What does one wear to a swingers club?

[SnowNotSoWhite]

Apart from not a lot
Have no intention of getting totally bare assed in public so any ideas on nice lingerie and clothes that would, be, ahem, accommodating?

Victorian, you need to go and find out for yourself and take me with you. Go on, you are gagging for it, like me, if you'll pardon the pun.

Since this thread, we've registered with a few websites, but I am a wee bit concerned about "obligations" when meeting 2 on 2. It is weird, trying to balance fussiness (after all, what's the point if one isn't sexually attracted to someone?) and the knowledge that we are "not all that" ourselves.

Well, I was more bothered about what we were doing tbh, although I enjoyed just sitting and watching everyone in their lovely outfits and having the odd chat with people, eating snacks and having a drink.

Mostly variations on the theme of "tie someone to a thing, hit them with another thing" There were a few people doing other stuff that was fascinating, too, but I wouldn't even know how to start describing it.

Lots of collars etc, quite a lot of clothes seemed to be shed over the evening, but everyone still looked fabulous. Most people were actually fully clothed, unlike swingers things that I've been to. A lot more social - felt like a house party. I immediately felt at home.

And cuddling. Lots of cuddling.

I've never met up with anyone for anything off a website - going to a group thing is much less pressure in my head. But I've not actually "done" much at all, so ignore me

Yes, the way things are looking, we won't be meeting anyone off a website either. Imagine getting there and they have bad teeth and racist views. Nah, we will have to go to a club by the looks of it, or a party. They do have them in our town, so we'll see.

I never really "got on" with the swingers websites, or at least the ones I looked at - I let XH deal with that but we only went to one club anyway, everything else was random friends/acquaintances/people in nightclubs.

I use a fetish website now though, which is lovely. I think it's more of a "lifestyle" thing, and there's a lot to discuss, and lots of photos etc (I suppose a swingers website basically can just have photos of people shagging lots of other people, which is fun to do but I'm not overly interested in looking at pictures of, but theres are loads of pictures of people doing fetishy things where there is no sexual activity or anything at all, you just have to get your head around the fact that there will be a lot of pictures that aren't the things you are into, and just click past if they end up on your screen somehow, because people are into all sorts and that's cool)(one of my favourite pictures was a couple, cuddling, obviously after having done something rope based as she was nude and there was rope scattered on the floor. I'm very cuddle motivated, really...)

I'm not a fan of the sites either - I just don't trust them, I use them for ideas and research though and DH doesn't like parties because they're not secure. We were members of 2 clubs in London which we loved to go to and had many friends there. We live in Germany now and I really cannot wait to explore the clubs in Berlin and see which is best for us.

CuntyBunty Indeed.

From my experience of using websites it can be a bit hit and miss but I would recommend having a purely social meet first. No expectations or pressure, meet for a drink in a nice bar, get to know each other and see how comfortable you feel. I would never recommend going to a couple's home if you haven't met them as you just don't know who they are and how you will get on. There is one website I'm on where people write ' verifications', ie almost a review of what a person/ couple was like. I have found that very helpful re deciding whether to mee someone. It's a bit like Trip Advisor but for sex..!!:)

• meet, obviously! ( not some new slang for sex...)

Thanks Destiny, I think we will.

To Anyone i was having a debate about various sex toys with a friend and we talked about the more exotic types and i thought id ask on here and see if anyone has used a chastity belt or butt plugs ?

Lots of people. Even Anne Summers sells butt plugs. Chastity belts as far as I can tell are more of a gay man thing. Or, at least, the only people I know that play with them are gay men.

To anyone which types of vibrators are common in swinger / bdsm events (assuming people use these at these types of events) ?

There are some amazing clothes on those club sites, the latex, leather, steampunk outfits and corsetry for example, where do people get them where they can try them on? That gear looks a bit expensive to just buy untried off the net.

Numanoid Ann summers sells some of the clothes you have described.

Bondara.co.uk has a good choice. Can't link because I am in I-phone. If you wanted something tamer, Boux Avenue do nice old school type suspender belts. I am just going to wear my baby doll, knickers, stockings and suzzies the first time I go and see if I like it before investing in anything more "niche". Happy shopping.

Oh, and FMBs as well, of course.

Numanoid if you are in London, Camden market is a great place to go get clothes you can try on. There are also shops such as Honour, Fairy Gothmother, House of Harlot etch. There are fetish fairs once a month too and a few times a year huge fetish expos where there are lots of different stalls and often discounts. But yes, the stuff's not cheap!

This is the Fairy gothmother website. Beautiful corsets!

www.fairygothmother.co.uk/Corsets.htm

I got my Edwardian long line corset from Fairy Gothmother. Brilliant shop.

I remember being in the "fitting room" and saying to the assistant "What's that big handle on the wall for?" I find out really quickly.

Liberation in Covent Garden has gorgeous rubber kit. Libidex in Camden too. They are happy for you to try stuff on. Both have websites so you can create your own personal fetish flavour of outfit. Another big beautiful website is Westward Bound. Delicious confections.

Once you start looking you'll be surprised where the smut shops are.

So pleased to see that this thread has warmed up. Reading the first few pages I was sad that mumsnetters were making fun of something different, but now I see the thread has opened out thank god. Happy swinging!!!

Something Amen to that.

Don't buy the clothes from Ann Summers if you want it to last more than one wear. It's all novelty hen night stuff. I used to sell it (very successfully I might add) and I know!

(just get some rope and a skilled person to make it into an outfit )