I look like a parsnip in skinny jeans (big arse, big thighs, skinny legs below that). Just no way. There's a point where no matter how fashionable something is you just can't look good in it. I'd rather look like an unfashionable leek than a fashionable parsnip.
Straight leg jeans, IME, aren't that at all - they taper just as much as skinnies but just do it while clinging less - hello, baggy parsnip.