Step son driving me nuts on holiday

[MichelleC69]

So we're in Spain for a couple of weeks, with my daughter(16) and step son (18) - this is a final holiday with his dad before he goes off to Uni in Sept. We're beach holiday/chilling out kinda people, and he knew this before he came with us. We work hard all year and the holiday is our chill time. My problem is he is expecting us to entertain him and have things planned every day (other than going to the beach which is apparently boring). My husband has planned a couple of day trips just for the two of them but has made it clear to him that if he wants to do anything else he can go off and do it - he doesn't have to be tied to us, he's an adult! But he has zero drive and is just sticking to us like a limpet, to the point where I had to specifically day this afternoon that I'd like a drink with his dad on our own when he threatened to tag along. Don't know what the answer is but I just needed to offload.

If thats your opinion i feel sorry for your husband.

You’re assuming I’m female and married? How very 1950s of you.

@ JoanMavisIcecreamGirl so what, op said she knows the town well. However step son does not. Who wants to go off alone and explore how boring. Maybe he would not be so clingy to his dad if they all got on.

When we went on holiday I quite often wondered off into town or the beach etc in my own - still do

Medievalist got it in one I think

Well obviously op is going to get on better with her own child ffs. And it helps that her own child enjoys the same type of holiday.

Dss didnt have to come if its not his thing. You dont go on a free holiday and dictate what everyone else does whether youre a step child or not.

I feel sorry for anyone who knows you and has to deal with you in RL.

Bless you - you clearly have a heart of gold.

No i just dont tolerate small minded idiots tbh.

This is my last reply to you, as you’re clearly not having a good day. Why not get out in the sun and enjoy the day, rather than railing against strangers on the internet? You’ll feel much better for it, I’m sure.

@JoanMavisIcecreamGirl calm down you seem to be getting your knickers in a twist. Chill out it’s Saturday.

@Medievalist friends and family are very very different things. I challenge anyone who says they don't need a short break from their kids, whether on holiday or not!

Anyway folks, off to be a total selfish bitch by the pool for the morning, followed by a special treat girls lunch, while the boys are doing a city tour. Because we are clearly a disfunctional family

You're being quite aggressive JoanMavis. Just had to check I hadn't wandered into AIBU by mistake ...

aliens its 8.46am. I have hardly been here for hours. Dont be so patronising and same to you loyalty

I give up. Im sick of every single step parenting thread going this way (because people refuse to accept that every blended family works differently and just assume all step mums are evil) and because i dare to express an opinion i get told to calm down etc.

Challenged him to a game of hide and seek.
Make sure he goes off to hide first..
Take an hour to find him.

I challenge anyone who says they don't need a short break from their kids, whether on holiday or not!

Totally agree! But there are ways of doing it without having to specifically imply you don't want their company.

Do get out in the sun JoanMavis it will do you the world of good.

Will it? Im not sure it will make MNHQ do anything about the barrage of abuse step parents get on a regular basis. I am not sitr it will stop people thing theyre entitled to brand a woman as evil. I am not sure it will do anything to stop people being so small minded when it comes to threads like this.

Please stop patronising me.

Tell me how I should do it then @Medievalist if the subtle hint of going back with his step sister didn't work? Genuinely interested. The boy cannot take a hint.

@OldAndWornOut I like your style although I’d rather hide somewhere further away with a drink in hand.

@joanmavis I'm with you - seems you're not allowed an opinion if it's not of the variety that step mums are evil. And yes, someone did call me evil. Very strong words - you don't know me.

I haven't been using this forum for very long but everything I've posted about being a step parent has resulted in me getting abuse.

Nope still here - no flouncing involved.

Way to build people up. I'm now 'awful' as well as 'evil' and 'needy' Cheers peeps.

You said you were going. I stupidly thought you had.

To the lovely person earlier on the thread NOT the OP who said

We live in a society of snowflakes who will never grow up and I’ve got stuck with a man child

You sound like a horrible stepmum.

Look OP I get it. All blended families are different and by
the same token all 18 year olds are too. They all don't want to be off shagging and climbing mountains. Our teens are the same age and like hanging out with us on hols but you just need to be open and honest.
I suppose it doesn't help that your teens don't get on as I would tell them to go off and do something together.
Just explain you are off for a drink and a walk. Find some common ground as it is starting to come across like you can't stand the lad and it's probably the last holiday he may have with you.