things that just don't work for you..

[HeavyHeidi]

Ordered another pleated midi skirt. In the ad and my imagination one would wear it with a simple plain t-shirt or blouse and it would make you look classic, elegant, have this summer in the city vibe.

In reality - Russian babushka with an arse the size of a small country.
It's always like that and every 6 months and so I will still order another, just to try if things have changed. They will not have changed.

Do others have stuff that just doesn't work as advertised?

In principle I agree that everyone should be able to find something to wear in the summer. But some years the general fashion just doesn't work for me. I remember distinctly the year when I got a massive payrise and was so excited to be able to go and buy a whole new summer wardrobe. I have a good waist, big boobs and suit fitted clothes and muted pastel colours. That year all shops sold boxy bright orange and green tops only..I looked like a nauseous square pumpkin.

I get what you mean about colours. I find shopping in autumn a nightmare as autumn colours just don't suit me.

Good job there’s a season for everyone

dark lipstick - want to look cool, actually look like a corpse.
eyeliner - less Charlotte Gainsbourg more Alice Cooper on a bad morning after.

anything with ruffles/tiers/peplum/pleats, I look like an evil character from a nursery rhyme.
can’t get on with any jeans but skinny as im
small and easily swamped.

* I would like to adopt the scandi/preppy/coastal beige look. I splashed out on a Toast dress and brown sandals. I looked like Sandi Toksvig at a retired maths teachers’ convention.*

I am a (almost) retired maths teacher and today I was wearing a Toast dress and brown sandals.

😂😂😂😂

I'll have to second the dungarees sb mentioned! They make me picture myself going to a dirty public toilet with the straps dragging along the wet floor... I should apply the same logic to jumpsuits but only the lord knows why I don't I just hold it in.

T shirts I just look like a bag of potatoes in them.

I’m sure you look lovely, @Oceanus . The toast clothes look perfect on many people, but not so much on the vertically challenged!

Btw as per every single year on MN, the hunt continues for those elusive sandals which are comfortable but don’t look like something from the Easilife catalogue (which for some reason I keep being sent - actually some quite useful-looking things in there ) . Posters do links to sandals but I can see through the internet a buckle which may rub, a toe post (noooooo!) , even one piece of dodgily-placed leather which spells blister hell. Atm I am wearing pink £4 Asda sliders which are not really fit for public consumption but at least don’t leave me limping and covered in plasters.

I bought some Rieker flat sandals in the sale last summer. They have sparkly bits on them and would probably be described as frumpy by most mumsnetters. They are incredibly comfortable - I walked 5 miles in them yesterday.

@RampantIvy - there is nothing less stylish than hobbling along with a face wincing in pain, so you will have the last (super stylish) laugh in your Riekers!

I've been living in comfy flip-flops from a supermarket too! Hahaha! At this point they're like an orange extension of my foot! As for the elusive comfortable sandal, the golden unicorn of all things to go on one's feet..! I wish I could go back to wearing Havaianas! I can't believe I used to live in them and now they feel like walking barefoot on pebbles.

Merrell sandals are amazing.

I bought a pair in New York about 15 years ago as the sandals I was wearing got drenched in a freak thunderstorm and they are definitely in the extensions of my feet camp now.

I got a compliment on them recently. I thought she was joking ('what, these old things?!') but she wasn't.

They are starting to die so I got two more pairs of Merrell which are also very comfortable.

Thanks for the heads-up @Aria999 I had never heard of Merrell, but jumped on their website after your account. I have bought a pair of slides in black in the sale for £24 (previously £40). They are not very attractive in black (no doubt that’s why they are in the sale, but all the nice colours are £45. I thought I’d try them and see if they suit my feet before spending more in my costly quest for the most comfortable sandals. I’ve previously got on perfectly with Fitflop post flipflops, but this year the post is bothering me.

Dh has merrells, so I can’t wear them too as I draw the line at looking like Howard and Hilda…

@Womenandwomenfirst 😂🤣😂🤣

High waist jeans or trousers make me look like Asterisk the Gaul, yellow and mustard make me look like I have liver problems.

Another Merrells fan here. I bought these prompted by another Mumsnet thread as I've been having problems finding comfortable sandals. They are not the most stylish ones I've ever had but they are flipping gorgeous to walk in and that now counts for more for me. I think they also look quite good and not too "walking sandal". I took them on holiday recently and didn't wear any other shoes.

www.merrell.com/UK/en_GB/terran-3-cush-lattice/52589W.html

I bought a lovely yellow Mac a few years ago. Wore it to the office in the rain to be greeted with ‘fuck me , a fisherman’s friend has arrived’ ….

😂 Brilliant!

Ive got a bright red Jules mac and look like Sue Pollard from Hi-di-Hi.

I had a lovely green tweedy cape. I felt great in it until a guy I know said 'Boom! Boom! It's Basil Brush!'

strychnine I am crying with laughter!

a friend of mine walked into work sporting a new poncho and a guy whistled the riff from ‘The Good, The Bad and The Ugly’ 😀

I am actually getting quite puzzled now. How come:

• shirred/smocked waist dresses (Hush Kensington type) are super flattering on me
• drawstring dresses - looking good
• So belted dresses should be lovely too, right? Just tried this one from Desigual and could go to a fancy dress party as sack of spuds with a string around it.

What is this sorcery?

@KatharinaRosalie this is the same for me too. Shirred waists are great, drawstring is OK or other elastic, but tie waists or belts are terrible

Oh and also smocked waist - great. Smocked but ending just under boobs - might as well wear a tent.