partner won't let my child come round anymore

[jonjonuk22]

im having troubles with the whole adapting as a step parent. recently my partner thinks im being extremely disrespectful to her child who lives with us, and has now resulted in issues when my daughter comes round.

she now says, my daughter is not welcome in the house anymore and i should make alternative arrangements rather then staying at my home.

until i can be more respectful to her child that's the way it will be

i don't think this is right regardless of her reasons for saying it, i believe it should never come to me having to find alternative arrangements when my child is with me at the weekends.

she thinks this is ok and our relationship shouldn't be affected by it and i should accept it and that its wrong that my child is a factor in our relationship like this

is this right to just accept this ?

I think you'll have to move out and start afresh

Yet you call it 'my house'. How much do you contribute, financially and housework wise? Maybe your girlfriend is pissed off with you and expressing it in her own way.

How does your daughter behave when at the house, is she bossy/ entitled?

He never called it 'his house' at all. He called it 'my home'.

Is it not?

To be honest, you sound incompatible. Blending families is about more than the two adults involved, the relationships with the children are equally important, if not more so. You are clearly struggling to connect with her daughter, and your partner doesn't appear to feel particularly warmly towards your daughter (otherwise she wouldn't find it so easy to ban her from the house). Her daughter's needs might prevent her from ever living independently, which means that if you and your partner stay together/marry/buy a house, this will be your life for the foreseeable future - are you okay with that. In your partner's shoes I would think twice about being in a relationship with a man who cannot engage with my child, yet has no difficulty in telling her off. I don't think either of you are particularly in the wrong here - you just sound like two incompatible families.

Move out for the sake of your own child.

No one would ever get away with telling me not to see my children in my home. You need to move out to make this person understand your dd comes first. When I remarried I made it perfectly clear to dhtb me and my children are a package. If he wants me he accepts and is kind to my DC too. He is a great stepdad to them. If he was not I would leave.

This woman is a controlling bully. You need to leave.

You should move back out of her house. She needs to put her child first and you need to do the same for yours.

Clearly this is not happening while living together.

Move out now. If your daughter isn't welcome, then you can't possibly live there anymore.

Why on earth are yous together. This is a horrid situation. Just leave .

ZOMBIE THREAD

She says your relationship depends on your child… that is 10,000% how it should be. Make plans to move out asap. Stop letting someone destroy your relationship with your child.

ZOMBIE

Break up already

I think this is appalling

Dump her

"im having troubles with the whole adapting as a step parent. recently my partner thinks im being extremely disrespectful to her child who lives with us, and has now resulted in issues when my daughter comes round.

she now says, my daughter is not welcome in the house anymore and i should make alternative arrangements rather then staying at my home.

until i can be more respectful to her child that's the way it will be

I don't think this is right regardless of her reasons for saying it, i believe it should never come to me having to find alternative arrangements when my child is with me at the weekends."

You have some nerve.

It's okay that she's trying to protect her child and her space from a partner who she feels is extremely disrespectful to her child. ..and she doesn't want either child around this type of behavior and atmosphere.

Neither one of you probably shouldn't have ever been involved with one another and blended families.

She's absolutely correct in wanting you gone and your child. Your child isn't her responsibility, only yours.

It's your job to find an alternative home for you and your child. It's not her job to mind your child, just because you are no longer there.

If you don't think that you can be a respectful stepfather, a respectful partner, end things permanently.

Bed warmer?? She’s given him a roof over his head as he hadn’t provided one for himself and his child, he’s been disrespectful to her kid in their own home, and she’s a bed warmer? Only a the bitter would call the new woman a bed warmer.

Who dug up a 2022 thread?

You need to move out this is border line abusive and a toxic situation for your daughter