Why doesn’t she want me as a client?

[notamumyet2010]

This is such a first world problem, I’m almost embarrassed to speak about it but it’s really playing on my mind so I would love some opinions.
For years, I’ve been seeing a beautician for nail art. She was amazing, really talented and I thought we got on really well. I knew she also worked from home and after a couple of years I asked if she was looking for some home clients and she said no not at the moment due to time/space. Fair enough. I thought.
Anyway start of this year, she lost her job, it was very sudden as the place went under. She messaged me telling me what happened and I expressed empathy. After a week or so I saw on social media she was telling people to message her if they want to book in with her at home. Straight away I sent her a message and she responded saying she was just waiting for some materials to arrive and she would message me to let me know once she was up and running. I saw again on her socials she was seeing clients. I waited for a message and nothing. I was super confused as I really thought we got on well and I was a regular client. I left it for a while thinking she was probably getting things sorted, and it takes a while I’m sure. Well it’s been months now and I thought hell I’m going to send her one more message. So I texted asking how she is and is she taking more clients on. She said yes and she’s working hard including at a local spa. No mention of me booking in with her. I was like ok this is odd, decided to be brave and ask outright. “Can I book with you?, only I never heard from you” I get a strange message back saying she would be willing to do my nails but is fully booked till September!
I feel like for some reason she certainly doesn’t want me as a client, I have racked my brains for a reason and the only one I can think of is I ask for nail art every time which takes more time. However she did always say she loves it as she gets to be creative and all her other clients are boring. In fact she called me her favourite client.
Obviously sadly you guys will be no wiser as to why this has happened or what I’ve done, but my question is…..would you book in for September or just accept that for whatever reason this client/beautician relationship has ended?
It’s such a shame as she really is sooo talented but I just feel this has probably tainted the relationship now anyway.
Thanks for reading if you got this far!

I’d just go elsewhere, couldn’t be bothered with the hassle of chasing someone like this to get my nails done, she’s obviously busy and can pick and choose, so can you.

My nail place literally has a tip jar 😅. But believe that if it makes you feel better about not tipping lol

I’d just find someone else

What do you class as a ‘nice present’?

but is fully booked till September!
I feel like for some reason she doesn’t want you as client?

summer…. Notoriously busiest time of year for beauticians. Odd to jump to this conclusion

It’ll be the money. I work as a gardener one day a week helping out a friend. Some of her clients are really nice but they’ve been with her a while and are on older pricing structure, and their gardens are particularly hard work. I end up doing a lot of these ones as she prioritises the people who pay the most for the easiest jobs. I’m doing this as a side hustle, I earn a lot from my main job, so I don’t mind picking up the friendly old ladies who pay less.

You probably need to have a frank discussion with her about pricing appropriately for the complex and long winded art you want. Have you shopped around to see if you’re massively underpaying?

I agree, but now she's set up again she might feel awkward charging you the extra for taking ages to decide and the extra time with no tip at the end of it to show your gratitude. Far easier to take on new clients that are easier and quicker. BUT while you believe you have given her beautiful gifts, that doesn't mean she thought so too, she might have preferred the cash each time.

You dont tip? You should always tip. She gave you extra time and attention. Giving gifts is not what she wants. She wants income! It’s her job.
if she had other clients that consistently give her a few extra pounds each time she would favour them over you. She may have felt unappreciated. Despite getting gifts. (That she may not have wanted).
hopefully see her in September and give a generous tip.

Put her on the spot and ask her why?

100% !

Her response

“I am booked up until September but feel free to book an appointment from September onwards”

and she’d think “wtf”

It sounds like your nails are complicated and time-consuming. Was she paid per job or a set daily wage in the salon? For a set wage, it wouldn't matter to her how long your nails took, but at home it may not be worth her while. Not tipping won't have helped.

You are looking far too much into this.

She lost her job and was setting up a new business. She would have been stressed and busy. Yes she said she would contact you but she has loads of clients to think about, you have one nail technician. It probably slipped her mind. You should have contacted her sooner.

If she has a good client base you are lucky to get in in September. My nail tech lady is booked up with her regular clients months and months in advance. I always book 5 months in advance to make sure I get in with her.

Just book for September and go along. If she didn't want you as a client she could have just told you her client books were full.

I’ve just been having my nails done. I asked my regular technician what would be her reasons to avoid a client.
She offered these ideas:-
A. She isn’t making enough money from your appointments, for whatever reason- maybe your nails need more work, you chat too much and delay her for example.
B.You often cancel or are late.
C. You don’t tip.
D. You won’t pay cash
In any case she recommends you find a different technician, her words “ And don’t embarrass yourself!”.
I hope you find someone good.

Take the sept appointment and see what happens. I'm guessing there's such a long wait as it's holiday season so people want their nails doing. My nail salon is pretty much fully booked atm too.
I also think you're over thinking it, OP.

what did you pay for your nails @notamumyet2010

I wonder if you are sending unclear messages. Instead of simply contact her and requestiing a booking, it's almost as if you are waiting for her to say, 'Oh you! I can't wait to do your nails again!' before you think you have the right to book in with her.

Just keep it simple and professional. Say, 'Great. September works,' and suggest a few times.

If she still doesn't get back to you, it may be that she finds you hard work for some reason. Do you overshare life woes? Or encourage her to open up in a way that she doesn't find professional by asking about her family/health/love life? Do you tip? Keep changing your mind about what you want?

But that does sound like you are blurring the boundaries between professional relationship and friendship. People need money. CoL. One person's idea of a nice present is another person's idea of landfill.

This sounds like a great idea. Thanks

£100 in a card and the drink she drinks and chocolates she has mentioned loving.

Birthday and Christmas. As mentioned above money in a card, drink and chocs. But yes you may be right and it may all be about the tipping.

Maybe but judging on other messages that have been sent yes I almost did think she would reach out and say let’s get you booked in. I’m one of her most regular clients, others often go for special events whereas I am every 2-3 weeks regularly.
I don’t feel I over share, if anything I know far more about her relationship issues, family problems and work stress than she does about me. i normally chat about tv, movies or books I’ve read.
Never change my mind and always say how great they are, cos they really are! I’ve had loads of beauticians over the years and she really does the best job, hence why I care.

Ex nail tech here. Firstly I would never expect a tip - it was my own business so I would charge a price for the nail treatment and that was it. Secondly, there were the odd clients who I found particularly difficult to deal with for various reasons, so when they wanted to book in again my book was always full for a few months. They soon gave up.

No, she messaged me saying she had lost her job and we exchanged a few messages then. She then put a post of socials a few days later saying she was going to work from home and message if you want to book. I sent a message. 3 weeks later I messaged her and she said she was waiting on some materials to arrive and she would message me when she was ready to take bookings. I never heard from her since. I know this is common but I really don’t think I did it wrong, I did what she asked. The only thing maybe is I should have messaged again a couple of weeks later but I assumed maybe setting up had taken longer than she expected. It can’t be easy to set a business up from home.