So many problems with SC

[M2p]

I have been a SM for about a year, SS 12 SD 9 yet I feel like this is just getting worse as it goes along.
At first yes it wasn't too bad, meeting them starting to get to know them but as time has gone on I've found myself separating myself from the situation trying to keep busy when their here. So they are very fussy eaters, will never try anything new and if I cook something ive made before that I know they like sometimes they say they don't like it and won't eat. If I don't have dinner done at a certain time all hell breaks loose and it's like I'm starving them to death but they never moan to me about it they go to their dad. They ignore me, even when my P is around, they will ask him questions to ask me. It's even worse when he's not in the house which is a fair bit as he works and he leaves them with me multiple times in the week, i will ask if their hungry and they will just say no all the time, but as soon as my P comes home the first thing they will say is their hungry and haven't ate like I've done it on purpose. Also SD stares at me all the time i can see her out of the corner of my eye. Sometimes she will just stand with her head poking round the door while im doing something it makes me so uncomfortable. These are just the main things there is also little other things that goes on aswell, has anyone ever experienced anything like this before?

@M2p

Really, what is there to 'talk about'. He's treating you like an unpaid servant, a 'nanny with a fanny'. He's with you because it's convenient for him.And you are so obviously unhappy and deserve so much better. An honest man who will respect you and treat you right.

Before you meet, take a moment to realize how peaceful and calm your life would be without him in it. And chances are, how much better off you will be financially. And should you still want a relationship in your future remember that you will never meet Mr Right when you're entangled with Mr Wrong.

Don't let him talk you round. Don't let him DARVO you into thinking this is your fault.

He will pull out all the stops today - to make it seem like he is the victim in all of this.

Please dont be a sucker, remain calm, distant and disengage from him.

So you give him:

1. Housing
2. Utilities
3. Food/cooking for 3
4. Housework for 3
5. Childcare

He gives you:

1. Expense
2. Attitude
3. Work/mess/increase in bills

Anything missing from the lists?
What does he do to enhance or improve your life?

Run for hills OP.
this just has a lifetime of misery written all over it for everybody all of you, including him in the long-term

I imagine it is more of a punishment for her having him dossing on her sofa when he isn’t cock lodging at the OPs! She is going to be very upset when he announces he doesn’t have a place to take the children and his fragrant self out of her house.

OP if you meet him and he's back to Mr Charming Remember The Good Times...remind yourself that its only yesterday he said how he really feels.

"Tbh I don't give a fuck what you want right now.
I'll do what's best for the kids and me."

He is an arch manipulator, and an angry one at that.
He will definitely try to bully you into taking him back, and everything that comes with it - because that is what is best for him and his kids - being back in YOUR home, at Your expense with you doing all the work.
And he will promise anything and say anything to reel you in again.

Stay strong. This is really hard as its all come to a head so quickly. It happens to a lot of people and it's not your fault that you trusted someone who has no concern for anyone but himself, and sometimes it takes a while to see that.
I really hope you are able to extricate yourself, stay safe, and go on to enjoy your freedom.

This is so true. He will quickly have you exactly where he wants you. Please don’t give him even the tiniest of ins. This man will break you. You have done brilliantly so far. And you’re over the worst of it now. Locks, bin bags, block. Job done.

Stay strong OP. Don't fall for his bull.

I can see why his kids don't like you, after you said the two of you were dating for several years while he was allegedly separated from his wife but sleeping on the couch in their shared home. Unless I read that wrong, it sounded very strange to me.

I'm wondering if his wife and children knew he was separated?

OP says in her OP that they have been together for about a year.

No, that's incorrect. Here's what she said:

M2p · 11/04/2025 09:32
he says he goes get them so he can see them more yet goes to work and leaves them with me. Weve been together for a few years but living together for a year

@MarkingBad they have been together a few years but only living together a year

Thanks for the correction @BigHeadBertha and @crumblingschools

I’d love to think that the OP has spent the afternoon packing up his things and will check in later to update. In reality I fear he is back at her home, watching sport on the TV, whilst she cooks Sunday lunch for everyone.

Would you be together if you were living separately? )or does he just need cheap lodgings to bring his kids to?)

How does he enhance your life?

I hope you’re okay OP.

Your reasons for posting were bad enough.

Then the posts where you tell us how you do everything, just get left with his kids, etc. were infuriating.

But the posts telling us about his reactions, his manipulation, his arrogance, his pure contempt for you? Those are something else. Chilling, really.

This man doesn’t love you. He doesn’t even like you. He cares only for what you can provide and do for him.

You deserve so much better than him (so do his kids, but not your problem).

Omg get rid! What a cheeky fucker, he sounds awful I’m afraid. Hope you can get him out of your home soon.

OMG! I have just read through this thread. OP I really hope you are ok, and are at home ALONE, enjoying a quiet glass of wine after giving that idiot the boot!

Just tell him you are not parenting them, you are not their parent.

It's HER house!

@M2p i hope you’ve+managed to stay strong and the message ‘Get out’ has been heard loud and clear.
Please dint let him stay ‘until he finds somewhere to stay’ etc…. He’ll grind you down!!

Be prepared for the sob stories.
Be prepared for the “ how can you throw away all we have” whine.
Be prepared for “ I don’t know how this will affect my children” cue sad face, maybe he’ll squeeze out a tear.

He’ll try everything he can to stay because he knows he’ll have to leave, actually look after his own children AND pay his way properly.
He’s a user.

He’ll try everything to avoid his cushy life being disrupted. Be prepared for it and stand firm.

He can use a public bathroom for fgs.

It's it amazing how these "no place to stay" men will always find a woman with her own house to latch on to.

They never ever fall in love with a women who is living in a house share or caring for elderly parents etc. It is always a single woman with enough room for their kids too.

Just cut him off completely. The children csn stay with their mum. If he has to sleep in his car....tough shit....it's nice weather anyway.