Losing weight is the ONLY way to look good :(

@Bamboux you arre not carrying excess weight at BMI 20 neither is anyone else with that BMI, maybe you feel better at 18.5 and that is absolutely fine and a healthy weight, there is no need for you to increase it to 20; however objectively BMI 20 is not an excessive weight I do not need to see your body to know that anyone with BMI of 20 is not overweight ( the meaning of excess weight)
Excess weight is not a subjective term it is used specifically to mean weight above which is healthy it does not mean weighing more than or having a different shape to what I would like,

Yes, I agree with this I think.

I am aware I'm not overweight in terms of my BMI, but there are specific parts of my body which are 100% definitely carrying excess weight. There is no need for my body to cart around bags of fat that does nothing.

Fat on my belly or thighs is completely non-functional - it adds nothing at all to the functionality of my body - it is simply a drain on my body's resources.

It makes me feel uncomfortable and look awful. In that sense it is excessive - it exceeds what my body needs.

It is not a coincidence that this has happened since covid - I lost my daily gym habit, have been drinking etc. far too much, and at the moment I don't feel like I will ever again reach the levels of health, leanness and fitness that I had before the pandemic.

What’s changed since the pandemic? Gyms have been open since April 2021 - surely you’re able to get back into things now?!

You know you will feel and look better, so just do it! :)


(Unless there are other things going on in your life which are getting in the way.)

What a batshit thread. Peak mumsnet 🤣🤣🤣

I've been back to the gym since the day they reopened (and then when they closed and reopened again), even when there weren't any classes.

Yes, there are other things going on in my life too, but I manage to go now roughly 3x a week, whereas pre-covid it was 6-7x a week.

That's why I said I lost the daily habit. I did do online classes for a long time even during lockdown.

I was at my absolute thinnest somewhere in the middle of the first lockdown, just a combination of everything led to a really bad relapse of my ED. Weight dropped well below healthy.

Then I started doing other (unhealthy) coping mechanisms to stop the ED, and then work started back up with a vengeance, family responsibilities, etc. I do still go to the gym but I feel like my mental and physical health took a really hard hit during covid.

Going to the gym makes me feel briefly better but it's not the panacea it was.

Could it be a hormone imbalance?

Exercise doesn’t make me feel as good as it once did too, and I am looking into whether it’s my hormones.

I recommend cutting out sugar and if possible go keto, as you will feel lighter (less water retention) and it will make exercise easier.


Good luck, you’ll get there :)

I think a good way to switch it up if the mentality of weight focus is draining is to focus on fitness, strength and body composition (% fat and muscle), doing a normal amount of exercise sessions, good diet. Muscle weighs more so it becomes less relevant.

I wish I could feel absolutely fantastic like this. What I found is I feel shite eating bad stuff but only 'ordinary' eating very well & low carb. I never hit the fantastic feeling.

Good muscle tone and fitness are just as important for me. My limbs would never be skinny unless I was severely ill, it's just not my build. I could do with losing some weight in terms of BMI but every single other measure - waist measurement v height, cholesterol, blood sugar, iron, blood pressure, resting heart rate is healthy, and I know my diet is a healthy balance and I take plenty of exercise and drink alcohol moderately so I've stopped worrying about my weight or counting calories, other than to have a quick nutritional balance check by logging food on Nutracheck every now and then. I've made long term positive lifestyle changes over the years which are sustainable and realistic. I'm 47, a size 12-14 and feel very confident in clothes or swimwear. If anything when I was younger and lighter my BP was so low that I'd get light-headed and dizzy from time to time, and that doesn't happen at all now as my BP is normal.

Hand on heart I looked awful at a size 8. I prefer my body at a size 14. That is the honest truth. I am hourglass shaped rather than apple.

Your post is completely right. Once you've accepted your bigger self, and you are feeling good and happy, only then are you able to change things and move forward. Losing weight when you are sad and depressed nigh on impossible. For me anyway. I fall right back into binge eating etc. I need to be a happy place to get to my natural healthy weight. Dieting never works.

Fat on my belly or thighs is completely non-functional - it adds nothing at all to the functionality of my body - it is simply a drain on my body's resources.

Woah! Absolutely not true if you're a woman.

That comment is actually concerning.

This whole thread is concerning.

so it is OK to say that 'I prefer to be a size 14 and not 8' but not the other way around?

Bloody hell, it's like the twilight zone in here!

[backs out slowly]

Right 🤣🤣🤣

Fucking hell at most of the replies on here!!! Did you all miss the point in the OP when she says she was previously anorexic?! You've all just come on and confirmed her deepest fear about weight gain and looking shit. Dickheads.

OP, I was previously anorexic and maintained a 'beautiful' figure with exercise being my drug. After a lot of therapy and self-reflection, the previous me can fuck off! I look back at photos and realise how terrible I look! Everyone was too polite around me to tell me the truth but I constantly looked gaunt and my already sharp features were exaggerated and looked sharper. I've gained weight since and realised that there are different clothes for different lifestyles/shapes/sizes and brands that prioritise one or the other. Yes, I'll never look good in clothes from the top brands that are designed and cut for people with a lot of money who are image conscious but then I'm not those people and definitely don't have that lifestyle! Think about what you like doing most (genuinely- not what others think you like) and what you'd be wearing in those situations and go from there. Also, please go for therapy if you already haven't. I tend to have days like your OP where the grass would be greener if I was XYZ when things around me are going to pot.

"Body fat is so much more than storage. Adipose tissue interacts with your entire body to maintain your metabolic homeostasis. Through chemical signals and adaptive responses, adipose tissue could even be said to function with intelligence — at least in the sense that other body systems do. And like other body systems, it can also function imperfectly, leading to a breakdown in various chemical processes that depend on it. The more we understand how interdependent all body systems are — including body fat — the more we understand how each one deserves our respect and care."

https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/body/24052-adipose-tissue-body-fat

Look, I’m currently a size 16 and I look better as a size 12 but most women over 45 who think they look better extra thin… don’t. They look haggard and old. That’s my non PC answer. Sorry.

Why are you sorry? People can either agree or disagree.

Agree. Can't believe the thread has been allowed to stand tbh. It's dangerous.

Personally, I think it s more about your confidence first rather than body type. If you are not confident with your body then no matter what your body type or branded clothes you are wearing. So it is better to have confidence in your body and to lose weight and being fit is also beneficial health-wise.