Nobody likes my greying hair!

[Sidebeforeself]

Decided to embrace my natural grey ( for many reasons!) Im entering that really tricky stage where I have a big stripe so feeling self conscious but know I have to grin and bear it. But what’s not helping is how many negative comments Im getting from friends and family. Things like Im too young to do it (54) , it’s not professional for work etc. I know DH not keen .

I realise other opinions don’t matter but when I m feeling self conscious it would be nice to get a bit of support. Did anyone else experience this?

I do think grey/white hair is not flattering on most women and It makes the skin looks really dull.

I also don't think that colouring your hair means you are not accepting the fact that you are ageing or that you are in thrall to the patriarchy...it is just a personal choice.

I also think there is a lot of wishful thinking when arguing that other people won't see you as automatically as past it at work it if you have grey hair. It is just the reality.

Yet to see anyone in real life who looks better with grey hair. Always messy, unkempt, old and tired. Even celebs don't look good, like Andie Mcdowell, a beautiful woman, but looks like a witch with that her horrible hair. She'd be stunning if she'd go back to her brown colour.

I firmly believe women should do whatever they want to with their own hair.

However, I think some people are kidding themselves (or believing polite comments) if they think they look younger with it.

No-one looks younger with grey hair and that's absolutely fine.

You sound horrible.

I got highlights at the hairdressers to begin with which made it much easier to start with. Then lockdown happened. After lockdown the hairdressers put a couple of toners on at appointments and I did the purple shampoo at home now I just use normal shampoo.

Mixed responses to begin with and sometimes I’m not sure. I am 58. Some people don’t recognise me now, which is quite nice sometimes and i also get lots of compliments about my hair colour.

I agree

@ChilliPB

Shes giving her opinion, is she not entitled to do that!
You sound like the horrible one

I love the colour my hairdresser uses on my hair but when I overrun my appointments I love the way the roots have more variation and reflect the light. Seriously tempted to go completely grey. What do people find about the condition? Better with or without colour?

It often looks a bit rubbish at the grow out phase. Once the grey is past your chin it looks miles better

I agree re Andie McDowell. it’s not a good look imo.

I have loads of curly hair, just like her, and a fair amount of grey. My fear is of looking ‘witchy’. I’ve gone lighter, from my natural very dark brown but I can’t imagine going totally grey anytime before 70ish.

@Mohur you have said almost word for word what I have said in the past. You are exactly right. Going warm with colour is not right for our skin. Going black with colour looks harsh and ridiculous. The lovely variations of dark and white look amazing in my opinion

Try a keratin treatment. Smooths it for months.

I had to Google her. I can see now that this lady is a perfect example of looking 'washed out' with grey hair - even wearing so much heavy make up.

I wish I looked as ‘washed out’ as her.

Yet to see anyone in real life who looks better with grey hair. Always messy, unkempt, old and tired

Grey hair stops being wiry and softens.

Im not letting mine grow just yet - but I am considering it.

Yeah, I have cool colouring and originally dark hair and the way it's naturally greying is so much better with my skin tone than anything out of a bottle. It's a steely salt and pepper with the odd silver streak and with the help of a purple shampoo has a lovely sheen to it.

It originally had hairs with everything from ginger and mid brown to black in it and dying it just took out all that variation that gave it depth. The hairs now are a mixture of dark brown and white and it looks dark in some lights and lighter in others but never washes me out.

She’s made a sweeping and highly negative statement, about grey hair on women. It’s a horrible thing to say. Imagine if you generalised another physical feature - like weight - and said you’d never seen that feature look good.

An opinion might be - it can be difficult to suit certain skin tones, or grey hair might be more difficult to manage as the texture can be different. Not saying that grey hair on women (specifically women, because that’s what we’re talking about here isn’t it?) is always messy, unkempt, old and tired.

Why on earth would you want to look like that? Hair aside, the heavy eye make up alone is so terribly ageing.

I'm 35 with a white streak in my hair and I love it. People have said I should dye my hair and I ignore them. Meanwhile if I can do something about my dreadful skin (started getting acne, think a bit of rosacea, and weird dry flaky patches around my mouth) then I'd be happy.

She's stunning with her grey hair.

SapphireSeptember try coldsore cream

Natural, healthy well styled natural coloured hair is far better looking (and less aging) than an older women with boxed dyed grey hair.

This. Do what you want but …

It’s hard out here. Especially professionally. No way would I want to have grey hair until I was at Board level or otherwise very senior. I need to look competitive and dynamic (translation: younger than I am).

It isn’t fair but I am fighting enough fights.

No reason not to. I use the Schwarzkopf live one.

i’m growing mine out too and i’ve noticed if i wear a hat i can’t see the different part, large headbands also would achieve the same effect 😁 keep at it and as others have said look at silver sisters content on instagram for inspo.

i saw a study somewhere where they showed people pictures of the same people with white / gray hair and dyed hair and they guessed their age accurately either way so that keeps me motivated

i just don’t think it’s right that women feel pressured to pour toxic chemicals that cause cancer on their heads every few weeks to meet an arbitrary beauty standard and line the pockets of hair dye companies, it is also bad for the environment and our fellow inhabitants of this planet, human and non human, buying and washing those nasty chemicals down the drain!