Child maintenance payments going up

[C96x]

Hi everyone,

I’m abit stumped here- my other half’s CSA payments have gone up since his daughter no longer wants to come to stay with us(age 9) we respect her wishes even though it’s not nice to not be able to see her due to location.
His CSA payments have gone up which quite right but they have gone up so much that we now are making ends meet- I get that she is now full time with her mum but I really do not agree with the amounts CSA agree too especially when we have mortgage to pay for. This will also impact if she ever does want to come over as we won’t have the money like we used to, to go places/ days out etc…

Mum has other children who she gets CSA payments for as well as child benefit, they also receive free school meals too (she’s an open person). as well as living with parents.

there’s probably nothing we can do here but do CSA take in to count mortgage payments when it comes to earnings? my partner has had access/ overnight stays since she was 1 so all of sudden to have this extra increase each month outgoing now it’s a shock to the system. any advice would be appreciated!

Just to add Dad will pay what he is expected too always has and always will

Mrs Sunshine-not sure you could get more patronising.

You consider the £3000 maintenance covers the 44 weeks that the RP has the child so the RP ahs no costs associated with that child during the 8 weeks that they are with you?

However, you consider the costs of having SD all year -room and travel etc but do not let mum consider those. You consider mum has no travel costs associated with SD because she works at the school, pays for extra curricular activities which your DP does not contirbute to and somehow by magic gets her there.

You are not comparing like with like.

I didn't say the RP has no costs during that 8 weeks. At no stage have I claimed to know what her Mum spends on things, that's her choice, as it's our choice what optional extras we provide. The travel costs are only for the train tickets we pay for. Most of SD's extra curriculars are within walking distance, however I have not, at any point, said that her Mum spends no money on travel. I have said that WE spend no money on travel for OUR daughter because we walk to most places and the amount of extra petrol involved in her coming places with us is negligible. I believe £3000 covers more than half of the essential costs of having a child, especially when you factor in child benefit. It would cover more than half of my daughter's costs. It's nothing to do with 8 weeks with us or whatever.

And you keep saying I'm not comparing like with like....I'm comparing my own child with my stepdaughter, are they not alike?

There are some additional costs in having a child in two homes. So we're paying half of all the costs when she's with her Mum (£50pw) and 100% of all costs when she's with us including the cost of travelling to us.

If you're spending more than £100pw per child (including in the weeks they aren't even with you!), you are making very expensive choices.

If you're spending more than £100pw per child (including in the weeks they aren't even with you!), you are making very expensive choices

You know the cost of holiday care, wraparound care, clubs and other activities?

Wraparound care at my daughter's school is £10 a day, holiday club is £30 a day, so you could potentially spend £3900pa if you sent your child to wraparound care every school day and holiday club every day of the holidays (not open on bank holidays anyway) and that is reduced to £3120 when taking into account tax free childcare. That's £60 per week and if they are in full time wraparound care/childcare they're not going to be doing many extra-curriculars are they.

And it only applies for Primary School anyway.

My DH pays 498.00 on a 30k salary. That's hard. We have very little. 400.00 on 40k is not that bad.

That must be for several children?

Ouch ….

I've just done a calculation on CMS on a salary of £30k as that did seem a large amount. I assumed 3 children with fewer than 1 overnight a week and it still only comes to £473. So it's either for even more children or it includes arrears.
So yes, £498 is a lot but if a man has 3/4 children then it does cost a lot to raise them.

I genuinely think men think they should be able to move on to the next family consequence free and simply wash their hands of their financial responsibility to their own children.

I'm genuinely laughing at the poster who thinks that you can feed a growing child for £25 per week, which works out as £3.57 per day for 3 meals plus snacks. This truly must be a joke

We spend ~£75pw in the supermarket for a family of 3 and closer to £100pw in the weeks we have my SD. I think that's a fairly average weekly supermarket bill. That works out at £25pp.

www.moneyhelper.org.uk/en/blog/supermarket-savings/how-does-your-household-food-spend-compare

You cannot be serious?

It can be done @Hoardasurass It takes a bit of planning but that's about what I spend.

I cook from scratch, and manage to include meat, fish and plenty of fruit & veg in that. I assume 50p for breakfast (wholemeal toast, butter, jam, fruit), £1 for lunch and £2 for supper. My ds is at the hollow legged stage so it is a challenge but we do ok.

Surely parents should consider their obligation to financially support their children before buying property and having more children

We don’t all have one child. And many of us pay more than £10 a day for wraparound care.

Lots,of,extracurricular,at the weekends. And early evening.

I don't see how that's possible

It's not even out of the ordinary. That's a family of 4 spending £100 a week at the supermarket. There's a website called "Feed your family for £20 a week" which gives meal plans covering breakfast, lunch and dinner coming to around £20 for 7 days.

Add to that that any child aged 4-7 gets a free school lunch Mon-Fri (and some throughout school based on household income) and £25pp is easily doable.

My stepdaughter is here now and this is next week's mealplan:

Lunch
Sausage sandwiches
(Out for lunch)
Bacon sandwiches
Quesadillas
Egg mayo sandwiches
Russian salad
Picnic

Dinner
Sweet and savoury crepes
Salmon and creme fraiche tagliatelle
Fajitas
Macaroni Cheese
Philly Cheesesteak baguettes
Swedish meatballs
Katsu Curry

I've ordered everything I need on Amazon/Morrison's and it came to £70.

@Chichimcgee Tonight we have citrus chicken, brown rice, broccoli & peas, then fresh nectarines with creme fraiche and flaked almonds. It'll cost £3.60 plus the electric to fry the chicken and steam the rice/veg. Maybe £3.80 altogether.

Thanks, there's myself, teen and toddler and I'm spending £150 a week when son is at school eating there, daughter full time twice a week so no meals for her then. Will check out the website thanks