Would you ditch the dye?

[thesoundofthepolice]

Im 37 and my hair is so white, not even grey, it's pure white. i take after my mum who was the same, so much so I can't remember her with anything other than white hair. I need to dye it every 3-4 weeks and it's just such a chore.

The other issue is my hair is so dark and cool toned going lighter isn't really an option that won't be just as much hard work.

What would you do? Part of me wants to embrace the grey but I don't want to look old and haggard.

I have cool colouring and as such it was always a battle to match dye to my original ashy brown colour, the dye always ended up having an orange or red tone. I hated that I was always chasing my roots but also trying to eliminate the dreaded orange. Saving grace came in the form of a newly developed allergy to hair dye. Grey was on its way....but enough about me.

Perhaps the grey journey is best suited to us cool toned ladies. Our society seems forever in favour of those with the honey blonde hair and golden tans.

Grey is now the only time where cool leaning ladies look better than the warmer toned. I do wonder if the division in opinions is split between those of cool and warm toned?

I do wonder if the division in opinions is split between those of cool and warm toned?

It’s an interesting point. My pre grey hair had a lot of red in it which was particularly evident in strong sunlight. I think the point a lot of people miss is that it’s not just hair colour that changes but skin tone too, my skin is several shades lighter than it was when my hair was brown.

I genuinely don't think that grey hair has to be ageing. And certainly no more so than obviously dyed hair or visible grey roots. And why should we care, really? If your hair's grey, then that's how you naturally look at that age! I'm 40 and have a fair few white hairs (probably at least 20%) which I'm leaving, but I'm a natural blonde so they tone in really well and have sort of lightened my whole hair colour rather than making me look obviously grey. It suits my skin tone far better than when I used to have highlights and I don't feel it makes me look any older at all. I don't know how I'd feel if I were a dark brunette and the contrast was more obvious though... Not to say there's anything wrong with that at all (it can look very striking), but I'm aware that a high level of contrast must be a lot more difficult to get used to. I also think that we wouldn't find grey so ageing if more of us let it grow in naturally and the change was more gradual. I think the dramatic change of very dyed hair to sudden all-over grey is probably quite difficult to adjust to.

I agree.
My original hair colour and my grey hair is the only time the tone of my hair matched the tone of my skin.

I want to be gentle with you but I am not a fan. Maybe a transitional couple of years having low lights might ease you into going 'au naturelle'. Wearing more colourful clothing and a bit of lipstick will help cheer up the whole look.

"doing that app that suggests a colour for you"

What's that app?

[quote grey12]@SunshineCake about the badger stripe? I didn't name it! sorry if the name offends you. But the longer you keep dyeing your hair dark the more contrasting to the whites it will become! You start dyeing every few months and end up having to do it every couple of weeks otherwise it does not look good. Count me out... I personally hate going to the hairdressers![/quote]
Not you!

@Gwenhwyfar

"doing that app that suggests a colour for you"

What's that app?

It's Garnier. I thought it would suggest a colour so my greys weren't so obvious but it seems more to suggest an all over colour.

@Hayeahnobut

So many beautiful greys!

For those saying they look older, I guess you mean they look their age. There's absolutely nothing wrong with looking your age.

No, I mean older than their age.

I like the ashy look, though,

I think grey hair is so ageing on young women, however great it may look. It really is a personal choice though.

"It's Garnier. I thought it would suggest a colour so my greys weren't so obvious but it seems more to suggest an all over colour."

That's what I want. I have tried the Garnier thing, but couldn't get it to work.

OP I have a similar natural colour hair except mine was dyed auburn. I got sick of dyeing it, the dye sometimes stung and itched and I felt embarrassed with my white line between appointments.

I went lighter blonder so it was less noticeable which I loved that than gradually started letting the grey come through just before lock down (the hairdresser to put toners on). Then lockdown happened and I have embraced the grey. I am still not convinced I suit it and it doesn’t make me look a lot older than my 50 odd years (especially as all my friends slightly older, the same age and slightly younger still dye their hair). But it is liberating not worrying about the white line and booking hair appointments around social events.

Like @ChoporNot mine is also naturally curly and a similarly length but not as good a cut or as nicer curl. Yours is absolutely lovely and what I am aiming for if I can persevere. What products are you using on your hair please its fabulous?

I'm in the in-between camp.
My brother and sister have both gone grey, and their hair looks good, my sister's especially (hers is a really nice silver colour).
Mine in the meantime is making an attempt to go grey, but not very successfully:
In a way, I know it's going to go grey, so I wish it would get on with it!
I'm tempted to go with a full-on 'Mallen-streak' if you know what I mean, just to get it kick-started.

@SunshineCake sorry

I'm 33 and mine looks like yours. I'm leaving it now. So much easier and cheaper plus I no longer feel a slave to expectations.

@GooseberryTart I finally succombed to full on Curly Girl Method about 18 months ago (had been vaguely doing it for years) and it has really helped.

I use Faith in Nature Dragon fruit to co-wash, condition (squish the conditioner in lots) and then as a tiny bit of leave in.

I then use Pantene no 5 Mousse on very wet hair, comb it through and then squish in from the bottom to the top Aussie Instant Freeze gel. Squish excess water out with an old t-shirt and leave to air-dry.

It did take a fair few months for my hair to really "ping" once I started . Now I can get day 2/3/4 hair (used to have to wet it everyday). Silk or satin pilllow slip and putting hair in a half-pineapples helps that.

[quote grey12]@SunshineCake sorry [/quote]
It's okay .

Not going to lie @MadDoggoLady I was a bit 'relaxed' when I posted that. My point stands though. I don't think grey hair automatically makes one look older. It's a tired stereotype. I was as dark as dark could be when I was young. Now I'm grey all over. I don't look worse, I look different, but I've always been very keen about myself.

Too many women don't like themselves. I'm not one.

@ShrikeAttack you do you - with cheekbones like that who cares what colour hair you have

@ShrikeAttack your hair looks light brown to me.

I like grey hair on some people but I agree it is aging, can be very striking and often lovely but I do think it's always aging. That's just me though and I wish I was brave enough to give it a go.

I'm just an advocate for the 'unfucked-aboutwith' older woman @MadDoggoLady.

We don't need to mangle ourselves with dye or botox or fillers.

I only look good because I'm confident. I don't look in the mirror and see flaws. I look in the mirror and see a beautiful woman.

I like myself.

And that's much of the battle. Saying "I like myself'.

Love every pic posted l!

shrikesttack you and your hair rock

Gorgeous hair!

No, it is grey @Mii