Holidays with or without DSD

[terracottasaucer]

How do you manage holidays with step children? I feel like I’m not allowed a holiday with my own children, and made to feel evil for even wanting to.

This is nonsense reasoning…

Isn’t it just

I personally see no problem with it at all, along as they go away themselves aswel to the same sort of place I.e foreign country etc and aren't missing out. My partner pays more than enough in child maintenance and gives the children extra money as and when. They also go on holiday with their mother and we put towards that too. Unfortunately not made of money that can sometimes pay for them to come too. So I certainly won't let my children miss out. Everyone has always been happy with that

Speaking my words, we argue constantly about holidays, I want to go away with just our 2 small kids too but am constantly made to feel guilty…and also a ‘always plan things when shes not here’ … and?

This is how it should be, balance & compromise

The only selfish choice I make with regards DSC is the weeks holiday a year we have without them. We always go away with them too, they go away with their mum and DH takes them camping for a week on his own. But Im aware that they may resent it, especially the rare years where we've gone abroad but stayed in the UK with them.

But they WON'T do sightseeing -- whether that is historical, religious, cultural, natural world. If you make them they are rude, obnoxious and completely ruin it. Our DC do these things quite happily. A manageable holiday with DSC is either a resort with a pool or a cottage near a beach in England with some watersports. I don't mind that but I can't imagine living for over a decade never going to a castle or a museum or an art gallery or a nature reserve or a cathedral etc.

This is my life too and it is not my fault that they have been brought up very differently. Their DM is disinterested in anything cultural and my DH has failed to effectively counteract this. Both parents have not tackled the rudeness and lack of willingness to try something different or to put up with an hour or so a day which is not totally tailored to them.

So, it depends on your reasons and the context. But sometimes, yes, a holiday without DSC is not the worst crime in the world (though it probably remains a selfish choice).

Why do so many step mothers think it is OK or their partners EX tot ake them on holiday and that be enough and god forbid they hsould go on holiday with their father becuase that would mean they get two holidays

Sadly my 2 have suffered this and believe me they know. They know their Dd goes no holiday with their half sibling and step kids and they never do. They do not understand it and no me taking them away does not make up for it - and no he does not contirbute to my holidays

im 35 and my dad remarried had more kids and we did have one or two caravan holidays. i lived with my mum full time and saw my dad and siblings every weekend. then one year i was about 9/10 and my dad went on a few abroad holidays jus him his wife and their kids. they brought me back lots pf ‘stuff’ but u never ever forget the sting of rejection as a child.
later on i learned that she wanted a holiday just them and because i sometimes went on holiday with my mum it was fair.
so years later i dont ever forget that feeling of rejection.
i hope u include your step child