Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Step-parenting

Connect with other Mumsnetters here for step-parenting advice and support.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Did this happen on its own?

398 replies

Crowdblundering · 18/01/2017 18:47

AARHH!!! Soooo pissed off.

Just noticed bloody curtain in our back lounge is totally bent and pulled out of its bracket and the plaster on the wall is all cracked and pulled off.

OH is like "oh I can't imagine how that's happened" and I'm like I am not accusing your kids BUT poles do not just bend and get ripped out of the fucking wall on their own - do they? Or am I a bitch step mother in suspecting them - it is where they sleep.

They are 12 and 10 and really fucking tall - I just wish he would back me up in zero tolerance to the destruction of our home AngrySad

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
IRegretNothing · 19/01/2017 23:56

Well....yes crowd
That's what should happen when a family splits and parents share responsibility.
And I doubt he pays entirely for their bedroom in their real home. More contributes I expect.

Crowdblundering · 19/01/2017 23:57

Really?

OP posts:
RacoonBandit · 19/01/2017 23:57

And?
Does that mean they dont deserve a bedroom with him? Its not their fault yet they are been told I pay for a room already i wont pay for another. Hmm

He has options he is just choosing to be a sit dad.

Oh and is it raf he works for? You have not answered my question about him paying to live on base?

OneWithTheForce · 19/01/2017 23:58

so they are to have two bedrooms?

Err, yes if he wants them to come and stay! what an odd attitude.

IRegretNothing · 19/01/2017 23:58

If your addressing me op then yes. Do I need to repeat myself? Confused It's not a hard concept to get your head around.

Crowdblundering · 19/01/2017 23:58

So we have gone from a curtain being pulled off a wall to him moving out of our home and renting elsewhere - only on MN 😂.

Goodnight.

OP posts:
RacoonBandit · 19/01/2017 23:59

Its not mortgage One OP has already slated the mum for renting.

RacoonBandit · 19/01/2017 23:59

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

OneWithTheForce · 20/01/2017 00:00

No, not only on MN. I happen to be an actual real person in the real world too and I suspect some of these other posters are too. These are real world opinions, they're just posted online.

Oswin · 20/01/2017 00:01

So he pays full rent on the mums house?

Crowdblundering · 20/01/2017 00:01

I avoiding it because it would be bloody stupid of me to divulge on a public forum what my OH does for a living.

Working for the MOD I would have though you would know that?

OP posts:
IRegretNothing · 20/01/2017 00:02

Somewhere along the line his priorities changed. When he was with their mother he was, I assume, wholly dedicated to parenting his dc.
The relationship soured and they split. But now he has other priorities too. And they have shifted down the ladder to be replaced by...well, you and yours. I'm sure he'd be able to provide a room if he compromised. But in 6 yrs he hasn't.
Is that fair on the girls? It must feel like shit tbh.

OneWithTheForce · 20/01/2017 00:02

He's paying half of OP's mortgage racoon but her and her kids have 4 bedrooms between them. His kids don't have any bedrooms.

OneWithTheForce · 20/01/2017 00:05

I'm not really sure what he is getting for his half share of the mortgage. OP says 2 of her DC pay for their rooms so out of all the adults he is paying more than anyone else including OP but he isn't getting a fair return for that.

RacoonBandit · 20/01/2017 00:06

Erm nope working for the mod is not a secret especially on an anonymous forum.

I work for the SBS. See I can say it. OH is in the royal logistics. Dad was in 4 para. I did not ask you for his regiment I asked is he army or raf.

RacoonBandit · 20/01/2017 00:08

RAF is Royal Air Force by the way.

Crowdblundering · 20/01/2017 00:08

Neither.

OP posts:
NoahsArkxx · 20/01/2017 00:10

Personally I think everyone is completely overreacting. When I was 10 I was having sleepovers on my living room floor with 4 of my friends and it was the best thing ever. Yeah we probably didn't swing on the curtain rails for fear of getting a smacked arse but we used to make dens with big blankets and chairs. Maybe that could be a fun solution? Make them a den to sleep in, I know times have changed to mobile phones and Facebook and blah blah blah but I think if you're not gna confront him about his kids running riot then you need to make it fun for them to go to bed. Or even if you guys went and slept downstairs with them for a movie night and stayed up Or camped in the garden. I don't think they need their own room for the amount of time they stay for it's just unnecessary if you don't have the space for it! I think everyone needs to calm their shit and think about when you were 10. I don't really feel like this is a two lounges and your kids don't have a room issueHmmConfused

RacoonBandit · 20/01/2017 00:10

So that leaves navy. Erm you don't pay to be on a ship OP and it is not called a base Hmm

If he lives on land he's an officer and frankly he should be able to afford a bedroom for his kids.

RacoonBandit · 20/01/2017 00:12

Noah this is not a girly sleep over Hmm
It is their second home where dad is. They deserve for it to feel like they are wanted.

IRegretNothing · 20/01/2017 00:13

Oh for gods sake this is tedious. I'm trying to put forward a valid perspective in a courteous way. And you, op, don't bither responding and can only be bothered having a petty argument about where your dh works. Deflecting much?!
Bugger this I'm off.

RacoonBandit · 20/01/2017 00:15

He's been robbed One he is getting naff all for his half a mortgage payment.

Crowdblundering · 20/01/2017 00:15

Not sure what your massively vested interest is in my life racoon and the poster on the other thread you are being equally as unpleasant and aggressive to - but your knowledge of the military is not as great as you think it is - maybe you need to look at why you need to be so unpleasant to people looking for a bit of support and advice or space to vent safely.

Or go over to AIBU.

OP posts:
RacoonBandit · 20/01/2017 00:17

Sorry Iregret

The OP won't actually answer anything. I askead earlier if it took her until Tuesday to notice the damage and the girls left Sunday how sure was she it was them........she never answered.

Crowdblundering · 20/01/2017 00:17

Erm I am not replying because our mortgage our HOME and our financial arrangements are no one else's business -esp weird aggressive strangers on MN.

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread