I haven't told dh where I've hidden things so he can't give in for an easy life either. I will reward good behaviour with screen time, bad behaviour with removing time. If chores get done they get time on xbox.

Not sure they would come now without a 'riot'....i may pop down to the local station tmrw and have a chat...maybe a shock and a good rollocking from someone in authority may make him think twice!! We'll try anything!

Yay! bubby64, well done
Also if they moan and don't do things the first time you can add sanctions like less time online etc but in fairness warn them that this will happen before you do it and perhaps remind ONCE only at the first moan, the first time, good luck!

Just wanted to say what a relief it was to read this thread...I have lurked on various threads for months and have finally succumbed!

I am finding my relationship with 14 year old DD is just me on the path of least resistance....I cannot stand the looks, comments, and ignoring and straight up to bedroom when she returns home......so then I try and be non confrontational and let her tell me things. This does work at times but I have had to bite my lip...I was never like this to my parents, they too find it as baffling as me!

I am a kind, accommodating mum... I have picked her up from a friends, fed and then dropped her tonight at a sleepover as they have finished school....and she was cheerfulness personified and I was loveliest mum...is it really this transparent a cupboard love??!! I just despair of getting through these years....do you ?

Hi TooMany....that sounds like a normal day in our house..grunts..ignorance..lack of respect...no manners...permanently in his room...and like you i was never bought up like that...nor was he! Yes i despair...i literally dread going to bed knowing ive got the same old crap the next day to look forward to. I also had cupboard love today...lovely day out...buffer city..got home...back to the grunts..agression...mood faces...i cant bear it!

There seems to be quite a few people making a stand at the moment! Loved the post about sitting ds and dp down together. I feel like that too, as my dhs behavior can be, well, not very adult like. At the moment we are going through a phase when he is ignoring our dd. Just after she has finished her period of time when she was ignoring him!! AArrrgggg!!!!!

Yep...i do wonder if im looking after 2 children sometimes!!! They just dont speak now which puts even more pressure on me to make sure im spending equal time with them!! I should just let them sort it out really!

I know totally how you feel Templar!! Sometimes I think it would be easier on my own!!