16 year old daughter experimenting with sex

[trace2274]

Im a single mum and my 16 yr old daughter and I have always been good friends until recently. She has met a 18 yr old boy from the same school, and doesnt seem to want to confide in me anymore. I used to trust my daughter completey, but have recently lost faith in her as I discovered recent internet searchs in anal sex and sexual parasites. She is in the middle of her GCSE's at the minute and dont want to cause her stress, but I feel that I cant allow her to behave in this manner, but I am at a loss as in how to speak to her and raise the subject. Any help and advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

Maryz, I posted this thread for a reason, and that was to ask for help in how to deal with a situation that I was unclear on how to deal with, due to the fact that I have one child, and came up against a situation that I was unfamiliar with.I understand that there are some trolls on this site, but I also understand the rules of the site. As for your opinion on how it makes you feel unclean, you still havnt explained. I have had many replies to my post. Some negative, some positive,I have also been accused of trolling ( which I had to google lol) some with helpful advice and some without. I truely appreciate all advice, im not a supermum. I feel unsure at times, as to wether or not im doing the right thing with my girl. But I really dont appreciate replies that are offensive or accusatory, especially unfounded. I appreciate everyone's opinion, but I will get offensive at times.

I apologize, I didnt mean ''offensive'' I meant 'defensive'. Im losing myself here lol. Anyways thankyou to each and everyone of you for your advice, even if I didnt agree with some of them. On the plus side. I have had the chance to have a good chat with my girl im the last hour, we cried, we laughed, and we hugged and reassured each other. It turns out, as some posters suggested, that my daughter heard about the subject mentioned, in school, googled it, and just forgot to delete the history, she hasnt been experimenting and re - assured me that she has been responsible. In return, I have offered to take my daughter and her bf out for a meal, reasons are to talk to them both together and establish ground rules, and to let them both know, that they can come to me for help and and advice if needed. Thankyou all for your comments, good and bad. (some better than most lol) and for your advice :-)

Glad you are back on track with your girl

So glad to hear things are patched up and sorted!

Maryz - being accepting of a harmless idea is not an extreme. I get what you mean about being uncomfortable - if the thread was by a troll, which is now obvious it isn't.

FantasticButtocks - adore your name :')

Nice, happy conclusion to the thread!

FantasticButtocks and avianaz, im glad as well, and Thankyou both! It now seems that posting my thoughts, wasnt such a bad idea after all. Again, thank-you! :-D

That's great that you had a good chat with your dd , taking them both out for a meal is a great idea.

Yes of course she hasn't been experimenting. She only googled it to find out what it is. That's definitely what your 16 year old who knows her mum thinks anal sex is unnatural and immoral was doing. Because of course she would have told you exactly what she has been up to with her boyfriend as you are so understanding and tolerant of sex.

Thankyou SoonToBeSix, you were a brilliant help and I really, really appreciate your comments, im truely glad you replied to the thread :-) @-}--

Don't think I really gave any advice just wanted you to feel supported . Feel free to inbox me any time .

Pourquoi your post was uncalled for why try and put doubt in the op's head. Please ignore trace.

So if anal is inappropriate for a 16 year old is there an age limit on certain sex positions? Missionary only until you're 30?

You didn't accuse of trolling Maryz, but your 'unclean' comment did come across as a suggestion, which is why I asked.

When my mother snooped on me (I believe you when you say you didn't, btw, but my mum definitely did), she discovered just what I had been up to. I was 17. I managed to laugh it all off as a big misunderstanding and she was desperate to believe me, so she did. I think it's unlikely she will be completely honest with you, unless she's very different to pretty much every teenage girl in the world. Of course, I am indeed immoral and unnatural so feel free to disregard this.

OK, Maryz, as you say, your daughter is almost 18yr old, my daughter has just barely turned 16. This is her first, and I stress FIRST boyfriend or even experience of boyfriends. So I reckon taking tgem both out for a meal to set boundaries wasnt so bad, especially when my daughter herself actually thought it was a good idea.

SoonToBeSix, you were actually alot more help than you think, I truely thankyou for your support @-}-- I will inbox you with further news, and also you can feel absolutely free to inbox me anytime :-D

Thanks for the explanation Maryz, I got hold of the wrong end of the stick then . It just gets so tiresome around here (not on this thread in this case as I now understand) when people are inferring 'troll' so readily sometimes. Anyway, kind of you to explain.

And OP, I am glad to read you have been able to talk with your daughter now and that you're satisfied that it was just normal curiosity .

Trace...
I'm a single parent too and if I saw searches about anal sex on the computer.....(i have 2 x teenage sons)...I would not like it....its a shared computer...I am no prude either! I share your concern ...its a first bf and when things start going wrong at Sch...skipping lessons etc when normally all has been well ...then understandable that you would be worried....I would have a word in a 'roundabout' sort of way...Yes she is 16y...legal for sex....but lives under your roof...your rules....flipping hard I know.....!

whoops...didnt read all post....glad you have concluded! happy days!:)

Trace fwiw, you absolutely did the right by talking to her. She does sound like a sensible girl and shows her maturity by wanting to go out for dinner with you and bf.

Well done on be calm and not jumping to conclusions when talking to her.

She is 16 and you have no control over it, no matter how much you would like to have. My mother knew I was having sex at 14, and she tried so many times to ban buys from coming in and all sorts, and I still did it. thats only 5 years ago now, and i've been experimenting with it ever since. It's NORMAL to experiment with sex and finding your sexuality.

So CrayolaRockanRolla, you are now 19? Am I right? laughs
Are you a mother of teenage daughter? If not kindly keep your opinion to your yourself, and fyi I feel sorry for your mum!