Here we go!!!

[Nursed123]

It's that time again..... Step kid weekend!

I'm just sitting, with wine in hand, waiting for them to descend.

I really wish I could say I look forward to these weekends but I dread them for various reasons

Here's and for anyone else who can relate

And for all the moaning I do - the children have just arrived and so excited to see me - these are the moments that make me feel so awful for complaining and make it all worthwhile

I suppose I have it easy re: ex. No word in about 4 years and that's the best thing for my boy tbh. to you all though!

Love that update OP!

User the same thing happened to me . I came on here about troubles with coping with step kids and the ex ... I got so slammed I was on the verge of tears and didn't use mumsnet again for well over a year . They were awful . Pisses me off because no one understands unless they are a step parent just how hard it is !!
I can't talk to my friends or sisters about it much either as they judge if I moan etc . So happy I found this post ! Thanks OP! ah glad they are happy to see you , don't feel guilty they don't know that you vent but it's healthier for you that you do

Thanks ladies you've been more of a help than you realise.
We should never feel guilty for saying how we feel . If ever anyone wants a rant feel free to message me!

I agree that there has been a slight much needed shift in attitudes on this board and I definitely think that it's a good thing!

Rant away!

It's perfectly acceptable on mn to be fed up with whatever is going on with your own kids but never EVER when it's your step kids inexplicably.

I love my stepkids, I do. But a part of me was relieved that one of them (the difficult one) couldn't come this weekend. Not because I don't want to see her, but it's been a long, shitty week and I couldn't face the drama this weekend.

I agree ! So true . This is refreshing . I totally get your relief . We normally have dsc 2, often 3 nights per week but this weekend my DD is having a few days away with family and I actually spoke up for the first time and said I want a child free weekend . I am never EVER child free because even when mine is away his are here . DH actually agreed and told the ex we needed a few days off . I am so looking forward to a few days without 6am wake ups , cooking and cleaning up after everyone .

I find it hard because the mother abused the kids, social services are involved and I feel anything I do wrong is scrutinised by my partner and his ex's parents who now have custody, yet she was allowed to get away with her behaviour.
It sounds awful but when they come I feel bored and trapped in the house it doesn't help the eldest has autism and because I am worried about been reported to as I don't feel I can cope with his outbursts in public

She also got him to write a letter to solicitor saying I should "apologise for my behaviour".. Oh wow, that is pretty shocking!

Yeah it said I was unreasonable and I should apologise and he only wanted mummy, daddy (my DH) and dad (his SD).

ExW insists he calls SD dad but has also told him not to call me mum ( I wouldn't want my daughter calling another woman mum so have never wanted to be called mum) but she doesn't know that he doesn't anyway and she should not actively look to put me lower than her own husband you know?

You aren't awful OP we all complain about lots of things in life including other people it's normal to need to express your feelings.

Can I join your club please?

Like a lot of you I actually get on okay with ss.

I have two step kids, although sometimes consider it to be three.

Dp has two bio kids, one step child himself (as in his ex had a kid when he met her)

Anyway, we only see ss, because dps ex basically told sd lies about me and her dad until she decided not to see us anymore.

The eldest one (dps ss) sees us when he wants cash.

Anyway we see ss twice a week and it's usually fine, and we get on but admittedly sometimes it gets to me. I get more frustrated by the state he gets to us in.

Before now he's been crying because his sister told him his dad doesn't love him anymore, because we had a baby.

His mum told him his dad would forget about him soon. She told him his dad loves me more than him and we were going to move away and leave him.

It's an actual real life nightmare sometimes honestly!

His mum told him his dad would forget about him soon.

My dh's exw tried this shit about a decade ago. Thankfully we got residency not that long after. It's actually her who's vanished bloody hypocrite but it's been the best thing for dss tbh.

I just find it absolutely batshit crazy that you would want to hurt your own child by saying something like that!

She couldn't stand the fact that dss and dh are incredibly close or that he looked just like his dad. Bloody weirdo lol

*looks

Haha that's true for dps ex.

She favours her daughter because she looks and acts just like her (not good on the behaviour front) and she treats ss like shit because he looks and acts like his dad.

I really do wonder about her parenting skills from some of the things ss says.

She leaves him with sd a lot and she is absolutely horrible to him.

Well my dh's exw is now trying for a baby having remarried.... and having had no contact with dss for many years. She told us years ago that she hopes to have a girl

When she did have contact, her dh was no sd to him whatsoever. I'm glad they're not in his life really.

She sounds delightful!

Ex hasn't had a relationship for 5 years. For about two years she begged dp to go back and marry her. She would take him back now still im sure. She did the whole oh can you give me a lift (even tho she can drive) oh can you come fix this, do that. Worst thing? He did it.

He took the kids out and she asked to go with him and he took her. There was pictures of them both with the kids. I've never forgiven him for that.

He still panders to her though because she threatens to stop access.

I think if she had a partner she would be less needy and annoying.

She messaged him on New Year's Day asking where her money was. Errrrr bank. Fucking. Holiday.

I wish she'd only contact him about the kids but she cannot help herself.

It sounds like he's a lot better off with you x

I can't say anything bad about my DSS as they are both very dear to me. DH had full custody when we met and they had contact with their mum once a fortnight.

I can empathise with the exW hatred though. While we get on better now, she came to our wedding minus her own husband and then asked my DH for sex. At his wedding to me. The bitch. He told her to fuck off and she went home with his younger brother...

Oh dear god that's awful.

I would have lost my shit!!

I didn't know about it until afterwards. He didn't want to ruin the day because I would have given her a slap.

This thread is vile.

MotherofA, many many parents don't believe in making their children clear their plates of all food. It's an extremely bad eating habit not to allow children to listen to their own bodies telling them they are full.