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Losing weight is the ONLY way to look good :(

192 replies

Mrcpy · 18/03/2023 17:01

I’d describe myself as fairly style-conscious, I’m into skincare and beauty, health and well-being, and I know how to put together a polished outfit.

Sadly I’m coming to the realisation that I never feel as good - no matter how much effort I’ve put into the above - I NEVER feel as good as I feel when I’ve lost weight.

When I’ve lost weight, it doesn’t matter what I wear. I could be completely casual but still feel like I look amazing. When I’ve gained weight, it doesn’t matter what I wear. I could be in the best clothes / designer bag / jewellery but still feel scruffy.

I had a severe eating disorder in my teens and twenties, and I feel sad that it’s still with me in some way. For context, I’m late 30’s, and BMI fluctuates between 23-26 so nothing dramatic. Have a good job, family etc so I know there’s more to life.

Just feel sad really.

OP posts:
BuffyTheCat · 18/03/2023 17:18

I think it depends how my clothes fit. I lost some weight a few years ago and all my clothes were a bit too big. It didn’t look great. I bought some new clothes, then eventually gained a bit of weight, so the new stuff was a bit too small - also not a great look. But my original bigger clothes looked good again.

My weight doesn’t fluctuate much (also between a BMI of 23-26), but when it does it seems to cross a size boundary. If you’re the same, that’s probably part of the problem.

mackthepony · 18/03/2023 17:19

Yup, you're absolutely right, op

If you're thin then you look better in everything.

BestestBrownies · 18/03/2023 17:19

Same. I'm currently feeling heavy and wearing all the 'comfortable' clothes (loose, shapeless), as want to be invisible. Luckily it's still cold enough for the big coat.

I've got some beautiful clothes, but they're all tiny. I look and feel amazing when i'm able to wear them though.

From a fellow 'recovered' anorexic

Janedoe82 · 18/03/2023 17:22

I am not anorexic, but yes- I did feel happiest with my body when I was really skinny. Sadly I was skinny because I was experiencing grief.

determinedtomakethiswork · 18/03/2023 17:26

I think you're absolutely right. It's a very sad fact! Clothes looks so much better on a slimmer body. What I find interesting is that when I diet, particularly a low-carb diet, I feel absolutely fantastic after a few days and yet I can't seem to keep it up. I just don't understand that.

Summer2424 · 18/03/2023 17:31

Hi @Mrcpy i totally get you. Pre pregnancy i'd wear jeans and a t-shirt and look so good (i was very toned). Now i'm not toned up, i cannot seem to rock the jeans and t-shirt look. For me i think i need to keep up with my exercise then my clothes fit well 💃

StaceyMeloni · 18/03/2023 17:31

Totally agree. I spend hardly any money on clothes when slim. It’s so easy to look good in just jeans and t shirt!

hamstersarse · 18/03/2023 17:33

You are not wrong.

nameischangedagain · 18/03/2023 17:38

You are completely right OP. I feel the exact same. In fact I've had a minor meltdown about it today when clothes shopping.

I also battled eating disorders (anorexia & bulimia) in younger years.

I am now 32, "recovered" but the sad truth is I just don't look good bigger. I miss the tiny version of me even though I know it's not sustainable.

All the clothes I tried today looked awful. Im wobbly and big.

I eat well and exercise too but clearly it's not enough to look how I want to look.

A horrible reality.

IndianSummer78 · 18/03/2023 17:42

I agree. Clothes are designed to look good on slim people. I've put on a few pounds and it's given me a small pot belly, nothing hangs 💯 right any more. Most clothes aren't designed for this shape and those that are aren't particularly fashionable.

Lovelyring · 18/03/2023 17:51

I'm sad to read this as I strongly disagree. I think everyone has a healthy weight for their body. I have been unhealthily skinny before. I think I looked much much better when I was two stones heavier (I wasn't overweight, I was a healthy weight instead of being ill). I felt sexy because I had some curves and boobs!

