Okay step parents, shoot me down, flame me, barbecue me. Jammi & youcannotbeserious welcome Maybe I should have name changed!
I am expressing my initial and current feelings, rightly or wrongly.
I picked up DS (4) this afternoon, and apparently DS - told me - that new SDad was upset, because as DS was waiting for me he opened the inner door (of a flat type block safe place - second intercom door) and closed it, cos he thought I was there - he says he saw me in the window. He was told not to do that by SD.
Now at night, many many hours later, as he is supposed to say bye at bedtime on the phone, she says you been naughty today, (she says its not my business on what) and then makes him explain to her why he was naughty, he says he thought I was at the door, but she says when she or DP say no, he must listen, and then when he says sorry, she puts DP on phone and he has to agree he was naughty again and apologise to DP, who says you are nice most of the time, but naughty some of the time. She then comes back on and says when anyone, especially her or him say no, he must obey.
DS says to me they will be happy now, and when they say no, they mean no.
Note before new DH SD, there was no such absolute discipline. New DH became DH about 2 weeks ago, and was new DP 3 months now.
Okay so its my DS, and she is an X, and he is new DH (who I haven't met yet), and surely I am biased, and I have different levels of no means no (only for the most dangerous or bad behaviour). But I still feel annoyed that DS was made to say sorry to both over such a trivial thing to me, at bedtime over the phone so many hours later.
Go on set me straight - I'm new to this. No doubt over reacting to this, and it really isn't my business. (but still annoyed)