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Original poster

AIBU to just have a photo shoot of one child?

179 replies

AnotherAwkwardPost · 13/11/2021 13:53

For context, this is for DD who is having a newborn photo shoot which I am paying for 100% myself.

I want to have only photos of DD at the session and not DSS as he has already had newborn photos, the session is 4-6 hours so will have to battle to keep DSS entertained and the photographer only does sibling photos at special request for an additional cost, which I have not budgeted for.

AIBU to want this, I am paying for everything at the end of the day.

OP posts:
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MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 13/11/2021 13:55

Who has made you think you are being UR?

Itsbeen84yearss · 13/11/2021 13:56

No just have your pics of your baby. We’ve literally just done a sibling photo shoot and it was hard work indeed. If your partner wants pics of them together let him organise and pay for it

ShinyGreenElephant · 13/11/2021 13:58

Of course this is fine. I paid extra for sibling photos at DD2s newborn shoot, DSD didn't like her dress but I'd bought them all to match and it would have looked ridiculous if she'd kept her big black hoody on. As a result she snarled her way through every photo and none of them are usable. Never again. I didnt want to leave her out either so with DD3 we didn't do the sibling pics at all, eve though DSS and my other DDs would have posed beautifully. So much easier if you just stick to the one child in the shoot.

Original poster
AnotherAwkwardPost · 13/11/2021 13:59

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

Who has made you think you are being UR?
DP doesn't want DSS to feel left out so I feel like I'm being the wicked SM now for only wanting pictures of DD.
OP posts:
nimbuscloud · 13/11/2021 13:59

4 to 6 hours???

TurnUpTurnip · 13/11/2021 14:00

Why would this be unreasonable. I wouldn’t want him in the pic either

nimbuscloud · 13/11/2021 14:00

Can you do it on a day when you don’t have dss with you ?

Waahingwashingwashing · 13/11/2021 14:01

Why is this even being organised for a day when DSS is there?

supermodel · 13/11/2021 14:02

DSS will feel left out, couldn’t you have a mix of photos. He is part of family too.

tiggerwhocamefortea · 13/11/2021 14:03

The only unreasonable* part is putting your baby through that for 4-6 hours*

PoppityPop · 13/11/2021 14:03

YANBU but 4-6 hours is ridiculous! It should take no more than 2 hours. Can’t you just do it on a day when DSS isn’t there?

Anoisagusaris · 13/11/2021 14:04

Just do it when DSC kids are not there.

And how on earth could it take 4-6hrs to take some photos of one baby? A newborn baby will need to nap and feed a lot during that time

Original poster
AnotherAwkwardPost · 13/11/2021 14:04

@Waahingwashingwashing

Why is this even being organised for a day when DSS is there?
We haven't chose a date yet. Still in the discussion stage of what to do.
OP posts:
nimbuscloud · 13/11/2021 14:05

And how on earth could it take 4-6hrs to take some photos of one baby?

Yes....

Getyourarseofffthequattro · 13/11/2021 14:05

@supermodel

DSS will feel left out, couldn’t you have a mix of photos. He is part of family too.
He's already had photos done as a new born, alone. Why can't ops baby have that too?
Larryyourwaiter · 13/11/2021 14:05

Tell him to book/pay/organise a sibling shoot.

satci · 13/11/2021 14:06

4 to 6 hours? Really? I would get a few of them together even at additional cost.

satci · 13/11/2021 14:06

@tiggerwhocamefortea

The only unreasonable* part is putting your baby through that for 4-6 hours*
Absolutely
Deansgate · 13/11/2021 14:07

I did.
Each child on their first birthday.

Fits with your 'each child as a new born'. Can't see an issue.

Possibly nice to have photos of the two together, but that could be arranged for another time, at a point in the future.

Original poster
AnotherAwkwardPost · 13/11/2021 14:08

Re the 4-6 hours, the photographer has advised this is how long it usually takes for other clients and they have facilities for feeding, changing etc also in the 4-6 hours has factored time for a break that's why it's that amount of time.

She is a popular photographer who has photographed footballers babies so I'm sure she knows what she is doing. I've only ever had school photos myself so no clue how long these things take! Grin

OP posts:
madisonbridges · 13/11/2021 14:09

A 6 hour photoshoot! As an adult I wouldn't want to be doing that so I doubt your DSS would. Just don't tell your stepson and do it whilst he's not there.

satci · 13/11/2021 14:09

He's already had photos done as a new born, alone. Why can't ops baby have that too?

Of course she will. There's 4 hours for those photos. Second children get to have photos with their siblings too. Half or not that's the normal thing to do.

BraveGoldie · 13/11/2021 14:09

Is this literally just of your baby DD, or is it a photo shoot of Dd with you and her dad? If the latter, then honestly I think that's not good to do while DSS is around. At very least he could join in for some of the photos.... one of the six hours???

If he's not there, then fair enough but I hope you also take and display photos of the siblings together and you all together.

These kind of things can send very strong messages of whether a SC is welcome in a family, and whether they can embrace the arrival of a new sibling or will just see them as rivals.

I think having him stand on the sidelines while the three of you get your photo taken for hours is really horrible.

Stripedfrenchfancies · 13/11/2021 14:10

Book on A day you don’t have dss! Problem Solved :)

AtrociousCircumstance · 13/11/2021 14:10

If he wants your DSS there he can pay half or stump up for another session. YANBU.