I think it's harder to look good if you are an unhealthy weight for your body, whether that's too thin or too fat.

Prinnny · 18/03/2023 17:53

Yep in the words of Kate..nothing tastes as good as skinny feels..but wine would disagree 😂

MintJulia · 18/03/2023 17:54

I think there are a lot of things you can do to look better.

Jersey and clingy clothes generally don't look great on someone who is a bit overweight. Well cut, properly tailored clothes that fit properly look much better.

Good posture makes an equally big difference.

And somehow, people who exude confidence seem to carry themselves better too.

HeavyHeidi · 18/03/2023 17:57

I agree (of course talking about healthy weight, not being dangerously underweight). I look amazing when I'm slim - everything looks great, could wear just a random potato sack and still look good. And my face is pretty. Put on just a few kg and whatever I wear is not a style statement but damage limitation, as everything clings to various rolls. I also have one of those faces that gets round loses any definition, not like some lucky people who still have slim faces even when they are larger.

learieonthewildmoor · 18/03/2023 18:00

I wear clothes that suit my shape and I think are beautiful. I feel happy with the way I look.
It can be a real struggle to stop hating your body. Be kinder to yourself. Take a friend shopping with you who can balance out those negative thoughts about yourself.

Tanfastic · 18/03/2023 18:03

I agree. I love fashion and clothes but put on a lot of weight last year and was bursting out of everything and nothing looked nice. I bought bigger sizes but felt frumpy and lumpy in everything, I was particularly heavy round my middle though. Since then I've gone down a dress size since Xmas, belly has reduced massively and I'm starting to feel so much better in my clothes!

Definitely makes a difference to me.

Chestersrevenge · 18/03/2023 18:08

I agree and disagree. Not helpful!

I look appalling in my current state as I carry weight on my front so have big stomach, large boobs etc.

My sister is totally different and carries weight on her hips and has a small bust and she has a waist, so the right clothes do look good on her!

Purplepeopleeaterz · 18/03/2023 18:13

Agree but since buying more tailored clothes I'm feeling a lot happier about how I look. Can’t wear anything jersey anymore and high waist wide leg trousers with a more fitted top is my go too.

EarringsandLipstick · 18/03/2023 18:13


I'm a bit on the fence.

Ultimately it's about confidence, as well as inherent beauty. I know several women who are not thin, but are beautiful & confident & while not very overweight, are certainly not skinny - and they look amazing.

For me, being slim = attractive but I suspect that's because it plays into my own confidence & pressure I put on myself around body shape.

I do agree that broadly, skinny people can wear almost anything & look well. I know that ranges like Zara or H&M suit slim figures, those who are heavier have to work harder to find clothes.

hopeishere · 18/03/2023 18:21


Particularly in summer. I look awful in summer. Not wafty and cool but chubby, hot and uncomfortable.

Luredbyapomegranate · 18/03/2023 18:23

I think it’s hard to look great when you’re very overweight (which I am currently), but I think lots of people can carry off a fairly well covered body - it depends a bit on how you carry the weight and a bit on how you style yourself.

I’m guessing the small changes you notice between a BMI of 23 to 26 Op are partly only visible to you and party due to clothes being bought for the smaller size.

Zerobeero · 18/03/2023 18:25

Completely agree. Especially in summer. Clothes shopping is so so depressing.

Tellyaddict123 · 18/03/2023 18:26

I disagree, I think it’s about confidence. I’ve seen some skinny people with no confidence, hunched over and couldn’t pick them out of a line. I’ve met some more curvy girls who absolutely rock with confidence and people flock to them.

FrownedUpon · 18/03/2023 18:29

I agree. I look so much better thin. Clothes just hang better.

mynameiscalypso · 18/03/2023 18:30

I agree. I could have written your post - some age, same weight, same history of eating disorders (albeit my last relapse was only a a few years ago). Part of my problem is that I don't feel healthy at the moment, mainly due to long terms steroids and mobility issues which have meant that I've basically become a human slug.

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