Lesbian mother of the bride outfit.

[Brunosmumsy]

Hey all.
I came out 5 years ago and since then have been slowly finding a style that I feel is authentically me. Historically I was the boss's wife, wearing clothes that were expected of me, that I never felt comfortable in.
My dd is getting married next year, the grooms mum has already started posting huge hats, big dresses, in our wedding planning group. My dd has said you'll wear a fascinator though ( to me ) but eek. It's just not me.
My style is more Cate Blanchet, stylish suits, soft shirts, heels.
I have no idea where to look to find what I have in my mind.
Wedding is monochrome but guests can wear any colour.
I've never been a mother of the bride before. Help.

My god, after looking at that exceptional Veronica Beard link I’ve decided that when I grow up I want to be a lesbian mother of the bride.

Some sensational suggestions here OP, please do update when you’ve got your outfit!

I went to wedding last February. Fabulous jumpsuit,; contrasting jacket. No hat it just flattens my curly hair and fascoators look daft! Would that work for you?

I went to a wedding recently where the Bride's mum wore something similar to this (but nicer) a grey chiffon, floaty, trouser suit with long jacket. She looked amazing (in contrast to the Step mum who looked positively dowdy in comparison, which might have added extra sparkle to the Mum's day!)

https://cicinia.co.uk/products/floral-chiffon-mother-of-the-bride-dress-pant-suits?variant=45615823978735

@weaselwords i ordered several styles from Shibumi but unfortunately they didn’t fit my body shape as I’m 5’2 and short waisted! I was all set to go visit them to get made to measure when DD decided black tie was the order of the day! I ended up with 2 fabulous Adrianna Papell dresses. That said the Shibumi jackets were beautiful. Friend had a long coat made for her daughters wedding and looked fantastic.

I'd say a velvet trouser suit too.

@sweetpickle2 OMG I'm in love with that suit!

Thank you! I’m 5’10” and the waist of things is never in the right place so will make sure they have my measurements.

My link vanished!

www.laredoute.co.uk/ppdp/prod-350354228.aspx

Saw this suit on Instagram and thought of you @Brunosmumsy.

Never give up

I thought it put context into your dilemma.
I have zero style so no tips but hope you enjoy the wedding, wear comfy shoes.

Yes, I did, to my Daughter’s wedding in July as I didn’t want to wear a horrible hat. Lots of people wore them.

What is wrong with them?😐

I went to the wedding of a lesbian couple in their 50s, they each wore a tuxedo-style suit with black trousers and a brocade jacket with shawl collar (each had a different colour). That would work for you I think, maybe with patent brogues and even a cool brooch? I'll try to find a find a picture. No fascinator lol.

Couldn't find many pictures but this is the idea...

Reiss also have a teal velvet suit in at the moment. Might be worth a look

https://www.reiss.com/style/su389058/e84214#e84214

When my dd got married I went to John Lewis in Cambridge for a personal shopper. Best thing I could have done. Brought me stuff to try that I would never have looked at, but were fabulous on. Got the most gorgeous dress and jacket and felt a million dollars. Also no to the fascinator but you could try a chunky headband to see if it looks good.

Just wanted to say OP, how great to be living your best life and to have a chance to celebrate your daughter's wedding whilst wearing what makes you feel good.

On suits: Bindle & Keep are a NY-based tailors that specialise in suits for women. Possibly too far and expensive to visit, but there might be some inspiration from their instagram account? Lots of gorgeous women looking wonderful in tailoring: https://www.instagram.com/bindleandkeep

Also you could look at https://www.sumissura.com/en/ for semi bespoke tailoring. For a special occasion like a wedding, having a really good fit will really make a difference.
This is a great thread of ideas for anyone who doesn't want the traditional MOB look regardless of orientation, thanks!

OP some women wear smart felt fedoras, the Spencer aunts in one of Harry and Meghans wedding photos or Sophie Duchess of Edinburgh wears them. They can look chique, very smart and not too femmy..

I think the biggest thing about mother of the bride is that it's a showstopper and you feel great. I don't think it's about suits and hats unless that's your vibe. I love all the suggestions so far. I adored my mom's MOB outfit. She worried it was too much to she was stealing my thunder but she looked and felt amazing and that was the most important bit. I'm sure she doesn't care what you wear it's more around the aura. Showstopper can be wild, sleek, simple, demure, edgy. As long is it makes the person wearing it shine.

A slate grey tuxedo would be brilliant with a trilby but might well be too 'out there' in a way and over shadow the bride. Nice idea though.

£500 for a polyester suit??????

The OP is perfectly entitled to mention her sexuality if she feels that it’s relevant to how she dresses now or at all. It’s part of who she is.

My mother-in-law wore a lovely maroon velvet trouser suit to my wedding well over 10 years and although my mum wore a dress neither her or MIL wore a hat of any description.
Dont discount a jumpsuit - one of my friends from swimming who is not far from 80 wore a jumpsuit for her son’s wedding and looked absolutely fabulous. It wasn’t something she had considered wearing but it was brought out for her try during an appointment with a personal shopper at John Lewi.She didn’t wear a hat either!

And that’s just the trousers!