So many problems with SC

[M2p]

I have been a SM for about a year, SS 12 SD 9 yet I feel like this is just getting worse as it goes along.
At first yes it wasn't too bad, meeting them starting to get to know them but as time has gone on I've found myself separating myself from the situation trying to keep busy when their here. So they are very fussy eaters, will never try anything new and if I cook something ive made before that I know they like sometimes they say they don't like it and won't eat. If I don't have dinner done at a certain time all hell breaks loose and it's like I'm starving them to death but they never moan to me about it they go to their dad. They ignore me, even when my P is around, they will ask him questions to ask me. It's even worse when he's not in the house which is a fair bit as he works and he leaves them with me multiple times in the week, i will ask if their hungry and they will just say no all the time, but as soon as my P comes home the first thing they will say is their hungry and haven't ate like I've done it on purpose. Also SD stares at me all the time i can see her out of the corner of my eye. Sometimes she will just stand with her head poking round the door while im doing something it makes me so uncomfortable. These are just the main things there is also little other things that goes on aswell, has anyone ever experienced anything like this before?

OP, before he moved in, would you have had the money to go to your friend's caravan? Usually when a man like this moves in he ends up costing the woman a lot of money.

@MounjaroOnMyMind yeah I would of

@M2p it’s YOUR house!! You don’t need to leave you just need to say NO To step kid coming tonight and ask your ‘partner’ to get the hell out.

Oh god. He needs to move out and take responsibility for his kids.

Sorry to be crude but it seems you have taken in a cockloger who sees you a as "the nanny with the fanny." What exactly do you get out of this relationship? Does he pay rent, does he pay for the living costs of his kids being there? Does he do his share of housework and cooking?

It's your house. Chuck him and his DCs out and get a cat.

Honestly, I'd pack up his things and tell him to go back to his ex. They are both cut from the same cloth and deserve each other.

@KnottyKnittinghe does pay but no he doesn't do housework or cook because in his words 'I work'

And you sit around all day waiting to serve him and his kids ?!

🤣

I’m sorry but what?!

Do you work?

@MellowPinkDeer apparently yes lol

@AnneLovesGilbert yes but I think he thinks his job is more tiring for him as he works 3 more hours a day than me

Basically this

@M2p

Have you texted him to tell him you won't be available yet?

This man is giving me the ick by the minute. You deserve so much more than this.

Before you posted on here @M2p did you at any point think there were issues with this relationship?

Is there a reason why you tolerate this? I can't think of one but perhaps there's something I haven't thought of

@Buttonsbuttons yes and he looked at it and hasn't replied

@crumblingschools definitely ive spoken too friends and family but i wanted strangers views on the situation, it's took me alot of courage posting on here as I didn't want him to find out

@MostlyHappyMummy I think it's more a case of ive settled into this and I don't like confrontation at all but I do need too

There's a surprise. He wasn't expecting you to say you were busy and is probably thinking about the huge guilt trip he needs to lay on you to get you back in line.

My bets would be:

1.But DSS will be so disappointed

2.Can't you rearrange your plans?

3.I won't get to see my children and ill be sad.

4.My work is really stressing me out, don't add to my stress levels just do as you're told.

Don't back down. We're here to cheer you on to getting your life back.

Have you had similar relationships? You said you had been together before he moved in, how did the relationship work then?

@Buttonsbuttons I'll keep updated on what he says, I have no idea what he will say

@crumblingschools never had a relationship like this one at all, yeah it was all fine but I don't know if he was happy set in his ways

Just thought of another one,

1. Don't you like my kids, they want to spend time with you? ( trying to make out you're the bad one).

If he comes back with a massive guilt trip, I'd counter with:

'Look, we need to talk. I don't feel like this relationship is right for me anymore. Probably best if you see the kids elsewhere for a while whilst we sort this out'.

You sound lovely but ‘nanny with a fanny’ comes to mind. He is getting a lot a lot from you. And not giving much in return

I hope you said no, that won't work for me.